AWKWARD ZOMBIE

the "Get your cockring off with your teeth" game

Jeeeeeeeeeesus



Jeeeeesussssss

ProtoType was fun to me because of how frustrating it got with the difficulty spikes. It took forever to down the final boss for me, too. I ended up going on the internets to discover that the only effective way to down him is the least effective method on any other enemy type. Nonetheless, the game was three ways of cruel and unforgiving.

Assassin's Creed. The controls were obnoxious and I hated how it'd refer you to "the right hand button" but refuse to tell you what key is bound to your right hand. From there, it'd hire you out to perform various arbitrary tasks before allowing you to finish the level. It's like the game was begging you to inflate your playtime with silly 100% completion. I had no motivation to do the "capture all the flags in 1 minute" minigame for the fifth time. Also, the only effective way to defeat enemies was counter attack. But all forms of enemies seem to have left their courage and balls at home, because it took them about half an hour to work up the will to attack me.

Luckily, the sequel improved/fixed all these awful concepts. So I didn't quit gaming.

First thing to I do in any new game is open the menu and look at/change the keybinds.

For the combat, counter-attacking is very effective, but is indeed to slow to rely on alone. Then you're just playing badly. Combo kills are the way to go. Once you master that, you're pretty much one hit killing everything. Attack when the enemy pauses, and predict when someone else is going to come in to take a swing at your back. Also, if you're good, it's great fun to kill a guard squad using only the hidden blade.

I have yet to master the hidden blade fighting.
I'm too busy with the Dagger.

Fuck the final boss.
Seriously.

Let's get this first sentence out of the way right now.
If games were people, I would go gay for Katamari games because I LOVE THEM THAT MUCH.
But the first game was hard, mostly because of how unforgiving the crashes are.
Make a Star 7 comes around and then you suddenly have a swan boat on wheels which is rocket powered moving a billion miles an hour in an integral part of the level. (Read: A FUCKING PLAZA)
Controllers were broken.

Also: Finding Nemo. I played for 2 hours, never got past the "swim to the manta ray" or whatever level. That is the game that cemented the idea in my head that no movie game can ever be good.
Ever.
Then Scott Pilgrim comes along and ruins that.

I beat it on normal.


The last boss took me like 30+ tries. But I was consistently getting to the last phase after a while.

What is it with developers that makes them think all a good final boss needs is to be difficult?

But then lo and behold, Bioware heard these complaints of ridiculously hard final bosses. And then they threw in the Human Reaper as a final boss.

What.
The.
Fuck.

So easy and he just comes out of the left field.

Well, generally the final boss is supposed to be the most challenging part of the game, as it generally makes finishing the game feel far more satisfying.

But I'm one of those crazy weirdos that likes ludicrously difficult games so my opinion is probably void.

But there's a difference between difficulty and artificial difficulty.
Most developers either are too lazy to put actual difficulty in or don't realize there's a difference.

The final boss in ProtoType essentially says, "To hell with your honed and practiced methods of combat! I WILL END YOU."

And proceeds to do it thirty to fourty times.

And then you use the Super-Throwing-Power (It has a name that I can't recall) and grab the missiles left lying around the carrier and proceed to blow him up by volleying the military's arsenal at him. Your Blade, Whipfist, Hammerfist. . well, your everything ain't got shit on playing quarterback with a missile.

I beat the boss on my second try, if only for the fact that I ran out of time the first time


just keep running around the ship and chuck things at him, be it missals, planes, or people.

No final boss should force you to scrap all your hard-earned skills in favor of something cheesy like just throwing shit around. They should allow any and all styles to be wielded, some weaker than others, but nothing that just nullifies them.