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With my luck, something like this already exists, but I'll share it anyway.
A while ago, I would play the streams katie has up while I would do other stuff, like play WoW or whatever. At some point, I decided to put some of the funny stuff I heard into a word document. I recently found that word document and its kinda funnier than I remember... ish... maybe. Either way, I figured I would share it here, and if people like it, I'll try to do it again with a little more effort. I doubt what I recorded is particularly accurate, but I didnt even record who said what all of the time. Please forgive the misspellings and whatever. either way, enjoy:
norrin: im the guest annoying voice today
katie: im the regular annoying voice.
norrin: sup flyer girl
katie: you left out all the X's in the name, how are we supposed to identify it?
norrin: the X's are silent
norrin: did you know that people tweet enough words each day to fill a million novels?
katie: what kind of novels?
norrin: very short novels.
katie: so like, 140 character novels?
norrin: i think 140 characters would be a lot to keep track of
katie: shut up.
norrin: my uncle lives in california, and has taken a great deal of joy in telling me how warm and comfortable and not covered in snow he is
norrin: do you have any ketchup
(long story short, no)
katie: what happened to the two ketchup packets that were on your shelf for like, a year?
norrin: soggy scorching cheese-fries
katie: thats the name of a new band
(norrin chewing sounds)
norrin: you can hear me chewing?
katie: yeah, cuz youre right there
norrin: oh sorry, i didnt mean to.
(keeps chewing)
norrin: its really good if it makes you feel any better.
norrin: super hot magma cheese oh my god OW (eats anyway)
katie: hes holding a scissors....
katie: yeah, a scissors... thats how you say it... thats the pronounce.. correct.. to... ...
(even though katie is probably thinking of magill forceps, which except for the way they are held, have no relation to scissors or cutting)
whos gonna catch me? not you, thats who.
What katie said = flash 7, which is a product from 2002
What I heard = flash '07, which is a product from 2002
norrin: do you have another (i couldnt hear)?
katie: no... that was supposed to be my breakfast for like, the next two months, and you ate half the box yesterday
norrin: who wrote this comic?
katie: i did.
katie: OW.
katie: norrin did.
katie: im having two problems... and a bitch aint one... except it is, and you're the bitch- OW
katie: i dont know the difference between march and may
katie: what, am i going to argue with the computer?
norrin: youve argued with stupider things...
norrin: like me
katie: how do you spell "accessories"
norrin: a-c-c... e...
katie: youre just looking at how i wrote it and are reading it back to me!
norrin: (suffering)
katie: whats wrong? are you okay?
norrin: no....
katie: need me to call you an ambulance?
norrin: no
katie: then SHUT UP
norrin: my face itches
katie: you better go catch it
norrin: my first dog died
norrin: because it was STUPID
norrin: it ran through lava
katie: oh i thought you meant your real life dog.. not your minecraft dog
norrin: no, my real life dog died of old age
katie: at least it didnt run through lava
katie: why am i so sleepy? is there like... a gas leak?
id rather be a dinosaur now rather than in dinosaur times
i dont think they had the internet
norrin: i work 5 days a week at a real job!
katie: i work 7 days a week at a fake job!
-is mac and cheese a color?
-yes
-what color is mac and cheese?
-yellow
-THATS CALLED YELLOW
norrin: having these brakes here are still more aesthetically pleasing than....
katie: hitting a wall?
norrin: (unsure what he said)
katie: what? thats.. i dont really wanna know about that
norrin: you told me you wanted to know...
katie: yeah but... ...so?
norrin: this dog is a terrible person
katie: probably because its a dog
-do you know what the recipe for sugar is?
-SUGAR.
norrin: LOOK AT THIS BRIDGE
katie: oh thats great you only had to hollow out a mountain to make it.
norrin: (slaps katie in the face around 10 times for no apparent reason)
katie: (doesnt give much of a shit)
norrin: (kisses katie in the face)
katie: AAGGH FUCK WHY DID YOU DO THAT?
norrin: why is cartoon network playing .....far.. fu.. fer.. fooo.. uhm...
katie: the wizard of oz?
norrin: yeah that.
norrin: my fingers are stronger than your whole hand! hahahAGGHOMGAHFAFOHAFIJF
norrin: why are you so mean to me?
katie: because its funny
norrin: a year from now you are going to tell me "remember when i told you i set off your car alarm? well i was gaslighting you" and im going to throw you out of a moving vehicle
norrin: stop setting off my car alarm!
katie: i only did it once!
katie: well, i only did it once on purpose.
norrin: a thing.
katie: what? what is it?
norrin: its a weird thing
katie: can you explain what it is? or anything about it?
norrin: no
katie: then shut up, i dont wanna hear about it
katie: OW GOD OW CAT OW OW OW OW OW HES BITING ME
norrin: he loves you.
norrin: if i was rolling around in toxic waste, what superpower do you think i would get?
katie: cancer.
katie: just wait for your birthday!
norrin: who knows when THAT will be...
-what is a catalytic converter anyway?
-a converter
-what does it convert it to?
-other cadillacs
-(mind blown)
norrin: when i am saying something stupid, i want you to pinch me
katie: why dont you acknowledge that you are saying something stupid when i say "youre saying something stupid"
norrin: because you say that all the time
katie: yeah but i always mean it!
