AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Have you tried a dermatologist or something, Alkarii? That's not normal.

I was going to, but I decided it can wait until I can afford insurance first, because apparently it's a legal requirement to have it now.

My secret is not having any. Don't tell people.

I noticed an hour ago that I almost always feel rather surprised to see a face staring back at me through the mirror.
I know I'm supposed to have a reflection, but I always seem to feel off when I see someone who looks like me staring back at me.

When I was told that my parents would be splitting up, the first thing I felt was excitement and relief. When my mom told me she wanted me to stay with her and not dad, I felt terror and determination to get my dad to keep me instead. As I gradually realized that they apparently decided against actually splitting up, I felt disappointment and annoyance.
I still wish sometimes that when my mom first told me they were thinking of splitting, that I hadn't for whatever reason stayed quiet when I wanted to immediately ask "Do I get to stay with Dad?" Of course considering that my mom's responses to the various times I ran out of the room away from her were to get mad at me rather than think "Maybe I should be a person that people don't want to run away from" who knows how that would have gone.

I have this thing where I frequently don't actually understand the intent behind the things people say until after I've replied to it, but my reply is able to be misinterpreted as a valid response I could have had if I understood what I was listening to in the first place.

Nine times out of ten.

Either I'm so bad at conversation that my Conversation stat frequently drops from -127 to 127 due to data overflow or I don't even know where I was going with this sentence.

I've given a bus driver that sometimes drives the bus I take on my way home a nickname. I've never interacted with him or anything but I gave him the nickname 'Smiles' (purely in my head, not out loud), because I think he has such a warm and friendly smile.

^ In my hometown there's this guy that always greets everyone by saying "Howdy neighbor" so someone gave him the nickname "Neighbor" and now the whole town calls him that.

Everyone I know calls me Resting Bitch Face and I have no idea why.

because you have the face of a sleeping dog.

I guess when you're at your "default" face, you look super angry?

Mom always looks furious when she isn't thinking about anything.

Just, like, eating.
Driving.
Browsing the internet.
Staring at the TV.
Sleeping.
Breathing.

I brought it up to her a few times and she always seems surprised about it.

i apparently have a really strong resting bitch face too

it's usually not a problem except at church when old people think that because you aren't smiling and socializing you're upset about something and come tell me to 'SMILE IT CAN'T BE THAT BAD!!!' bitch i have depression, yes it can. it wasn't, but it can, and now i'm just pissy go away

I have a dead neutral resting face and people give me all sorts of strange comments on what they thing my emotions are.

Reactions range from fear, telling me to not be so depressed, comments on how intelligent I appear (I will never understand that, I think I look dumb), to comments about how charismatic I am.

Which is annoying as I don't like attention being drawn to me.

I also get a lot of comments about my hair due to my supernatural ability to not have to even acknowledge it exists to be publicly presentable, which is also annoying.


On that note, my family frequently points out that my hai doesn't actually look black, but seems to naturally be a reeeeally dark shade of either blue or green.
So it turns out that I am an anime character.

'grats, you're raven-haired

at least that's what 'black hair that shines blue' is supposed to be called. it just reminds me of my immortal lmao