AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Just this morning me and some mates were talking out back of our school smoking some cigarettes. When my great-grandmother drove by and looked right at me.
I have no idea if she was just in the neighborhood or what. But she saw me.

aw shit your grandma knows you go to school

street cred cruddled

i can't deal with movie posters and i don't know why, it's actually starting to be an issue

a few years back i ended up locked in a staring contest with nic cage on a poster and i had a panic attack and ended up almost fainting, then throwing up outside the theater

When I was in elementary school, I wrote a comic wherein the plot was that Osama bin Laden had built a time machine and gone back in time to stop the founding of America. The President, seeing that this was a situation of utmost national importance, chose the only man for the job.

That man... was a dinosaur.

Namely, Yoshi. As in, Mario dumps him into a pit to get an extra life Yoshi.

I only have four pages of art and like six of the script, but I found them today while cleaning my room and I had totally forgotten about them and wow is it terrible.

I mean, I still kind of like the idea, but dang is that a weird thing to make up. I can't believe 9 year old me did that.

Top level flirting: ask your crush about politics.

I'm the biggest loser now.

I took my dog with me to Petsmart today and he pooped in the parking lot even though I made sure he went before we left the house.

the day i brought my dog home he rustled a river (like bodaciously,) in petsmart and nobody would help us clean it

then i took him to petco a few months ago and he pooped a line all down the middle aisle and i didn't realize it for like 5 minutes

he's also rustled in the water bowl at the dog park, and regularly hikes his leg on smaller dogs

so don't feel too bad

I once, long ago, wrote the beginning of a pokemon fanfiction. I through it behind the drawers in my room. Centuries pass, one day my sister comes to visit, she happens to look behind the drawers for whatever reason. She starts giggling and starts poking at me like I would die of embarrassment seeing it. I, of course, had forgotten bodaciously everything about it at the time, especially since I used my brother's name on it. So I look over it, I ponder whether hoboes is the proper plural of hobos (hobos is correct, hoboes isn't), then she leaves, no laughs at my expense. Then like 10 seconds later the most darkest fucking horror I have ever experienced washed over me as I realized I wrote this shit and how lucky I was to get out of their alive. I think I almost threw up.

I was absolutely terrified of ECW as a kid. Like, I legitimately thought these dudes were killing each other on screen. My best friend's uncle had every PPV on tape and my friend would always try to get me to watch, saying how much crazier it was than WWF or WCW. As soon as he'd mention the blood, or the flaming tables, or the barbed wire i'd get squeamish and suggest we play N64 or something.
Looking back, I think I wouldn't have liked it that much anyways. I was a mark, I loved the cartoon gimmicks and dumb characters, wrestling without it would've seemed weird.


Muchas gracias.

I don't even watch wrestling like at all (unless you count botchamania) and I understand what you mean. Especially with the understanding that wrestling is "scripted", not "fake". Blood and extreme violence just looks like a pointless gimmick, though I think that way of pretty much all media.

I was talking with some girl who was really nice and the last things said in the conversation was a story about my mother's dog who was put down recently. Smooth.

On the way back home, I was driving with both my windows entirely scrolled down. At a red light, there was a guy on a motorbike to my left, and he asked me what time it is.

After he thanked me, instead of just raising my hand, I gave him a thumbs up.

next time give 'em one of these

The thing is, wrestling is all about pointless gimmicks. The violence in ecw was less about violence and more of a way of making up for a wrestler's weaknesses. If you weren't charismatic or maybe you lacked the raw in ring talent then bam, brute violence would make up for it. The magic of ECW was that dudes that wouldn't have gone any farther than the midcard were legends in ECW, thanks to proper booking, rabid fans, and devoted wrestlers.

And Botchamania totally counts.

Pretty much. New Jack sucked in the ring, but his brutality made him awesome. Also, the fact that he was completely batshit insane. You ever see that match in Florida where he shanked a guy 9 times for stiffing him, then jumped bail to another state? Now THAT is hardcore. I dunno, it just makes it more enjoyable for me to know that the guy Im watching in the ring could legitimatly snap at any moment and actually maim his opponent for real.