AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Granted, but you're buried right next to him.


I wish I had something to wish for.

Granted but we will absolutely corrupt it within the hour.

I wish my mohawk would say something and not kill me.

He rhetorically asks if you need your balls, shortly before cutting them off.

With his blunt axe.

I wish Steam would stop being a whore and do what I wanted.

Granted but you suffer from ADD and forget what you wanted.

I wish my mohawk would not hurt me. In any way shape and form.

Granted. It kills you, but painlessly.

I wish I didn't need to get laid!

Granted. Your genitals are seared off.

I wish I got another page get.

Granted, but you get turned into a lemming.

I wish my classmates aprecciated my ork-themed boomerang.

Woo Evil Sunz

Granted, but now they all fight you for it.

I wish I could skip 4 hours ahead, after show choir is finished.

You skip four hours, days, years and decades into your future.

Suddenly, your an old woman who's lost all of her youth and possible education.

You die from lonliness.

Like swans.

I wish Saints Row 2 would actually download, instead of saying that it's updating 0%, when it hasn't even fully downloaded yet.

Gee, what a shameful act by Steam.

Granted but it only works anywhere but your house.

I wish I had a million d ollars.

In Soviet Russia Page gets you!

Granted.


Unfortunately, it's monopoly cheddar.

Or The Game of Life cheddar.

Whichever you prefer.


I wish for more Ned.

Granted. But the Ned you get is a ignorant retard and he tries to stab you every time you go near him.

I wish everyone i know would stop dying. (my moms friend died ;~; )

(Firstly Im sorry to hear that but I must continue the thread)
Granted. But to recieve the treatments they need, everyone you know is teleported to another world millions of lightyears away.

I wish I had a penny, a normal sized penny, a lost one that no one cares about me owning, made out of your normal penny materials, and is dangerous in no way.

(I know you'll find a way screw this up but I wanted to make it harder
)

Granted, but you find it in the bottom of the barrel of a lit cannon. Boom.

I wish I could live in the forum. I don't know why.

Granted but no avatar signature or smiley face wants to be your friend. And you cry yourself to sleep from lonliness.

I wish I could live in WOW forever and they were always releasing new content with no bugs.