AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Oh man what could it be, not like the thread title already told you what it is or anything.



Yes, an LP of Fire Emblem 6.
I'll be playing on hard mode.
Rather than screenshot every little movement, only the important looking ones will make it through. Dialogue will still be cut because otherwise I'd have multiple updates of just people talking.
When I'm deploying units, you can choose one unit that I wasn't already planning on sending and force me to use him/her. But that'll be a few chapters, when I actually have too many units to deploy at once.

Table of Contents
Chapter 1 Intro / Battle
Chapter 2 Intro / Battle
Chapter 3 Intro / Battle
Chapter 4 Intro

oh my god fuck this game i sucked so muhc at it

anyway yes fe lps are good

only deploy roy in every battle
in the early levels, dont move any other unit

That's what you should have called the thread.

Related.

The first update will arrive soon, as in I'm uploading stuff in a bit and then have to type up the script. Even with dialogue trimming I'm still at 100+ images, so expect a two-parter.

The following LP is presented in it's original Cinemascope format with no commercial interruption.







Always 1000 years, never something like 980 years.




They have Civ 5 while everyone else is still playing Civ 4.




A powerful military in a strategy game? I bet they’re the good guys.



How much lesser? Well…



These guys cultivate snow. That’s when you know you’ve hit rock bottom.



Whoa hold up game, Hector lives here, and you’re lumping it in with Ilia?




Who could have seen this coming?



This shot is only here because it has Hector in it.





It’s actually around noon.



See? If this was dawn, there would be shadows hanging along the ground, but it’s obviously high noon as nothing has one.




Eh, just typical bandit talk, just have the nearby village send someone at them.



The nearby village! Noooo!




Hey, you ran over my archer!



“Oh I don’t know maybe the smoldering ruins over there will fill you in”



Yes. I shouldn’t regret how lance ran over that archer. By the way, who are you anyway?



Strange, I could swear I had more than 20 something images for the first update. Must've edited out more than I thought.

use all the archers, archers are ballin

archer only play through

PLAYER PHASE


You seem pretty healthy for someone who was run-over. Go shoot someone.



People shoot of beams of light when they're hurt.



I didn't actually do anything here to hurt him, he just stared at me and strained his eyes too hard.



Strained so bad he can't even hit me.



I suppose I'll have Lance finish him off then...



SHIT A GHOST RUN AWAY LANCE.
OH GOD HE GOT YOUR HORSE'S LEG OH GOD.




What, you gonna put a forest in my way or something?



I can't hit him, the forest is in my way!



This can't be healthy.
He subsequently died.



The bandit, that is.



Now what to do here.





No, no this is not what I should have done here. I mean come on, 1 hp AND he hits me with the butt of his axe, while facing away no less?



Marcus isn't faring too well either.




Two archers, both leaving their foe at 4 hp. See, this is why I don't really like archers, always half-assing the job.
Oh a house let's visit.




Chicken butt?



No shit Sherlock



Wolt may have won the battle, but namelessenemyarcher won the moral battle of half-assing the job.



How are these guys living through an axe to the head?



Maybe I should have let him keep the sword you say? Naaaaaah, that can't be why he's missing so much.



See? Lance is lancing just fine, must be Jeigan's age.



I SEE YOU



Eh, I'll have worse. FORESHADOWING



Hmm, Roy is standing right next to a guy with 2 hp, so it only makes sense that I should...



Let the pony man do it.



No now fork over the cheddar.
(I forgot to screencap him receiving the cheddar)



Maybe you'd have better aim with an attack that isn't a headbutt.




Maybe I should, you know, heal Roy at some point This is why I already have a blooper reel in the works





Not that killing him was important to the audience, but there'd always be the question of, "Where did he go?" if he didn't die onscreen.
Anyway, baiting.




Baiting hurts.


I BET NOTHING CAN GO WRONG IF I ATTACK HIM
But no, I'd rather not risk missing with a 93% chance to hit, and then being countered at 42%. Too risky, especially when you consider the double RNG make it more like 99% vs 30%. Waaay too risky.



