Madican wrote:
And Zang, if it has such a clear plot then sum it up in one sentence. Also, I never said tutorial mode, I said weave it into the story. Do not just throw dozens of made-up words at the reader and then not explain any of them at all. Have a character ask about it. The girl for example, she's been shown to not really have any understanding of the outside world and is extremely curious. She doesn't know much about magic, she doesn't know much about history, she doesn't know much about anything. Do not leave the audience in the dark.
Sette asks about things at several points, the primary example being
during Duane's duel on the cliff. As to summing it up in one sentence, that's extremely simple:
A thief-lord's daughter is sent on a personal mission to prove her worth with the aid of one indebted to him (Duane); however, they are sidetracked by a group of smugglers pulling them into their web of deceit.Quote:
You are the one who does not understand how storytelling works Zang. When I write I tend to go by Brandon Sanderson's thoughts on things. Magic for example. In Way of Kings he introduces three separate magic systems in the very first chapter: Surgebinding, Shards, and Soulcasting. He does not just throw information at the reader at the expense of all else, he gives a piece at a time, building upon it until you completely understand each of those systems. What their limitations are, the primary things you can do, and how they affect the world they're set in. I'll look more closely at Shards for this one. In the very first chapter you learn a Shardblade can cut any nonliving material, require ten heartbeats to summon, can only be blocked by Shardplate, etc. You don't learn it all at once though, it's woven into the story. The character remarks on the ten heartbeats to bring forth his weapon, remarks on how before a Shardblade men are little more than phantasms, and how it's going to be difficult to fight this knight because he is armed with Plate and Blade. Unique terms for this world, but it's okay because you get the explanation of what they are without pulling you out of the story.
The only things I can truly think of that are difficult to follow are the various nations as they receive little exposition. I feel no real connection to any of them, though that is more due to a lack of any clear 'good' and 'bad,' though in the context of this story I think it is a good thing that everyone is pretty much in a moral grey area (
Excepting the smugglers, they're bad!)
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THAT is proper worldbuilding. The first chapter, the prologue, and the reader has an idea of the world without forsaking the plot. In fact, you learned it all within the plot without even realizing it. To just do worldbuilding, to throw out terms and words without explaining them, expecting people to understand the politics of the world without giving a reason to, that is bad worldbuilding. That's what Unsounded suffers from.
Opinionated and with a lack of attempt to understand the world offered, it would seem. Thinking about it for more than half a second makes the world come alive in many degrees, there is no need to read the wiki to follow the story at all; I fully understood what was going on before reaching the current end and realizing there even was a wiki. What exactly were you confused by, honestly? I see you saying all these things are unexplained, and yet, I can't think of anything really that goes unanswered, unless intended by the plot.
Oh, right, lurking.
Woops.