AWKWARD ZOMBIE

usually not funny
It is currently Thu Nov 13, 2025 4:11 pm

All times are UTC - 5 hours




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 674 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1 ... 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 ... 45  Next

What shall the next adventure be?
The Adventures of Maximillian Gaylord Finkelmeier 30%  30%  [ 7 ]
An Adventure. IN SPACE. 52%  52%  [ 12 ]
The unamed first person one. 17%  17%  [ 4 ]
Total votes : 23
Author Message
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Sep 06, 2009 4:40 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Sun Aug 02, 2009 8:02 pm
Posts: 756
Location: In the closet
Look up synonyms of 'SUPRISE' n your dictionary, and then shout it st the top of your voice when you storm into the room. If you storm into the room.
Otherwise look up a synonym for 'sneaky', because that's what you'll have to be.

_________________
No, wait, ignore that.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Sep 06, 2009 4:49 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Mon Jul 27, 2009 12:09 pm
Posts: 1507
Location: Place which lacks pooftas
Eat the PRESUMABLY EDIBLE SUBSTANCE. Time to find out if it really is edible.

_________________
ImageImage


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Sep 06, 2009 4:53 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Wed Jul 29, 2009 8:30 pm
Posts: 1272
NO! He has to eat that when he is nearly dead from fighting the Doctor! That's when he realizes that it gives him super powers!

_________________
Image


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Sep 06, 2009 5:00 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Sat Sep 20, 2008 6:53 am
Posts: 13334
Location: australia
March in there like the Space Marine you imagined to be (not) so long ago.

Paint the wall with his spine


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Sep 06, 2009 5:04 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Mon Jul 27, 2009 12:09 pm
Posts: 1507
Location: Place which lacks pooftas
gigoergong wrote:
NO! He has to eat that when he is nearly dead from fighting the Doctor! That's when he realizes that it gives him super powers!


Shoot, I'm sorry. :(

So...equip the infinity revolver instead.

_________________
ImageImage


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Sep 06, 2009 5:40 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue Feb 17, 2009 4:04 pm
Posts: 4706
Location: Here
Quote:
Destroy the generators with the rocket launcher. May as well do some damage before you die.


You decide to waste your only RPG shot on one of the giant generators. It explodes spectacularly. You're are very glad you wasted your shot on the generator, and are positive that it could in no way help you in your fight against The Doctor.

Quote:
Go up to the computer and press Ctrl+V

See what juicy niblets of information are pasted onto the blank canvas of a Word document.

Because It's important to know what your enemy has been copying.


You head over to the computer. You decide to paste whatever was last copied and see what it is. Unfortunately, the computer is running on one of those really old operating systems where you have to type whatever you want it to do, so it doesn't work.

Quote:
Gather all useful information from the computer and then bash the computer to pieces with whatever you can.
Leave no traces of computer behind.


You try all sorts of commands on the computer to get it to give you important info. You type things like "RUN IMPORTANT_INFO.EXE", "RUN EVIL_PLAN.EXE" and even "JUST GIVE ME THE daisies IMPORTANT INFO YOU USELESS COMPUTER". None of them work. You give up and proceed to beat the computer to pieces with your PIPE. Due to the fact it is impossible to destroy matter, there are still some traces of computer behind, but you beat the computer pretty daisies good.

Quote:
Place WORN PENNY inside your left ear. It can act as a good luck charm.

You place the WORN PENNY in you ear. You figure it might bring good luck, but it most likely will just end up being completely useless. Like most of your inventory, actually.

Quote:
Eat the PRESUMABLY EDIBLE SUBSTANCE. Time to find out if it really is edible.


You eat the PRESUMABLY EDIBLE SUBSTANCE. It tastes sort of like one of those rag-towel things they use to wipe down surfaces in cafeterias. Now that you think of it, it kind of looked like one too. You figure that it's just a coincidence.

Quote:
Throw something into the room first.

They probably have some sort of super-laser defense system like in Mystery Men.


You begin to head over to the door so you can throw something in to see if there is some sort of over-complicated defense system. You hear that voice again.

"YOUR TIMING, I MUST ADMIT, WAS EXCELLENT. IN ONLY A FEW HOURS, MY PLAN WILL COMMENCE. IF YOU HAD SHOWN UP ONLY A SHORT WHILE LATER, I WOULD HAVE TO POSTPONE MY PLAN TO DEAL WITH YOU. DON'T WORRY, THOUGH. YOU WON'T LIVE TO SEE THE DESTRUCTION. "

You open the door and toss in your JANITOR'S KEYS, as you are pretty sure you won't be needing them any more. Nothing happens.

Quote:
Look up synonyms of 'SUPRISE' n your dictionary, and then shout it st the top of your voice when you storm into the room. If you storm into the room.


You look up some synonyms of the word 'surprise' in your dictionary, which apparently also doubles as a thesaurus. You find a suitable substitute and charge in the room. You yell at the top of your lungs:

WONDERMENT!

The room is incredibly large and open. In the center is what appears to be a HUGE white jet-battleship-thing. It has a very long "nose", with it's wings close to the back than the front. The part between the two wings comes up a bit, and is presumably where the control room is. It is mostly flat on the top, and is probably made so people could stand on it if they wish.

However, something far more threatening (at least at the moment) approaches. It has a small amount of machinery attached to it, most likely a speaker that allows it to communicate. It's small for one of it's kind, but that's still pretty freaking big. It looks straight at you. A voice comes from the speaker.

