AWKWARD ZOMBIE

I can hug guys and think nothing of it.

But when I hug a girl, I hold on tight and I don't want it to end.

I don't hug.

I have received 4 hugs from someone other than family since I turned 13.

I have a very punchable face. Like seriously, if you were to see my face, I am 100% certain you would break out into a fit of uncontrollable rage and punch me. Right in the face. It's that bad. I can't even look at my own reflection D=

I'm really a duck.

pix

Were you attacked by a grue?

Unfortunately (or fortunately, depending on how you look at it), I'm not very photogenic, so I tend not to take pictures. Which is a good thing, considering I'm sure the photographer would punch me.



I wouldn't doubt it. I have trouble remember anything that happened before I was 5, and I'm sure it was due to a traumatic attack from a Grue that disfigured my face.

Or something. I dunno.

Man. That's harsh.

If it's any consolation, I wouldn't punch you in the face.

Mostly because there's a giant narwhal 'horn' jutting out of it, but you know. It's the thought that counts.

narwhal horns are bendy

I was trying to come up with a comeback but the only thing I thought of is really stupid.

no! it was funny, i promise

So is your mother.
In bed.




Yeah, I got nothing...

"So's a boner, but you don't wanna bend that now do you?"

IT'S NOT FUNNY. :'C

I'm always making dick jokes.