AWKWARD ZOMBIE

In the field we have a plastic frame, you put a bag on it and do your business. So of course most of the platoon holds off as long as possible... and everyone gets constipated. Doesn't help that the food we eat is freeze-dried and if you don't add enough water you'll shit bricks.

Sounds better than having to dig a hole like they used to.

I'm dying, guys.
My poots make me want to vomit and my piss smells like month old garbage in the arizona sun.
help

Welp. I'm definitely sick.

Brown slime. We meet again.

I was really nervous about clicking that.

I'd rather have that actually, ever thought of how hard it is to refrain from pissing while you're on the can? Well, the bags we use are biodegradeable... in water. So you have to be absolutely sure you won't piss or the bag will just fall to pieces while you're walking to the trash can.

Guess who got her period last night? Meeeeeeee~ And right before I go on a flight on Friday. Joy.

Doesn't that make diarrhea the most terrible thing ever though?

If you have diarrea out in the field, youre pretty much fucked regardless of waste disposal circumstances

Diarrhea in the field means you get sent back to base instantly Having someoneinfect the entire batallion is a bad way to lose a battle
In addition, diarrhea is commonly caused by drinking F-34 (used as jet fuel and for running our tent heaters), which means you'll be pretty useless for the remainder of the field exercise. I know a couple of people who've done just that, a girl was trying to get into officer's school, after a couple of days without food (the "auditions" for officer's education is as much mental as physical, go without food for example.) she started hallucinating and ate the packed lunch she had that was drenched in F-34, spent the next two days on the toilet.

Why is ingesting jet fuel considered a common cause of diarrhea for your platoon.

is that really a question you want answered

think hard

Maybe they wanted rocket farts.

Last field exercise a guy managed to fill his canteen with fuel and drank it, if you fill fuel on anything, spill a little on your fingers and later eat something you get the runs. F-34 is the work of the devil, just too bad it works so well.