"SURPRISED?"

You've been through a lot of strange things today, but nothing quite like this. The thing standing in front of you is a a fucking tyrannosaurus rex.

"THAT'S RIGHT. I AM DR. TYRANIBOCULAR. I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU WERE EXPECTING, BUT FROM THE LOOK ON YOUR FACE, I CAN TELL IT CERTAINLY WASN'T THIS. I'M SURPRISED ONE OF YOUR INTELLIGENCE MANAGED TO LAST SO LONG, BUT THIS, I'M AFRAID, IS WHERE IT ALL ENDS. THIS IS THE END OF YOUR TALE, YOUR LIFE, YOUR ADVENTURE. PREPARE TO DIE".

It looks like he's going to attack!

INVENTORY:
ANTI-AIR MISSILE LAUNCHER, BLOODIED LINT, BUSINESS CARD, DICTIONARY, INFINITY REVOLVER, MOP, PIPE, PLANT, POISONED BROOM JAVELIN, SAFE, SCRAMBILONI'S CLOTHING, SCRAMBILONI'S WALLET, STAPLER, VARIOUS SNACKS (Eight)
EQUIPPED:
HAT, NAMETAG, TRILBY-ESQUE CLOTHES, WORN-OUT PENNY


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Sep 06, 2009 5:44 pm 
Offline
how much is a score
User avatar

Joined: Wed Aug 12, 2009 11:12 am
Posts: 9905
Location: Not France
Use bloodied lint to distract his tyranosaur senses.

While he's ditracted, contemplate how FREAKING AWESOME a cyber-doctor T-Rex is.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Sep 06, 2009 5:59 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Mon Jan 14, 2008 6:28 am
Posts: 9193
Location: 70s Anime Land
Ame no Akai wrote:
Betcha regret wasting that RPG now, huh?!



Um.

Yeah, sorry about that.


And better yet, combine the INFINITY REVOLVER and ANTI-AIR MISSILE LAUNCHER to get infinite missiles.

Somehow.

_________________
Image


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Sep 06, 2009 6:10 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Wed Jul 29, 2009 8:30 pm
Posts: 1272
And if that fails, try hiding inside the SAFE for protection.

_________________
Image


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Sep 06, 2009 6:12 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jan 20, 2009 12:08 am
Posts: 4576
Location: Error
Broom time.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Sep 06, 2009 6:13 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Mon Jul 27, 2009 12:09 pm
Posts: 1507
Location: Place which lacks pooftas
BANANA wrote:
Broom time.


Sweep the floor with it.

_________________
ImageImage


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Sep 06, 2009 6:14 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Mon Jan 14, 2008 6:28 am
Posts: 9193
Location: 70s Anime Land
gigoergong wrote:
And if that fails, try hiding inside the SAFE for protection.


Okay.

Okay that's enough of that.

_________________
Image


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Sep 06, 2009 6:15 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jan 20, 2009 12:08 am
Posts: 4576
Location: Error
Ryushusupercat wrote:
BANANA wrote:
Broom time.


Sweep the floor with it.


The doctor will be.... SWEPT AWAY.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Sep 06, 2009 6:31 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue Feb 17, 2009 4:04 pm
Posts: 4706
Location: Here
Quote:
Use bloodied lint to distract his tyranosaur senses.

While he's ditracted, contemplate how FREAKING AWESOME a cyber-doctor T-Rex is.


Quote:
Either way. Use the INFINITY REVOLVER, aim at any place that looks like it might incapacitate him, or at least slow him down a little.


Quote:
And better yet, combine the INFINITY REVOLVER and ANTI-AIR MISSILE LAUNCHER to get infinite missiles.

Somehow.


Quote:
And if that fails, try hiding inside the SAFE for protection.



Quote:
Broom time.

Quote:
Sweep the floor with it.


All sorts of ideas for combat swirl around in that brain of yours. You ready yourself for the battle of a lifeti-

SMASH

Dr. Tyranibocular charges up to you and smacks you clear across the room into a wall with his tail. You hit the wall so hard it leaves a huge dent. Rubble from the ceiling falls down around you. You begin to lose consciousness.

"THEY ALL DIE SO EASILY..."

Everything... is going...black...











..................................................................................................














You slowly start to wake up again. Everything seems so blurry, and your head aches like it never ached before. You attempt to lift the rubble off of you. It takes some effort, but you manage to free yourself.

You are in a tremendous amount of pain. The room is more or less the same as it was before, but with less hostile-dinosaur-genious and more large-pile-of-rubble. Also, that jet-type thing looks like it's about to take off. The ramp-door thing used to enter it is still down.

NVENTORY:
ANTI-AIR MISSILE LAUNCHER, BLOODIED LINT, BUSINESS CARD, DICTIONARY, INFINITY REVOLVER, MOP, PIPE, PLANT, POISONED BROOM JAVELIN, SAFE, SCRAMBILONI'S CLOTHING, SCRAMBILONI'S WALLET, STAPLER, VARIOUS SNACKS (Eight)
EQUIPPED:
HAT, NAMETAG, TRILBY-ESQUE CLOTHES, WORN-OUT PENNY


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Sep 06, 2009 6:33 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jan 20, 2009 12:08 am
Posts: 4576
Location: Error
It's still broom time.


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 674 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1 ... 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 ... 45  Next

All times are UTC - 5 hours


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: Bing [Bot], Google [Bot] and 12 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
cron
Powered by phpBB © 2000, 2002, 2005, 2007 phpBB Group