-my brain doesnt have a filter
-did you try hitting it?
-yes.
-this is what has to go down tomorrow
-you have to do your resume and i have to do my last dynamics homework
-we should do them at the same time so that we can be miserable together
norrin: they were celebrating "no lost time accidents" at work and someone hurt their ankle during the celebration
katie: they should have just fired him so it didnt count.
katie: you only have to erase if you make mistakes
norrin: YOU ERASE MORE THAN YOU DRAW
katie: dont eat the chicken until im done drawing. last time you did that you ate the whole thing before i could have any
norrin: that was the plan
katie: i dont know how canada works
katie: if you get all the coins together, with all the presidents and stuff...
norrin: YOU CAN HAVE THEM MAKE OUT
katie: OW
norrin: sorry, i meant for that to be affectionate.
katie: it was affectionate... it just like, also broke my elbow.
-you criticize my hug before i even gave it!
-YOU WERE TOO SLOW
(after talking about torso boy)
norrin (country boy accent): boy, i got a torso!
katie: lots of people have torsos.
norrin: yeah but i got like three in my car
norrin: SAY LAH LEH LEE LIE LO
katie: LAH LAH LEH LEH LO.
norrin: say it in your cute voice
katie: i dont know what cute is
norrin: (whistling)
katie: wanna know whats not irritating at all?
norrin: (doesnt answer, stops whistling)
norrin: (sneezes)
katie: SHUT UP
you ignore me so much that even im starting to ignore me
norrin: you said to my cat "you should know better" then threw him across the room!
katie: i didnt say "you should know better"! (says nothing about throwing him across the room)
norrins mouth is like an S&M relationship, saying "stop" doesnt cut it.
turn that attitude upside down
what is the sound of zero people caring about what you say?
(blows raspberry)
katie: STOP LICKING MY FACE
norrin: PAY ATTENTION TO ME
norrin: you have a serious mean problem
katie: you have a serious face problem
katie: great, its a full moon, now im going to turn into an asshole
norrin: ill give you 20 bucks to spend a night in your basement
katie: why would i do that? i could just take 20 bucks from you anyway
norrin: i have 99 problems, and youre all of them
katie: dont put lava in my sink!
katie: you broke my sink again...
katie:
(RE: using google image search to find pictures of dragon age characters)
funny thing about trying to find pictures of dragon age characters on google image search..... most of them are porn
it just makes it difficult to know what everybody's armor looks like if they arent wearing anything
katie:
i dont have the attention span to talk over myself
katie:
i have some kind of problem that makes me hiccup for no reason every couple of hours, so yeah.. i hiccup without provocation. i dont know why. probably some kind of cancer.
katie:
my body doesnt produce barbeque sauce... WHICH IT SHOULD. Then i'd be pop flyin'.
katie:
(this is) for my fantasies of setting off a bear trap in my boyfriends face.... because i have those. i think everybody has those.
katie:
no, thats just a sound i make... its not a condition. OR IS IT
katie:
you're inconsiderate for not considering that.
katie:
norrin's job is to eat toothpaste... or something, i dunno, i never listen when he talks
katie:
i dont know... i guess im waiting for (someone)'s life to stop being terrible so i can move... i think itll be tuesday or wednesday
katie:
flash is being really laggy! daisies! god! i blame norrin.
katie:
fun fact: i can't draw lines
katie:
nobody understands me.. im a tortured soul... Dammit.
katie:
im not clicking any links and putting them up on the screen!
i have been on the internet long enough to know not to do that when i have a camera.
katie:
beep beep meow
katie:
because of the new zodiac i guess im a gemini now, but im gonna keep saying im a cancer, because cancer is cooler even though astrology is fake anyway
katie:
dammit... dammit... dammit... dammit... dammit... dammit... dammit... dammit... dammit... dammit... dammit... dammit... dammit... dammit... dammit... (attempting to draw a boob)
katie:
did you break a washer? how did you do that? what did you do? what happened? did it start like, spewing flames?
katie:
i would have to ask for directions, but then it wouldnt be a surprise.
katie:
*cracks knuckle* ow.
katie:
im not singing, im mad.
katie:
i cant afford to go to the hospital more than like, once a year
katie:
what? my recording is going to stop in 3 minutes? OH MY GOD ITS A BOMB
katie:
im at a stage in my life where i cant afford things
katie:
thats pretty much how doors look.... right?
katie:
i think a roombas punishment is its own existence. its a crappy vacuum cleaner on wheels. thats punishment enough
katie:
im tired and weary from a hard day of thermodymanics... and regular dynamics
katie:
apparently streaming makes me work really slowly, so THANKS GUYS
katie:
before i started making a new file every 25 comics, i had a file that had 100 comics on it. it would take about 20 minutes to load, so i would initiate the loading, go downstairs, make lunch, kick a cat, do whatever, come upstairs, and hope it loaded by then.
katie:
empire and age are two different words, stop trying to confuse me!
katie:
does that mean.... DAMMIT... yep... i hate everything.
katie:
e-mail me your spaghetti
katie:
Ta daaaa! Wait, that didnt really do anything.
katie:
Triangle? Thats not a sound!
katie:
when i get a chance, ill just post a video of myself screaming
katie:
H's only have two lines... unless you count the third one
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