AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Update pweez

Oh aye, I've just been waiting for the inspiration to hit. My comedic humor tanks are running low this week for some reason.

Just jump through the next map, you'll do just fine.

ALRIGHT BIZNASTIES
WHERE DOING IT MAN
WHERE MAKING THIS HAPPEN


Yeah, fuck that guy.


Whoa look at all this shit to kill!


Ka-BOOM, baby! I feel stronger already!


BUT YOU STILL CAN'T FUCKING JUMP UP CLIFFS, MARIO


Yes. Knock that fucker out. DO IT


OR HEY LET'S GET DISTRACTED BY A FUCKING FLOWER AND THEN JUMP ON IT SOME


KAKSN IS ALL I HAVE TO SAY ON THIS MATTER


Now may we please take out this stupid squatter?


Thank you. The jumping was probably unnecessary but whatever. It got the job done.


Which way to go? Hrm...


Alright that's cool dickass.


Shut up Mario, just shut your stupid face. It's one more fucking flower. LA DEE FRICKIN' DA.


SEE THAT'S WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU JUMP BLINDLY INTO SHIT YOU NINCOMPOOP


Well, at least you beat hi- WHAT DID I JUST FUCKING TELL YOU


What.. What the fuck..?


...
...
What in the everloving fuck of all things ungodly did I just witness?


Thank.. thank god we're back to.. not doing whatever the fuck he just did...


OH NOT THIS FUCKER


Yes, let's jump and chase the shit-flinging spike-fucker. That'll show him. Especially since he's TOO FUCKING HIGH FOR YOU TO REACH


See? And now you've gone and got ambushed. Dumbass.


Alright, time to fuck that other spikey dick's shit up.


>Aggrieve


A WINRAR IS YOU. NOW GTFO


Oh man, it seems while you were taking your sweet-booty time killing those dudes, two more appeared!

>Strife or Stealth?

Strife!

Go ninja by JUMPING!

It's an RPG, grinding required if you don't want your shit to be stomped.

Kill everything! It is the only way to get to the prestigious and legendary max level.

I will got tiger

You're Mario. You've saved this kingdom how many times in the past? You've gotta be like.... level 70 at least. Leave some enemies behind for Toad.

Kill them and throw their corpses at he boss ahead. 8===D Teach those dudes to be jerks. Jump on them often.

Vote Tally
Strife: 3
Stealth: 2

Strife it is, then! Update incoming, but don't expect me to show you the underling fights.

EVERYBODY OUT OF THE GOD daisies WAY
I'VE GOT A TOPIC FULL OF UPDATE, A FIST FULL OF CONTROLLER, AND A HEAD FULL OF GAME


Just another average day for Mario; jumpin' on shit, killin' dudes, and.. APPARENTLY FOLLOWING SPIKE-FUCKERS


I guess you didn't learn from the last time you tried to follow him.


I GUESS NOT


And now with your aimless wandering, you rustled off a Hammer Bro. Obviously schizophrenic, with the way he keeps talking about his hammer as if it were a person.


Oh yes, let's jump on him some. That should do the fucking trick.


See? Dumbass. Hope your head is as thick as you're acting.

<insert more jumping and rage at said jumping>


WELL NOW THAT YOU FINALLY KILLED HIM..


YOU GET TO KILL HIS rustled OFF BRO


JUMPING WON'T SAVE YOU NOW, FUCKNUTS


PAWNCHMOAR


How did I not see that one coming?


CAN'T JUMP THIS


About daisies fuckin' time.


Hell yeah. Maybe now you can burn their asses instead of FUCKING JUMPING


YES EXACTLY LIKE THAT YOU NUTSCRAPER



You are a dick, sir.


Ahh, finally; the goddamn town. Maybe I can restore my sanity.

>What now?

Talk to Luigi

Go masturbate in public.