AWKWARD ZOMBIE

i am a direct descendant of my father

Well, one of my probable ancestors was the first Italian to win the Nobel Prize in literature, so I can easily defeat your despotism with my poetry!

Also, since I am related to Queen Elizabeth, that also means I am related to the current royal family.

My mom is joking about inviting them for a family reunion.

Where did you guys figure all this out? The furthest back I can find is when my family settled in the Americas

Hey Wordsmith, if the entire royal family dies would you inherit the throne like King Ralph?

Bad Vrom
No assassinations

I always thought my name was irish but it turns out my grandmother left ireland to elope with a yorkshireman and took his name

I'm a descendent of Daniel Boone on my dad's side, who was an American explorer, and Moses Fletcher on my mom's side, who was a guy who came to America on the Mayflower.
Other than that my ancestors were mostly German peasants who farmed sugar beets in Russia, starting around when Cathrine the Great was in rule in the 18th century

I'm descended from teachers, soldiers and blacksmiths.

I know up to my grandparents, then squat. None of my family ever talks about anything further back, I think it's a "white people" thing (I kid). I swear though, when I was younger my parents would never talk about anyone other than my grandmother who is still alive. Even she doesn't mention what her family was like, just where they live or how they lived.

Although from the small things I've heard my dad talk about I think I might have Spain ancestry. Since his mother had natural straight blonde hair and blue eyes, my niece has natural blonde highlights in her hair and the rest of it is a light brown. Since he's from El Salvador I doubt it's anything else since El Salvador and Guatemala both have mayans and the like.

I'm related to Wilhelm Frick and some guy who was asked to be the president of the Confederation

never get me or anyone I'm related to on your side in a war
you'll lose

So when we say "Frick" instead of "fuck" then we're invoking your ancestor's name?

Say it 3 times and you get a free bagel

Where's my fricking bagel

It's raining stale doughnuts over here