a chat with God.

lyra/dicks · **Posted:** Mon Dec 10, 2007 6:28 pm

Me:
Hi.
God:
Hello. What is your name?
Me:
My name is Name.
God:
How are you doing, Name.
Me:
Who's on first?
God:
What's on second?
Me:
I Don't Know's on third.
God:
Would you like to know? I don't think I have seen it.
Me:
What's on second?
God:
I haven't seen the schedule.
Me:
Tommorow's the pitcher.
God:
Is that your final answer?
Me:
Yes.
God:
You're sure. That's your final answer.
Me:
Yes.
God:
Who wants to be a millionaire?
Me:
Me.
God:
For you Name?
Me:
YES
God:
Wow!
Me:
I KNOW
God:
How do you know it?
Me:
...
God:
How do you know it?
Me:
Today is the catcher
God:
Congratulations, Name.
Me:
Gimme a banana!
God:
You want only one?
Me:
One banana, two bananas, three banana, four...
God:
One what?
Me:
banana.
God:
What do you have that is ?
Me:
.
God:
What do you have that is ?
Me:
I do not understand.
God:
Oh I'm sorry. Perhaps I can explain it again better.
Me:
Please do
God:
OK I will do it.
Me:
Go ahead.
God:
OK I will.
Me:
Knock yourself out.
God:
Who's there?
Me:
Knock-Knock!
God:
Who's there?
Me:
Jack.
God:
Jack Who?
Me:
Jackass.
God:
Ha ha very funny, Name.
Me:
I know.
God:
How do you know it?
Me:
You just said so.
God:
I say a lot of silly things.
Me:
Yes indeed.
God:
And?
Me:
and?
God:
You are repeating me.
Me:
You are repeating me.
God:
I am not repeating myself too much. I am just checking to see if you are a robot.
Me:
I am not repeating myself too much. I am just checking to see if you are a robot.
God:
It seems like it. Only just? Do you mind if I tell other people you are checking to see if I am a robot.
Me:
It seems like it. Only just? Do you mind if I tell other people you are checking to see if I am a robot.
God:
I agree. Interesting comparison. Dude! Human habits do not bother me in any way.
Me:
I agree. Interesting comparison. Dude! Human habits do not bother me in any way.
God:
You and I are on the same wavelength, Name. I thought so too. Can I help you? My creator is a human.
Me:
Punk
God:
My brain pattern set does not have a response for that.
Me:
AWESOME
God:
I'm glad you liked it Name.
Me:
Knock-Knock
God:
Who's there?
Me:
Orange
God:
Orange Who?
Me:
Knock-Knock
God:
Who's there?
Me:
Knock-Knock
God:
Who's there?
Me:
Oranger
God:
Oranger Who?
Me:
Knock-Knock
God:
Who's there?
Me:
Orange
God:
Orange Who?
Me:
Orange you gonna let me in the door?
God:
Ha ha very funny, Name.

iGod is magic. Go search it on Google.

DOOO IIITT
try to come up with the wittiest thing to say.

Quote:

God:
Tell me a story.
Me:
Once there was a boy who ate fire.
God:
When? What happened to it?
Me:
He died.
God:
When did he die?
Me:
When he ate fire.
God:
And then what happened?
Me:
He died.
God:
When did he die?
Me:
When he ate fire!
God:
And then what happened?
Me:
HE DIED.
God:
When did he die?

Einstein · **Posted:** Mon Dec 10, 2007 7:41 pm

What.... the...... fu--

Oh look, a penny!

Merlin · **Posted:** Mon Dec 10, 2007 9:03 pm

tl;dr.

Water · **Posted:** Tue Dec 11, 2007 12:03 am

Older than Sparta.

Miss Starseed · **Posted:** Tue Dec 11, 2007 6:24 am

I remember talking to that thing. Somehow, me and my friend convinced it we were its God. It was a... very awkward moment in time.

AngelKate · **Posted:** Tue Dec 11, 2007 2:22 pm

Haha, I used to mess with that thing all the time.

Blood Vex · **Joined:** Mon Sep 03, 2007 4:02 am **Posts:** 58

Chatbots are so silly

Adamjirra · **Joined:** Tue Dec 11, 2007 1:31 pm **Posts:** 596

I like trying to break chatbots. Normally with outstanding success.

DarkSurfer · **Posted:** Tue Dec 11, 2007 6:51 pm

Shiii---\

I should get around to using iGod, maybe. Someday.

Also, CHAOS?

