AWKWARD ZOMBIE

When in doubt, Alt+F4 out.

Madican give him your phone number so he can practice with you

My training is a strict regiment of finger flexibility and speed. One must know the keyboard as intimately as themselves. Capable of striking the correct keys by mere memory without glancing down even once.

If he is to be up to the task then he must demonstrate his skill with five-hundred words in five minutes on the properties of nonsensical training. No homerow!

Phone sex can be a bit awkward if you think too much about it.
Just say what you'd like to do if you were actually doing it and stuff.

"I put on my robe and wizard hat."

Sing karaoke comprised entirely of dirty limericks.

I should have expected nothing less from you guys.

"Neither of us is a stranger to the concepts of romance. You are in an understanding of the basic concepts of trustworthiness and, thus, I too share this understanding. I am imagining a full committed relationship, which I am in assumption you would not be able to receive from most males.

Now, my darling, we are nothing if not animals of a mammalian nature. Let us fornicate or love much like the beasts of the wild, as shown on the television broadcast of Discovery Channel."

either she hangs up right then and there or she continues with you

if it is the latter

hold on to this woman

because she is the greatest thing you will ever find in life.

And there I was trying to actually give advice. Oh well.

Tell her the right side. All of it.

I hate everyone here but D-Vid.

i don't think i could ever do phone sex.

My lungs hurt.

Just describe what you'd like to do to her. Detail your actions. It might feel a bit awkward at first, but if she's really into it then it should be easy to get caught up in it. Phone sex can actually be pretty great.

Watch Terminator and copy what the dude on the phone says

oh mi god yes