HEY GUYS
GUESS WHAT TIME IT IS. THAT'S RIGHT.
COOKING WITH RIKU
TIME FOR THE MOST ROMANTICAL DINNER OF YOUR FREAKING LIFE. Auntie Riku is making a delicious, fantastic feast that will have you crammed so full of aphrodisiacs that you'll want to make out with the nearest person of the appropriate gender. And if that proves lacking, possibly your plate as you lick it clean.
Time for an entirely delicious white wine seafood sauce.
Ingredients:
6 TBS butter
3 TBS flour
1 PINT heavy cream
Several cloves of garlic
2 CUPS white wine (Riku's favorite for this kind of thing is Sauvignon Blanc)
16 OZ shredded Romano Cheese
1/2 CUP milk
Cream cheese
fresh ground pepper
about 16 OZ seafood
Pasta, of course
You can halve this recipe if it's just going to be two people eating.
Instructions:
FIRST THINGS FIRST:
Ah, you know what, you've heard Riku say this four thousand and a third times. Wash your hands, tie back your hair, make sure the kitchen is cl--
What is that cluttering up the Not-Riku's kitchen?
That is not Auntie Riku.
Oh Right, it's Sloth. Errybody say hi.
NOW ONTO THE PREP WORK.
Grate your cheese. It takes a while. Sloth is working very hard at grating the cheese in a manly and somewhat aggressive way.
Prep your seafood. If you have to use frozen shrimp, just set them in a bowl full of cold water, and they'll thaw within ten minutes (don't forget to shell them afterward). Riku also bought crab and mussels, although she normally prefers scallops in place of the mussels. You can use whatever combination of seafood you like.
Riku forgot to take pictures while she was cleaning the mussels off, but what you do is essentially just rinse them off really well and make sure that the shells are clean.
Now, get the garlic ready. How much you use depends on how much you like garlic. RIKU LOVES GARLIC AND SO SHOULD YOU.
Anyway. What you do first, is peel off a few layers of the papery skin, and then smack the bulb to get a couple of cloves off.
After that, you take one of the cloves and press the flat of a large knife against it, using the heel of your hand to press down directly over the clove (there was a picture of this, but it disappeared). Be careful not to press too hard though. You just want to crack the shell, not smash the garlic. You should get something like this.
Peel the shell off, and repeat for all of your garlic. Afterward, roughly chop your garlic up.
AND SLOTH IS STILL GRATING THE CHEESE.
AFTER THE PREP WORK IS DONE
Put your butter into as large a pot as you can find. This is about 6 TBS.
MELT IT. MELT ITS FACE OFF.
Just kidding, butter doesn't have a face.
So now you add the flour in, and stir it around to make a roux.
Once it gets all bubbly like this
pour in your cream.
Probably not the kind of cream that half of you are thinking, though.
After that, you add your garlic and stir it in. Let it heat up on medium for a couple of minutes.
Add about half of the cheese, and half of the wine. Stir it all up and get someone to keep stirring.
Seriously. They need to stir constantly. Without stopping. No breaks.
Anyways, you want that to come to a near simmer for a little while.
Riku generally likes to use Sauvignon Blanc with seafood and creamy sauces, but this time, all Sloth's parents had was a Moscato, which she had never tried before. So IT WAS AN ADVENTUUUUUURRRRRRE.
While that's going, now you should start your seafood. if you're using shrimp like Riku, then pour a splash of wine into a large skillet/frying pan, and just put the shrimp in on medium heat. be sure to move them around, and then when they're almost completely cooked, they should look like this.
Do not cook them all the way now, or else they will be overcooked in the sauce.
Pull the shrimp out and put them in a bowl, but leave the liquid. This is what you'll use to steam your mussels.
Put the mussels into the pan, shake the pan a bit so that the mussels spread about, and then just put the lid on and call it good for about five minutes.
THIS IS WHEN YOU CHECK UP ON THE PERSON WHO WAS SUPPOSED TO BE STIRRING THIS WHOLE TIME TO MAKE SURE THAT THEY ARE STILL DOING SO IN A MANLY FASHION.
Sloth was doing this quite wonderfully.
Now, you add about a half cup of milk and a large dollop of cream cheese. Stir it up again.
put in as much pepper as you like. As stated in a previous recipe, Riku loves pepper. AND RIKU IS ALWAYS RIGHT.
Now your mussels should be pretty much done and looking like this.
Now is a good time to get your pasta cooking. I shouldn't need to explain this.
Now you pour the liquid from the mussels, along with the shrimp and remaining cheese and wine into the sauce. Don't put the crab, mussels or scallops (whatever else you're using) in just yet, unless it will need a fair amount longer to cook. These things cook really quickly, and you don't want to get them overdone.
Mix all of it together and let it simmer for about fifteen minutes, still stirring often.
This is when you pull the meat out of the mussels. However, if you want to do a pretty thing with the plates, be careful not to break the shells or throw them away. Especially if you have blue mussels.
During the last five minutes or so of simmering, add in whatever seafood you haven't already, and let it finish. Riku loves seafood like nothing else (except possibly orange juice) and has used more than a pound of protein in hers, not that you can tell from this photo.
Put some pasta onto a plate, put some of the sauce into it, add a little leftover crab to make some nice color, and then turn the mussel shells into butterflies. the indigo in the shells makes the whole thing really pretty.
IT'S BEAUTIFUL, GODDAMMIT.
There would be a picture of Sloth and Auntie Riku enjoying their lovely dinner, but they were too busy enjoying the food and then making out.
See, we tooooold you.
Also, don't forget to clean up afterward, otherwise EVERYONE WILL BE SAD.
And here's another picture of Sloth while we were at the grocery store. He was tiiiiired.
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