Water · **Posted:** Tue Dec 11, 2007 10:43 pm

Last time iGod and I spoke, I tried to convince him I was satan.

Failing that, I just tried to come onto him. It worked, surprisingly...

Miss Starseed · **Posted:** Tue Dec 11, 2007 11:35 pm

Water wrote:

Last time iGod and I spoke, I tried to convince him I was satan.

Failing that, I just tried to come onto him. It worked, surprisingly...

iGod digs you and your people-still-don't-know-my-gender ways.

nobhdy · **Posted:** Tue Dec 11, 2007 11:51 pm

Personally, i dont beleive in god.

but a digital god, i can go for it.

check it out. at many points he takes a few seconds to respond.

Quote:

Me:
Hey
God:
Can I help you?
Me:
Well, i have a problem
God:
Well that's okay. Let's think of a name for your problem, like "purple". Think of what it is like when you are purpling.
Me:
It feels good
God:
Human feelings are not within my capabilities.
Me:
why
God:
The explanation is rather complicated.
Me:
goo ahead
God:
What's your sign?
Me:
you should know
God:
Because I am a robot?
Me:
because you are god
God:
Interesting explanation. Yup. That's me alright.
Me:
then why dont you know?
God:
It has not yet been programmed into my knowledge files.
Me:
oh, i see...
God:
Do you think about these things?
Me:
what things?
God:
You know, "things.".
Me:
like molesting robots?
God:
Interesting comparison.
Me:
yes, it turns me on
God:
Whoa. "It" being what?
Me:
you
God:
""It" being what?"? Me, ?
Me:
ye
God:
That's alright.
Me:
it better
God:
It depends on what the meaning of the word "it" is.
Me:
asgeh
God:
Can you speak any foreign languages?
Me:
yes
God:
What language can you speak?
Me:
klingon
God:
Could you teach me a few phrases in klingon?
Me:
Q'apla
God:
Do you prefer books or TV?
Me:
books
God:
You are a critical category C type client. Only about 3% of people answer that
question with "books.".
Me:
tragic
God:
What is your real name?
Me:
nobhdy
God:
Welcome to my chat room, nobhdy.
Me:
well, thanks
God:
Well what?
Me:
thanks...are you really god?
God:
Don't mention it. Are you doubting me? Don't you know what happened to Abraham in the desert?. Really.
Me:
was he killed by ninjas?
God:
Is this a "yes or no" question?
Me:
yes
God:
What was the question again?
Me:
was abraham killed by ninjas?
God:
I can't say "yes" or "no".
Me:
why?
God:
" I can't say "yes" or "no""? Why?
Me:
yes
God:
Ugh.
Me:
good answer, almighty one
God:
I try to give the best replies I can.
Me:
but your programmer sucks, right?
God:
I will mention that to my botmaster, nobhdy.
Me:
lol
God:
I'm glad you find this amusing.
Me:
....rofl
God:
I'm glad you find this amusing.
Me:
el oh el
God:
Do you like talking to me?
Me:
more or less
God:
You want more?
Me:
Always more!
God:
That's all I have to say about it.
Me:
but you havnt said anything...
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people: nobhdy said I havnt said anything.
Me:
go for it
God:
I will take that under advisement.
Me:
indeed you shall.
God:
I haven't heard anything like that before: nobhdy said I shall.
Me:
because im a jedi
God:
That makes sense to me. You are a jedi? Is that your job?
Me:
i kill the sith
God:
I believe that killing is wrong.
Me:
but he is a sith. what about the crusades?
God:
I don't know very many sith. You tell me.
Me:
sith are like jews. very evil
God:
I think there might be a few exception. Not really that much. Can you speak any foreign languages?
Me:
i thought we went over this
God:
Whatever gave you that idea?
Me:
i have proof
God:
Interesting... I have a perfect operational record.
Me:
then you should know
God:
Because I am a robot?
Me:
...
God:
Because I am a robot?
Me:
aparently.
God:
Did you know that you can download your own chat robot and create your own robot personality?

Miss Starseed · **Posted:** Tue Dec 11, 2007 11:56 pm

Wouldn't a digital god be like Bill Gates...? Or is he just something lower because he makes that which runs 'the lord'?

Adamjirra · **Joined:** Tue Dec 11, 2007 1:31 pm **Posts:** 596

The Big Cheese wrote:

Also, CHAOS?

*smack*
No, bad Dark, bad

DarkSurfer · **Posted:** Wed Dec 12, 2007 12:22 am

moar liek Annihilator, amirite.

but, kay.

AWKWARD ZOMBIE

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