AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Wait, Ganondorf has a kid? I'm not that up on LoZ lore, but I'd think I'd know that at least...

No, Bowser has kids. Ganondorf is the guy on the right.

I mean, he probably does though. The dude is like a million years old, and has ruled the world many times over; surely he's gotten his freak on a fair number of times. And despite his age, he presumably never became, uh, impotent. Because triforce of power. (Get it?)

So I'm sure there have probably been dozens of Hylian maidens popping out little Ganondorf Juniors. But maybe he has them all systematically killed as babies, to keep them from growing up and taking his throne. That sounds like a Ganondorf thing to do.

He's also, in at least one incarnation, been the only dude born of an all lady race who've decided that whenever that happens, the dude is king. Doesn't necessarily mean anything, but usually kings have kids. It's like their one job.

Or~ because he's actually the avatar of Ganon which is personified as a pig, a commonly used symbol for male chauvinism, he's a virgin king. The attempts to steal the triforce are all just a power play to get some.

Well, he's only had 2 so far. Four Swords Adventures had his one reincarnation, and every other LoZ is the same Ganondorf (of course with the timelines branching out from OoT) just unsealed/brought back from the dead (not the same as being reincarnated).


What do you mean by this? Ganondorf was born Gerudo first, and then he turned into Ganon later using the Triforce of Power.

If anything he's the avatar of Demise. Doesn't strike me as someone who Fucks either way.

I mean technically Ganondorf is just Demise reborn who turns into Ganon after he find the Triforce. But we're getting offtopic here.

More technically Ganondorf is an incarnation of Demise's hatred against Link and Zelda, not a reincarnation of Demise himself.

In conclusion:

Isn't the Ganondorf from Windwaker a reincarnation? I mean, adult Link killed him, and he came back later when there was no hero to stop him. But didn't he go on about the plight of the Gerudo people during his boss battle? Was he just born Gerudo again or something?

Ganondorf is born in OoT, sealed at the end of the game, escapes somehow in Wind Waker's backstory, is sealed again by the gods, escapes again somehow, and then is stabbed in the head (which makes him turn into stone for some reason?) at the end of Wind Waker.

Or maybe a time travelling Link warned the Royal Family so they tried to execute Ganondorf, failed, sealed him somewhere else, then he came back and got killed by Link? Or maybe that could be some other Ganondorf.

Then you have a different Ganondorf in ALttP's backstory, who is the leader of a gang of thieves, stumbles into the Sacred Realm, finds the triforce, tries to take over all of Hyrule, gets sealed in the Sacred Realm by the seven sages, tries to escape using Agahnim and the sage's descendants, and gets killed by Link in ALttP. Well, nearly killed; he tries to come back again, but gets finished off for good by a hero from Earth (our planet).

Then you have another Ganon who attacks the small kingdom in the larger land of Hyrule, steals the triforce of power, kidnaps Zelda, and gets killed by Link at the end of Legend of Zelda. His minions seek Link's blood to resurrect him in AoL but presumably fail.

Twinrova (some version of) attempts to resurrect one of the Ganons or Ganondorfs at some point; not entirely clear which, but it doesn't matter too much.

Then there's another Ganondorf who is one of the male Gerudos born into the tribe, takes in the darkness from a sealed trident (presumably belonging to one of the other Ganons) which causes his darkness to awaken, and gets sealed into the Four Sword.

And there's Calamity Ganon, who in the distant past was defeated by an army of Guardians and four giant robots, but came back and corrupted the Guardians and robots, but then was sealed by Zelda and got killed by Link and the robots.

And Demise, who seems to be the progenitor of the line, a demon king who gets killed but curses peoples' descendants yada yada yada.

And then Ganon is revived in Breath of the Wild, but dunno where that falls.

Making the games related was a mistake.

Wibbly-wobbly, timey-wimey... stuff.
Got it.