AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Fucking loved Lickitung sushi.



YESSS

I liked it when they ran around screaming

Oh yeah, and in case anyone noticed, no update yesterday. I've been, and still am, painting my room. There probably won't be one today either.

I love that running Rattata mini-game.

That wood-chopping one in Pokemon Stadium 2 was awesome, too.

Right, guys, so you know: since university is starting up again next week, and I now have an awesometacular girlfriend, progress is gonna be really slowed down.
...
Which is what I would be saying, except since I'm so good at my course that university actually leaves me with more free time, and since I'm in an internet relationship with a girl who loves this LetsPlay...
Yeah... I'll probably be upping it back to once-a-day sometime soon.



Hm. Well, I had done all that huge segment in one sitting. So when I get back to the game...

It feels the need to remind me that, amidst the entire situation that could best be described as "Saving the entire goddam universe", I did, in fact, use strength. Multiple times. Yes.


Hmm...? Wait, seriously? I can actually use my Poketch to check on my Daycare Pokemon... from an entirely different dimension? What the hell are quantum geniuses like them doing just raising Pokemon?!
Ah, the broadband companies probably pay them huge amounts just to make sure the tech never gets released!


Something questionably evil this way comes!


THE SHOCKING REVEAL!
Or, would be, if it wasn't on the flipping cover of the game!

Although then again, if I actually cared about reveals this LetsPlay would be full of OMIGOD A MYSTERIOUS 'BIDOOF' APPEARED!


Level... 47? Seriously? Cyrus had trouble defeating a Level 47 Pokemon?!

Anyway, my plan is, just like any other legendary, TO CAPTURE IT! Hopefully that won't result in, y'know, the universe ending.


Umm... huh. That was easy. Most opponents, y'know, actually fight instead of just running away!


"APRIL FOOLZ LOLOLOLOL I TRIKED YOU OMG AHAHAH! UR DED NOW."


...
Fantastical, it even seems to know Machineria's moves.

Wait, no, I'm looking at it the wrong way:
Machineria knows the moves of a god!


GOD-SMITING TO THE FACE!


Umm... wut?

Okay, I might be beginning to see why Cyrus had such a problem here.


Pokemon #3. Single epic-sized wild battles are what Blissey is made for!


Silly ghost Pokemon, twix are for- I mean, those attacks don't work on Blissey!


And it just so happens to be a Sunday!


Say... if a world is something dreamed of by a god, then.... I forsee problems...

Most notably, Blissey getting ridiculously fat.


Oh right. Giratina is Ghost/Dragon. Crap-in-a-sack.


Epilepsie actually gets useful! Well, for a loose definition of useful- while the halved speed and 1.5 x catch rate are useful now, it'll stop me from using Sleep on it, making it much harder to catch.

Meh, doesn't matter. Porygon doesn't last one round against a legendary like this!


C'mon Lickitung, attack it with...

Hm. Turns out that Tastebud's move pool? One attack that does nothing. Another attack that does nothing. A third attack that does nothing. And one attack that does 1/2 damage.
And is woefully underlevelled. And fighting a legendary.


The dog from Duck Hunt must be having a fiend day with that one!


Psychick... somehow manages to get it down to Very Nearly Dead! Which is excellent, considering that False Swipe doesn't work against him.


So now would be a perfect time for catching the giant bugger. POKEBALL, GO!


POKEBALL, BE INEFFECTUAL!

To remind, this is a legendary. And half of its moves don't affect Porygon. This went on for a hefty amount of turns.


Unfortunately, he won out this battle! Man, nobody told me forcefully bending a god's will to your own was gonna be this hard!


I am not taking my chances with Gardevoir!
The nice thing about facing Giratina is that half his attacks don't do damage to normal types. And Wild Pokemon choose their moves at random.


More of the same. By which I mean thousands of coins were wasted to no avail. Goddamnit!



I didn't screencap it, but this was after a really lucky streak of 6 Dragon Claws in a row! That attack just about does more damage than Roosevelt can recover with softboiled!


I revived her. I figure I didn't need to post step-by-step instructions on what I did.

I also revived Machineria. Just in case.


I also switched to Timer Balls. I figure the battle's gone on long enough.

