AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Oh no. No no no. I don't want to believe that. I don't want to believe someone could be that stupid.

And yet I have to. It's Chris.

I get in touch with my feminine side by dressing like a girl.

Thing is, I'm female. I...Chris, WHY.

Chris's definition of "get in touch with my feminine side" was probably taken from some TV show. The person who told him to get in touch with it told him that doing so didn't make him gay, so he did this, which means that he wants to do it but still be straight.

I don't think it's gay to dress like a girl, honestly.

It's really weird for Chris, though. Chris is so homophobic that dick jokes make him uncomfortable.

And yet, he's admitted to putting things up his booty of his own volition. His response to "get in touch with your feminine side" was to put on makeup and buy a thong.

The hair is different though. He grew his hair out to hide the fact that he's rapidly balding.

Reading about Chris-chan is my guilty pleasure. I check this thread many times per week.

It makes me feel so much better about myself.

Is Chris blind to fat or something? Last time I checked, his mother looked like this.

Oh, about that. For once, Chris's drawing isn't horribly inaccurate idealization. Barbara used to be fairly slim, but she ballooned out in recent years.

EDIT: For the record, he drew that comic roughly seven years ago.

The crowning jewel of that picture is "THE ATKINS ESSENTIALS" in the background. Also the fact that she keeps what looks like salad dressing right next to what looks like some sort of medication.

At least the cat looks pop flyin'....

Cause its sleeping. If I woke up to that, I'd shit myself

Ditto. I always anticipate reading about whatever ZaNy AnTiCs! he's done that you fine people post about.

I've been really wanting to give you EXCLUSIVE INFO on Chris-Chan but he's never on PSN when I am.

Edit: I really hoped posting this would make him go online but nope.avi

Leave your PS3 and tv permanently on and record it.

From what I'm able to gather, Barb had a reasonable weight until she suddenly evolved into Snorlax at some point between the comic Chris drew for mother's day and the famous Atkins photo. There's a later photo that shows that she's actually lost the weight, and according to an eyewitness she looks as if she lost a lot of weight in a short period of time. This is generally assumed to be due to her colitis, which has existed since she discovered it while trying to sue a Chinese restaurant for causing her symptoms(she had assumed that it was just indigestion) a little more than a year and a half ago.

This knowledge surfaced when Chris tried to deny that his mother had caught AIDS. Why he thought everyone else thought she had AIDS is unknown.



The cats hate Chris. I mean seriously they hate him.

He did one video where he was holding up Kitty(one of their five cats, though two are assumed MIA or dead), and all Kitty did was hiss and bite and scratch. Chris seemed to think that this behavior is totally normal for all cats, so you can safely assume that all of the cats behave(d) this way. Why this is so is unknown, though negligence is probably involved.

I think I've told the story before, but during Chris's attempt to photograph Michael Snyder last year a woman called him a pedophile. Her exact words were "kiddie diddler", but Chris thought it meant "kitty piddler" and he took that to mean that trolls had started a rumor that he molested his cats.