AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Get the lord to perform a dance with you. A dance of death, that is. With your dark elven charm it should be a snap. Of the neck.

Man, what is up with all these murderous thoughts? Is this why other races don't trust dark elves? You don't know if you can murder the Lord easily; but you could use some of his wardrobe.


You wait until night to make your move.


And you're in! The Lord is sleeping right now and there's his wardrobe! All this sneaking reminds you of why you need different clothes, yellow is a horrible color no matter what you do!


It appears that the Lord just suffered a heart attack. There is no way you could have predicted/stopped/contributed to this! He's dead Jim! And it's not your fault! Well, guess you can raid the wardrobe now, what kind of clothes do you want?

Something with leopard print on it.

Look through the lord's closet for something dark blue, prefferably something form fitting and easy to move around in.
Also pretend to be the lord and search for the treasury.

Craft a suit out of the lord's skin.
Or get some fancy gold woven clothes, whatever you prefer.

Get a black cape.

Definitely take his shoulder cape, that thing is sweet.

Repressing memory in three...two...one...



This is about as dark as it gets in here. There's some pants you'll take with it. Keep the vest, you never know when you might to look your swash-buckliest. And you'll search for the treasury right after this:




Huh, looks like he was just hanging the clasp of all his capes over one of his shoulders to make it look like he was special and didn't conform to normal cape standards. Wow, he's kind of depressingly needy.
ANYWAYS! On to the treasury!


Guess there's a benefit to having guards who just don't care.
...
Wait. What's that!?


Oh God. Oh God. A spider. Please don't let it see yo-






You awaken in jail, awaiting execution for murder of a lord, theft, arson, assault, breaking & Entering, and jay-walking.
They locked the door this time. There isn't even a chamber pot. You don't see any means of escape by yourself...




























CHAPTER TWO: PLAYER TWO: you know the drill.

But, He could still break through the paint layers...

Hello, Mr. Exposition here. Thank you for calling it a paint layer, because this is in fact made with Paint.net, rather than, say, Gimp. However, I would like to point out that breaking through these layers would not only be a form of deliberately breaking the fourth wall, a task we are not yet willing to do. Perhaps in the future such a thing may occur, but this is not it. Not only that, but that would not be breaking, but abusing the fourth wall. Our lawyers are not yet ready for such a case. Digressing, I ask that you refrain from arguing this point and carry on with the "plot" and create player two, perhaps saving player one from his certain doom and creating a coherent storyline of some sort(however it is entirely possible for player two to abandon player one, just for reference.). Thank you for your time.

An imperial Lawyer named John Smith.

Seconded

Your name is John Smith, and as an Imperial Citizen this badgering is unlawful. I should have you arrested!


Bloody ruffian.


You arrive in tow- OH FOR- What is that guard doing!? You swear, these townsfolk are like drunken, retarded monkeys with blindfolds..

Read the local papers, after getting a good cup, or sphere, of tea/coffee.

Who on earth put the boots back on that guard?