Even if, at max necessary battle length, they still would only be as effective as Dusk Balls.
Well it is nice to have a variety!


Dragon Claw again? Y'know, I'm really suspecting that he's actually ran out of other moves to use.
I sure hope not, because if he runs out of Dragon Claw...



OH WHAT WHAT WHAT?!


I ACTUALLY SPENT SO LONG IN BATTLE?!


AND THE GOD POKEMON KILLED ITSELF?!


AHAHAHAHAHAHAH OH MY THIS IS REALLY REALLY RIDICULOUS!


AH.. HAH... heh.....
*ahem*
Now that I'm a bit more serious, let me say: SHIIIITT! I THINK I DOOMED THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE!


Wait, you say... it did that because it understood us?!
Hm, makes sense. It just thought "these are the heroes of this world are? He's been pissing me off on the verge of killing me for ages! Screw it: world's over!"


Not so much 'defeated', as 'went all Jesus on us'.


Umm... say wut?
Up until now, you made a huge point that you had to defeat it to make the world collapse.
C'mon game, at least make an effort with your plot!


In actuality, I think it was just that the writers sort of worked themselves into a corner, and assumed that most people would've captured it (which is true) which would make sense plot-wise (the Pokemon is captured and protected from Cyrus), so they just skipped out on trying to figure a way of having the Pokemon defeated be a good thing.


Dude, shut up about Spirit for five minutes! Get it into your head: I LIKE CAPTURING POKEMON!


THOSE SECRETS WILL BE DESTROYED!

Yeah, that's probably not what he meant. But still worth the chuckle.


Umm... isn't your whole plan to destroy this universe in the process?



Cynthia really does have an excellent use of vocabulary, wouldn't you say?


Oh, how utterly fucking convenient! There just so happens to be a portal right where the boss was, but we still had to go up a giant mountain and down a messed up Picasso world just to get here anyway!


Its... its not a book, Game. You don't have to describe these things if you can show them!


YES, THIS PLACE!!

Really. Even the evil emotionless guy was more charming than you are.


I don't know where that is, what it is, or why I should care. All I care about is that I want to be where the plot is!


Suddenly, I do not want to be where the plot is! Brrr, I thought I was done with that place!



...huh. The entire Dimension World was located... just on the right of Route 214. That would've been really convenient had I actually gone that way.




OH COME THE FUCK ON ALREADY! How bloody long has that place had a blackout for?!

Seriously, Game, you have been a huge disappointment to me today!


I like how, even after an epic battle against a flipping God, the Pokecenter can still cure my Pokemon from all damage instantly.


Lickitung.... just stay in the PC.


Welp, looks like I better get on with the plot. No matter how awful the place may be!


Brrrr.... I can smell the NPCs coming off of this place. And it's surrounded by Bidoofs too! This is pretty much the exact opposite of Wootinary!

WILL SOMEONE PLEASE FIX THE FUCKING FILTER?!?!

LAWNMOWER TO THE CONCEPT KNOWN AS THE FACE!

Now that's actually a funny use of a filter.

Wow, that actually works pretty good.

I'll read your Let's Play after one of the proletariats undos the filter. Right now it gives me a headache.

I predict this filter will last several weeks

What's it filtering exactly?
Oh nevermind. It's filtering t.he or the

Also, how long can you be in a battle man! Seriously, this is the first time I've ever seen a wild Pokemon be forced to use struggle!

the

And I've caused a wild Pokemon to use struggle on several occasions. Typically a legendary Pokemon at 1 HP which I've been throwing Ultra Balls at for nearly an hour.

The only reason I beat fantina was because of struggle. All I had left was Eevee ( I can't bring myself to evolve the daisies thing. It's just so cute!) and she still had haunter. Luckily I alwways keep a stok of 99 hyper potions with me at all times, so although I couldn't deal damage, neither could she. It was the most epic pokemon battle in the history of (my experience with) pokemon!

I dislike the filter. I can't read teh text anymore. And that typo was on purpose. We should make a new game where you come up with funny things to say using the filter.

I'd like to say "Its been a long time since I was here before", but I don't remember when that

actually was; I generally surpressed it from my mind!


Yeah... *sigh* yeah I did.
Can we just hurry this along, I've got some End Credits to watch!


