Y'know what today is? IT'S MAH BIRTHDAY!
....yeah, I still went ahead and made an extra-large update anyway, a day in advance. But I actually like doing these Elite Four episodes!
I needed two Max potions this time. ...I must be slipping!
And yes, I did re-PP Machineria. I think.
Oh...kay, that's totally not creepy at all!
Oh, right. That'd explain why the floor IS MADE OF FIRE!
Well, he could've just been a grass trainer, before his super-hot flamboyance burned them up!
Save an oddish: shoot a homo!
Okay, sorry, that was just awful!
Y'know, I never made mention towards his afro.
Although that's because IT PALES IN COMPARISON TO MIROR B'S!
YEAH!
Have
you punched a dog today?
Oh. Umm... fuck, I really hate Sunny Day! Powers up all fire moves by 50 percent! REALLY deadly for a themed Pokemon trainer!
Well punching worked! Pity though that it left a burn: burns are horrible for a Fighting Pokemon to get, because they reduce the damage of your physical attacks by half!
And Psycho Slash is a physical move now...
OH HOW USEFUL!
Seriously, I haven't met a wild Rapidash this entire game! And you can't run away from a Trainer Battle!
Oh GOD I hate Flare Blitz! Put it this way: You know Volt Tackle? This is the fire version of that. Yes, it does 120 power and 100% accuracy, with a 10% chance of burn!
The only plus side for me is that it does 1/3 the damage to the user, which means... it can kill off half my team before dying! Ugh!
The big plus side for me is that Blissey has A HUGE AMOUNT OF HP! Recoil is based on actual damage dealt, not percentage of HP!
Looks like an even 1-1 kill-off? WELL NO, HE HAS ONE PIXEL OF HP LEFT! FUCKER!
Oh, but it gets worse. Did you notice a lack of an item being used on Houndoom?
...yeah. This is really not a fun match!
Although recoil does mean that Epilepsie gets far more damage in than normal! I guess that counts for something.
Oh yeah, since people loved one-turn-dodge-one-turn-hit moves like Fly and Dig, they introduced Bounce. Works the same way, only.... with horses, for some reason.
Silly horse thinks he's Mario!
It's also one of those goddam moves that induce paralysation despite not being electric! God, how I hate them!
How is
a washing machine meant to be paralysed anyway?
I AM DUDE, EXTINGUISHER OF HORSES!
Class B Wootinary detected!
Okay, I really need to pull off a single Rain Dance and Machineria will utterly destroy everyone here! It all depends on Flareon not having a super-powerful move that-
Well FUCK!
Alright, I suppose I'll have to do this the equally-as-hard-but-a-little-slower way!
I find something highly ironic in this!
Remember, Overheat halves the user's special attack. Flareon just used it twice, and is probably going to use it again. Nows the time to use healing items!
This is actually the first time in the entire game that I've used a Full Restore myself! Although I think it's also the first time I've been low on health and with a status ailment, yet really do need healing.
Hey, I did say it'd take longer!
INFERNAPE VS GALLADE! A COMPETITION TO SEE WHO TRULY IS THE BETTER FIGHTER!
Or, that's the way it would be if PsyGuy wasn't utterly screwed at this point.
Well that was horribly one-sided.
Umm... come to think of it, Hydro Pump probably would've worked better. I only realised now that Ominous Wind is a pretty low-power attack for an end-game Pokemon.
Aw c'mon, he should be dead! Ah, these things never work out the way you want them to!
Riiight... we all know how well Roosevelt stands up against fighting Pokemon, don't we? I'm keeping the big guns!
Oh. Um, I was sorta expecting her to be, y'know, pummelled to death right about now.
Theeere we go!
Wait, CRAP!
Err... crud, this is my last Pokemon now. I should revive Psychick just in case.
Well that went badly! I'm gonna need a high HP Pokemon here!
Wait...
Oh, that's new! I honestly wasn't expecting a flipping MONKEY to be able to do that!
Okay, look, I'm using a bloody Full Revive already! Geez, this monkey is ridiculously blood-thirsty!
THEEEEEEERE WE GO! I should've just done that from the start!
That half-dead health shows that I really did need a full restore here, or I would've been SCREWED!
Alright, LAST POKEMON! And he's out of revives too! God, I hate Flint!
He also has the astute ability to make a bloody mess out of Machineria!
Which is odd, since he hasn't got any blood.
Oh right, why I'm using Roosevelt? Well, this Magmortar hasn't actually got any physical attacks! Pokemon like these are what Blissey specialises in!
Oh yeah, thing about fire trainers? Not only do they love Sunny Day, but also Solar Beam; which takes no recharge time if it's Sunny! Which is why I'm so glad that the effect passed AGES ago!
Nice thing about Solar Beam? It can be interrupted! Now for some good ol' lessons learned from Drowzee!
...man, those guys were WEIRD!
Wait, seriously? That's the amount of damage dealt? Holy crap, how tough is this guy?!
I ain't sticking around to see if Roosevelt can face him alone! Let's see if Machineria does better against an immobile opponent!
....apparently not. This does not look good.
......yeah, he's not surviving that one!
I should've done this from the start.
Oh GOD that was a close one! Apparently just because it's a special attack doesn't mean it doesn't do a helluva lotta damage!
Okay, this Magmortar really loves his Solar Beams. Which is odd, considering how much they suck when you can't use them in one go!
See? Look at how little damage it did! And that was after
two turns!
Okay,
now he's trying properly!
...which is why it's such a pity that his attack did utterly nothing. Softboiled is so very useful!
Well FINALLY! Gawd, that match took AGES to do!
Incidentally, when did Blissey go from being a Pokemon that could hardly do anything to being the Pokemon that's
the best on my team?! It makes no sense!
Oh god, you're attracted to my Pokemon too?!
Flint has the unique ability of being able to pronounce ellipsis.
Well that's what you get for LIVING IN A ROOM MADE OF FIRE! I MEAN SERIOUSLY!
UGH!
Oh woo, last member of the Elite Four, right here folks!
Oh right, this room is actually fairly subtle about the user's type (for a change). He's Psychic, in case you're wondering. And I think I have a little bit of an advantage over him!
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