AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Did you hit something with it? Blow a hole in the roof? Break the bed posts?

are you entirely sure you didn't just do that?

because this is highly odd

You have a superpower.

Use it for good.

With enough practice you'll be able to create a sonicboom.

More like sonicbang

fuck why did i do that?! now i feel grossed out

Today I sniffed and all the build-up and blockage in my nose went straight to my throat. I looked at it in the tissue, and it was this gigantic glob of yellow and little bits of red.

Typical sinus infection

Oh god...

Every time i end up with a sinus infection, every morning for the next 3 days, i end up waking up an hour early just to rush into the bathroom to hack up some brown thing from inside my throat.

When I told my parents: "if it isn't green or yellow, it's not an infection"

I'm pretty sure this is where the phrase "if it quacks like a duck..." is supposed to come in, because it sure didn't feel like NOT an infection...

Mucus color isn't a reliable way to judge your health. That's an old wives' tale.

Even if its bloody?

Blood in your mucous can be from any number of things from a small cut in your phraynx to full on throat cancer. The key to illness is supposed to be how horribly it inconveniences you, or has the potential to. The issue i have going on in my nose right now, for example, is way too inconvenient to be normal health.

Hey Tumblr has a lot of cool artists on there I bet there's a whole bunch of awesome Warcraft art

...

golly those women sure do have large penises

It was draenei, wasn't it.

I thought dairy was supposed to counteract spicy food, not supercharge it into a maelstrom intent on charging through my digestive tract with enough speed and force to leave my asshole burning with the intensity of a star.