SO GO GET HIM WOLT.




Dammit Wolt, stop half-assing it.
Now Alan has to clean up after you.



He even went through the trouble of killing his ghost, something I don't expect you'll ever do.




His work is rewarded



Not shown: the rest of the baiting process.
I now have a low hp bandit, what to do with him...





DARE I?
Yes.



WHAT COULD GO WRONG?



OH SHIT WHAT'S HAPPENING TO MY BODY EVERYTHING WENT WRONG HELP



He just left after I spazzed out.
Oh hey a level up




GOD HATH FORSAKEN ME




Maybe he wouldn't miss if he stopped dancing.
Not pictured: Alan kill-stealing.




Getting shot at is apparently a very rewarding experience.



I can now double people I'm so fast.
Can Sonic the Hedgehog double enemies? Didn't think so.



Again, 4 hp. Wolt, is this some sort of coded message? Is this Numb3rs?



Alan kills another ghost, to ensure our team isn't haunted during our travels.



No point in even attacking it's so low.



Oh, I just noticed, they say daisies a lot. Maybe they use actual curse wor-



...nevermind.



Jeigan used Tail Whip.
It's Super Effective.



HEAVEN OR HELL
LET'S ROCK






So that's why they're dancing, because it physically hurts to watch.






Could I have had Alan attack first, then finish with Wolt? I could have. Will I ever do that? Hahaha, haaaa...
Even with that excellent level up he has less speed than Alan and less attack than Lance.





I SEE YOU THERE




Well that was easy. I just hope we have a different mission type next time, instead of another Seize the Throne victory. Hahaha, haaaa...






This goes on for a while.






Because I have to throw in a little bit of plot every now and then.





No, sire.




Do I have to take him?




"Um, no, I wanted you to escort me home so I don't get locked in a cell. NOT THAT THAT WILL HAPPEN OR ANYTHING."





Fun fact, it took 35 minutes (+10 for bloopers) to clear this chapter, and it took me 4 hours to make today's update.
Haha, haaa... It's gonna be a looooong journey.

NEXT TIME: PRINCESSES

OH BOY, PRINCESSES.

Good job, this has been pretty funny so far. Can't wait for future updates.

And yeah, Roy isn't a derpy little troll. This is very distressing to me.

Oh hey look an update to hold you over until I can get perfectly timed screenshots of battle and then only keep 1/4 of them.




So here we are.




Yes, where is the princess? I’m already 10 seconds into this chapter and still no princess.





“She’s definitely not trapped in the dungeon!”






I think she bought it.




See, not a dungeon. It’s a “basement room”.



No, sire.




Who would help her, though? Some ragtag group of adventurers? Where will she find- oh, right.



No one cares about your contacts, shutup.


*squish*


No problem, you found Merlinus’s contacts, maybe he’ll shutup now.



I see no problem claiming to be one of the bigger targets in a war to some stranger in contested territory.



Okay.





Dammit Merlinus, I'm trying to have a conversation here!




Dammit Merlinus, your “being shouted at” lured the enemy to us! Way to go.



We could’ve gone through here peacefully, but nooooo.



Well said, me.




Technically it was Merlinus, but… hmm…



And now, an intermission.


Be sure to pick up some chocolate covered axes, poproys, and other fine snacks in the lobby.

In the heat of battle, what else to do first but…



SHOPPING!



Weakest enemy in the game and he can’t even take out 2/3 of it’s health.



See, THIS is how you kill an enemy. With a lance through the face.



That shockwave would more likely hit if it was facing the enemy, Alan. Just saying.



Maybe Wolt isn’t the weakest unit... No, must not think anti Roy thoughts!



Wow, didn’t think the handaxe was actually, you know, his hand. Maybe he could hit better if he came over to me to swing it.
Wait, my badass senses are tingling
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-NLYxOsNLOk



“I would if we weren’t kinda surrounded by enemies.”



