AWKWARD ZOMBIE

YES! I am destroying iTunes and time! the evil plot is working

anyway

Granted, it screws up a lot of sciency things and everybody dies.

I wish I had some glue

Granted, but you somehow glue your mouth closed and you die of starvation.

I wish these shorts are longer.

Granted, but they get too long and you are unable to walk in them/the point of wearing them is ruined.

I wish I made sense

Granted, but nobody else cares.

I wish I was a real hedgehog.

Granted, you stick your head into a tiny place and suffocate.

I wish I had my computer back.

Granted, but it's subscribed to the worst RSS feed in the whole universe.

I wish I had a dog.

Granted but it jumps off a clift

I wish I had a d.s

Granted, but all your friends get DSI's and make fun of you forever.

I wish that I had a bunch of really cool emoticons.

Granted, they're frozen.
If I could just have one wish, truely, from the bottom of my heart, I would look back on life, turn it into a tasty fish, and eat it quietly by the window sill.

Granted, but the fish is raw.

I wish I had a wish.

Granted. You wish for a wish for a wish. Causing a paradox.

I wish I could draw well.

Granted. But the wonders of your paintings make the head of whoever laid eyes on it explode.

I wish I would die.

Granted, you're reincarnated a hobo.

I wish the speakers would work.

Granted, but they give to much feed back.

I wish I had a Xbox 360.

Granted, but as soon as you open it it does the ring off death and, well... dies

I wish I had an apple.