AWKWARD ZOMBIE

what if there was an underwear ad wear the model guy was standing there with a huge boner inside the underwear and the tagline read "Warning: may cause excessive happiness"

it seems every time peter visits for more than a couple days i end up getting sick
first time, during christmas break, i got canker sores all over my tongue and ended up getting a fever that topped to 104 degrees fahrenheit
this time i ate way too much junk food and ended up puking my lungs out the morning after and felt sick all weekend

why does this keep happening

Peter is miasma incarnate?

that makes sense
i blame him for everything

He is your anathema and his blood is foulest vitriol.

Sorry, I can't help it if you're not used to my Canadian bacteria.

Timhortitis

I mopped the floor yesterday only for my dog to piss, puke and shit on it as he got home with my mom.

It feels a bit like an insult.

i have had to pee like 20 times today

i haven't even drank all that much

where is it coming from

Probably a mild bladder infection. Frequent urinating also depends on your sodium intake.

Sometimes I need to take off my pants to be able to properly go to sleep at night.

Though there was a time where I woke up and my hand was down my pants.

I dont even know why.

I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT

my hand like always gets down there i'm not even aware of it half the time

Like, I'll go to bed, roll onto my stomach, and suddenly I realize my arm is in a weird position and wait where is my hand what do i feel there oh wait yep that's my dick

thats partly subconscious,part muscle memory.

No, it's much simpler.
It's me.
When you're sleeping I break into your homes and prep you into funny poses.

If its possible to get physically sick from being so exhaused then ai qm there. Ive been nausiated all morning and last night. Either that or I need to eat something.