So badass he doesn’t even notice the soldiers around them.



I couldn’t time the screenshot but this guy? He missed when he attacked Merlinus. The big honking cart, he couldn’t hit it. Laugh at him!



Alan, you’re gonna be huge someday, a star!



I end the village and receive an armor slayer.



SPIRIT BOMB!



And he was never heard from again…



OH GOD WHY DID I SPIN SO MUUUUCH
Can our brave cavalier Alan survive an entire enemy phase with only FIVE HP?!



Yes, he can.



Can’t even hit a guy with his back turned.



Shit I think their axes fused together.



OH GOD IT’S HAPPENING AGAIN.



WHAT COULD GO WRONG



Oh well, just have Ward take out the oth-



Goddamit. DIECK!



Invisibility means nothing to someone who can see the invisible, touch the untouchable, row the row and fight the powah
For those of you wondering just what the difference between the similar units Lance and Alan is,



Alan is a Ghostbuster.



I wonder, do people in Elibe have laser light shows, where they just beat up a bunch of people and watch the lights?



His fate of missing was determined before he even threw the lance.



STILL HEALIN’



Roy miraculously teleports to the front.



No Ellen, he’s supposed to become a star, not have a star thrown at him!



AAAAAAAAGH



He just floating in the air, witch! Wiiiiiitch!



See guys, I’m not as weak as Wolt! Right? …Right?

BADASS ALERT. (Start replaying the music from above)



Ohmigosh ohmigosh ohmigosh he’s talking to meeeeeee.



“Listening to Merlinus talk about a badass requires actually listening to Merlinus, so no.”



“Mostly with Merlinus”



And so we did.
MEANWHILE



Bors slowly makes his way to the shop.



Merlinus holds down the fort.



His laziness comes in handy for training my weaker units. Yes, weaker than Wolt. Yes, that is very discouraging.



Just 3 more kills like that and she’ll level up!
…Why am I crying?



HIS MIGHTY JOURNEY CONTINUES AT MACH SPEED



Still too strong for Thany.



Perfect!
Now for something completely different.



HE CAN MAKE IIIIIIIIIT!



More babbying.



Dieck can carry a horse on him. BADASS.



WHY GOD WHY



HE’S DONE IT! Not in a million years will you see a play like this again, folks!



Swatting the air is a very rewarding experience.



Oh hey let’s try this



Hahaha, haaa. At least I’m still stronger than Wolt.



Marcus, be useful!



Good Marcus. Have a Jeigan treat.



MY FAAAAACE.



I SEE YOU HIDING THERE



Ah the joys of mercenaries. They do all the work, I take all the credit.



Shutup Merlinus.



Highness? THAT CAN’T INDICATE WHO YOU ARE AT ALL.



“Oh, like calling me highness hasn’t given it away?”



WHAAAAAAAT A COINCIDENCE!



WHOOOAOAOAOAOAOAOAOAOOOOOA!



“Merlinus, shut the fuck up already.”



“DAMMIT MERLINUS!”



Jesus finally. Now, back to princessing.





Okay Merlinus, now you can talk.



WHOOPS END OF THE CHAPTER GUESS YOU CAN’T TALK.
NEXT TIME:
...
...
...





...oh, right
LATENESS




If there's something strange, in the neighborhood
Who ya gonna call?



GHOSTBUSTERS!



If there's somethin' weird, and it don't look good
Who ya gonna call?



GHOSTBUSTERS!



DOODO DOODO DOODO DOODODO



I ain't afraid of no ghosts.

Okay, I want to link the updates in the OP. I don't know how to link a post. Someone help.

1: click the 'profile' button at the bottom of a post
it should show your 'profile'.
2: click 'search posts', and it show you a list of all the posts that the user has written
3: click the post subject of any post, and it should take you to said post. you can use the url from that page to link to the post

example

Either that, or click the little "page" icon right next to the "Posted: [Inserts Date and Time here]" for every post.