AWKWARD ZOMBIE

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 Post subject: Super Mario RPG: Legend of the 7 Fucks to Give
PostPosted: Tue Mar 13, 2012 9:39 pm 
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Alright!

Let's-a Play Super Mario RPG: Legend of the 7 Stars. And by Let's Play, I fuckin' mean Let's Play. You as the forum will dictate my actions as I play through this here gem of a game. I'll try to update consistently, showing off what I'm doing in between choices, and ending the post with the choice you guys will make.

Without further ado:

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They don't make 'em like they used to.

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Oh look, it's Princess Toadstool. The fuck is she doing in hillbilly land?

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Shit just got real. Real dark. Wonder what's happening?

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Of course. When in doubt, it's Bowser. Bastard, find someone else to harass!

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Dick.

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And Mario, somehow able to see giant red exclamation bubbles, emerges from his house.
Wait a second, the hell was Toadstool doing at Mario's place? I THOUGHT THIS WAS A KID'S GAME

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So now Mario does what Mario does best: Jump all the fuck around.

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Alright, let's play this sumbitch. >New Game

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...Shit. I didn't study for this; dammit, Mario.

>Name the save file!

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Last edited by Sol Reaper on Sun Mar 18, 2012 1:18 pm, edited 3 times in total.

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 Post subject: Re: Super Mario RPG: Legend of the 7 Fucks to Give
PostPosted: Tue Mar 13, 2012 9:50 pm 
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Fagballs.

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 Post subject: Re: Super Mario RPG: Legend of the 7 Fucks to Give
PostPosted: Tue Mar 13, 2012 9:56 pm 
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Bit of due process: I'll be using the suggestion of the first person to make one, but if you got ninja'd I can take a vote.

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 Post subject: Re: Super Mario RPG: Legend of the 7 Fucks to Give
PostPosted: Tue Mar 13, 2012 9:56 pm 
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Gobulcoque.
Winslow.
Terrykary.
Juiced.
Inuyasha.
Bragabond.
Coonsuit.

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 Post subject: Re: Super Mario RPG: Legend of the 7 Fucks to Give
PostPosted: Tue Mar 13, 2012 10:17 pm 
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Classy.

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This crap again? We just watched it! Whatever, skipping this.

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Welcome to fabulous Bowser's Castle! We've got lava pits, fireball sticks, and all the Koopas you can jump on!

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Silly Bowser, you shouldn't have done that. Mario will be expecting you to go to your own castle, numbnuts.

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...And he's jumping again. Why, Mario? Why? Do you feel an insatiable need to jump over everyfuckingthing you come across?

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The doors seemed to have opened by themselves. Don't do it, Mario! It's a trap!

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Maybe not.

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Let's just go through this door and.. The hell is that?

>Kill the mutated fucker or run past it?

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 Post subject: Re: Super Mario RPG: Legend of the 7 Fucks to Give
PostPosted: Tue Mar 13, 2012 10:22 pm 
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Kill em dead with JUMPING

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 Post subject: Re: Super Mario RPG: Legend of the 7 Fucks to Give
PostPosted: Tue Mar 13, 2012 10:49 pm 
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MARIO! THE FUCK IS WITH YOU AND JUMPING?!

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No.. You bastard, you better not-

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I'm warning you right now.. If you fucking jump again-

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STAY THE FUCK RIGHT THERE!

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GODDAMMIT MARIO I SWEAR THE NEXT TIME YOU JUMP I'M GOING TO RIP OFF YOUR FUCKING LEGS

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Oh. It's dead. Whaddaya know.

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Quit gloating, Mario. Don't you have a bitch to save or something?

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More of 'em? Slay them all. BUT GODDAMMIT IF YOU JUMP...

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MARIO WHY DO YOU INSIST ON- Oh, carry on.

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Such style~ *ahem* I mean get your fat booty moving.

<insert Mario killing two more waves of mutated Koopas in the same fashion as above>

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Look, more of them. I wonder if I can sneak-

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So much for that plan.

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Asshole. I would have expected better of you, Mario.

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Welp, kicked their asses; time to move on.

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HOLY SHIT I ALMOST DIED

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Nah, just kidding. It fell after I crossed it.

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The princess is up there, moron.

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There you go.

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No no no no NO! Mario, the fuck do you keep jumping for?! There was a perfectly fine wall you could have used to climb up and untie the princess.

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May as well deal with Bowser while we're at this whole crack-addiction-like fascination with jumping.

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>Who do I attack and how?

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 Post subject: Gonna beat it 5 times over.
PostPosted: Tue Mar 13, 2012 11:00 pm 
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Suggestion 1: KILL THEM ALL WITH FISTS OF FURY!
Suggestion 2: play jump rope with the chain chomp.

And what fortune! I just recently got myself a physical copy of this game.

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 Post subject: Re: Super Mario RPG: Legend of the 7 Fucks to Give
PostPosted: Tue Mar 13, 2012 11:06 pm 
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Well, since there's two suggestions, I'll leave it to a vote amongst the others. Whichever suggestion gets the most votes by page 2 is the one I go with.
This is in no way a stalling tactic so I can stop stretching the page.

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 Post subject: Re: Super Mario RPG: Legend of the 7 Fucks to Give
PostPosted: Wed Mar 14, 2012 3:06 am 
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Kill that bitch for fucking Bowser.

Fuckin, whore.

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 Post subject: Re: Super Mario RPG: Legend of the 7 Fucks to Give
PostPosted: Wed Mar 14, 2012 8:42 am 
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Grind your agility up to 95 or whatever and attack Toadstool.

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 Post subject: Re: Super Mario RPG: Legend of the 7 Fucks to Give
PostPosted: Wed Mar 14, 2012 9:08 am 
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I say attack the chain and kill him with the resulting falling damage.

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 Post subject: Re: Super Mario RPG: Legend of the 7 Fucks to Give
PostPosted: Wed Mar 14, 2012 9:47 am 
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Attack the chain thus avoiding Bowser's unfortunate bad breath attribute

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 Post subject: Re: Super Mario RPG: Legend of the 7 Fucks to Give
PostPosted: Wed Mar 14, 2012 10:48 am 
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Please note that Toadstool is not an available target because of shitty game limitations.

So Liraxus and Etank may want to resubmit their votes.

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Last edited by Sol Reaper on Wed Mar 14, 2012 12:08 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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 Post subject: Re: Super Mario RPG: Legend of the 7 Fucks to Give
PostPosted: Wed Mar 14, 2012 11:08 am 
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No thought there was a bug that if you get your speed up high enough toadstool will become a target

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