Yes, yes, I know! Geez, this is taking longer than the end credits of DROD. And that was

made near-entirely by one man!


YOU'RE GETTING A HEART ATTACK! FINALLY!


Okay, see? Those guys? I do not care about those guys. Those guys have been nothing

but little bastards to me!


It is my one wish that I never have to see her, McPants, or another bidoof ever again!


So... ummm... hello? Credits? End cutscene? Story wrap? I just beat the big boss and the

evil ghost god Pokemon after him, isn't this game meant to be over now?!


Wait...
Oh god, please tell me I didn't forget that-


*sigh*
I somehow managed to miss out on that 8th gym challenge.

Welp, I do like doing 100% completion runs!


Fly, Staravia! Fly me to the next gym!


No, Staravia, this is not the... you suck!
I still don't see why you can't fly to cities you've never seen before; they're bloody cities,

they're not hard to miss!
Heck, you can't even fly me a little bit closer? I mean, why do you always insist on only

stopping in front of PokeCenters? Dumb bird!





Oh why must I be so obsessed with pointless ribbons?





Well FINALLY! They actually did something about having a blackout... in the middle of a

sun-shining day. I still don't know how they managed that.


Route 222? I'm sorry, did I miss something? When did it start getting into the Twenties?

Oh wait, I get it! The Game's pretending to be like real life; y'know, where routes aren't

named after the order you visit them! Aww, how cute!


FINALLY a new wild Pokemon! Man, its been ages since I came across one of those!


And of course, with new wild Pokemon comes with even more chances to screw up immensely!


HOLY CRAP, IT'S A... its a...

Actually, what is an Electabuzz anyway?


Oh, isn't fighting electric pokemon such fun?


No, I swear! It's the most fun thing you'll ever fun!


Aaaand about daisies time! Now, what is Electabuzz?


It's...an electric Pokemon. That's all it says.

GOOD JOB, GAME! GREAT WORK ON THE BIOS!


If Electabuzz was introduced in any generation other than the first, it totally would've been an Electric/Fighting type.

Dunno what that would make Magmar though. Whatever... he is.


OH GOD! OH GOD NO!


NO! I AM FINISHED WITH THOSE LITTLE BASTARDS!


Umm... I think everyone's sick and tired of penis jokes by this stage. Lets just skip the joke.


Heh. Now the base aroung Gallade's groin really is a- GOD DAMNIT!



More never-to-be-used Pokemon! ...okay, now I think I might have something of a complex for catching them.


Is... anyone else disturbed by the mark on its crotch?

Hah, betcha can't erase that from your mind! You'll never be able to look at a Floatzel normally again!


I got stuck for a name. Natch.


Its a... Wingull? Shouldn't... shouldn't you be at the start of the game or something?


Short summary:
Its a bird. That eats.


ORIGINAL!



Hahah, man, it must really suck for Chargedog to know that their are wild Luxios out here that're twice as powerful as he is!


Okay, y'know what? I have a serious problem! Seriously, I am done with trying to catch each and every Pokemon I see!


OH HOLY CRAP ITS A MAGNEMITE! IT MUST BE MINE!


No! Bad Karma! Don't kill off my Pokemon! No dog biscuit for you!


And, at long last, I have the Pokemon I decided shall be my sixth some many moons ago!


I really should've thought of a better Pokemon to have than a Magneton. Especially since, y'know, I already have an electric type.
Meh. Its not my job to worry about those kind of things, its only my job to beat up cute little buggers at their expense!


I like how the little screws at the bottom are apparently classed as its feet!


Magnemite... doesn't actually have Levitate as an ability. It does, however, learn Magnet Rise. Which is really handy, considering its double weakness to Ground types!


Aaanyway, I think that's enough slaughtering and enslaving wild beasts for my own amusement. Lets head back and level up mah Magnemite.


And, y'know, heal my own Pokemon from the brink of near death. I really wish they'd stop almost dying so much.


Aww, isn't it just sooo cuuute? Next to all those... far bigger allies.

Umm.

But y'know, a Pokemon's size isn't always correlated to its power. Right.... Porygon...?

I really should have stuck with Fangheis...


Why is it that, no matter where I seem to go on my adventures, I always end up back in this bog-hole?