AWKWARD ZOMBIE

So! This is the place to go to if you're interested in German. I'm going to try to teach y'all a bit of the language. Everyone who's interested can feel free to contribute, who really wants to learn the language is advised to contribute. People who already know German are also invited to help me pull this off.

List of lessons
Lesson 1: Pronouns and "be" (in this post)
Lesson 2: articles and nouns (jobs)
Lesson 3: Numbers
Mini Lessons in cases: here,and here.
Lesson 4: places and things and how to ask about them

Let's not beat around the bush any longer and start with the first lesson.

Lesson 1: Pronouns and "be"

Yeah, something easy for the beginning that most of you who are interested probably already know, but we have to start somewhere, don't we? I'll just list the words in the following order:

English German voiceclip

Okay? Okay.

Pronouns

I...............ich ............. listen!

you.......... du...............listen!

he........... er................listen!

she.......... sie...............listen!

it ........... es...............listen!

we ......... wir...............listen!

you ........ ihr...............listen!

they ....... sie...............listen!

That's the pronouns, your best friends. Learn them, practice them, know them.

But pronouns alone won't helpf you of course. You'll need verbs, nouns, adjectives and whatnot to make coherent sentences and I made it my duty to show them to you. So we'll start with the easiest and at the same time hardest verb there is. "be". Why hardest? It is irregular. Like in most common languages. Why? Dunno. When we come to regular verbs I'll give you a list with rules for conjugation, but we don't need them now in the first lesson.
German verbs, all of them, change how they're written and pronounced according to the pronoun they're referring to. That's what the next list is about.

"be"

be.......................sein....................listen!

I am....................ich bin.................listen!

You are................du bist................listen!

He/ she/ it is.........er/sie/es ist.........listen!

we are.................wir sind..............listen!

you are................ihr seid...............listen!

they are..............sie sind...............listen!

And that's that.
With that, you can already say what your name is. Just say "Ich bin <name>." It isn't the formal way, but that's how most people around here say it when asked anyway, so yeah.
And that already concludes our very first lesson. That wasn't so hard, was it?

This is great

I like this

I know. I try making this a crashcourse for starters. I can't teach 10000 words in here, I expect my students to learn words themselves as soon as they understand the basics of how to work with them.
But just to give a prospect, a friend of mine went to Japan for a year and they went through the whole Japanese schoolbook for beginners in 8 months or so and she is now daisies good at it.
I have the same book and I will try to use some of the things out of it for my German classes here.

Oh my God! Thank you so much for making this thread!

Danke schon!

Next post needs to be a dictionary of all the dirty words.

o\

what is the exit off of a highway in German??

Ausfahrt?

pfffft you said it

W-was there a joke in there somewhere?

Fart joke?

Kira u so thilly~

I believe it sounds like "booty farts"

:U Oh Schatz, You're so lovely~

But... 'Aus' isn't pronounced like booty at all.
My fore-knowledge of German prevented me from getting this joke right away.

I call being substitute teacher when D-Vid is unavailable.