AWKWARD ZOMBIE

I never shit in public restrooms. I do piss on the seats though, just to troll people and make them do the same out of spite.

That's why I always break bathroom code: Never use the first stall. Almost everyone goes by this code in the south except for the germaphobes. The seats are usually nice and clean, more often than not.

I usually head for the wheelchair stall.

Someone rustled on the floor like 2 feet in front of a urinal at my school.

And I stepped in it. Good thing I wear shoes.

Speaking of school restrooms...

One time, I found a whole mess of diarrhea in the sink at my old middle school. WHY? JUST WHY?

I would have cried

Did anyone watch the katrina footage from the superdome?

THOSE BATHROOMS
I NEVER WANTED TO GO TO THE SUPERDOME AGAIN AFTER THAT

but I did

Answered your own question there, pal.

At my old high school they used to piss in the hand soap. If the soap wasn't red, don't wash your hands.

Someone went around replacing all of the hand soap in the bathrooms with a similarly colored syrup on April Fool's Day in this one. Everyone was raging so hard.
EDIT: To clarify, they empited out the hand soap and poured syrup into the containers. In case anyone thought that people were pouring bottles of clearly labeled syrup on their hands.

guys

my hands sweat

like

hardcore.

if i'm grabbing on anything like a mouse or a pen they sweat

ughhhhhh how do i stop it from happening

Talcum powder helps. If it'll prevent diaper rash from sweating and other activities therein, it should help out your hands.

Cut your hands off.

Become god.
Say "fuck this shit."
????
Profit.

Wipe it on your pants or shirt. It usually works for me.

If I'm holding the hand of a girl I like, my hands will sweat nonstop