AWKWARD ZOMBIE

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 Post subject: Bad Jokes
PostPosted: Tue Feb 24, 2009 1:17 am 
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For example, in my japanese class today, one of my classmates said: "Senseis, they're sensational!"


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PostPosted: Tue Feb 24, 2009 1:25 am 
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BAD JOKES? MORE LIKE BAD TOPICS.

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PostPosted: Tue Feb 24, 2009 1:32 am 
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Location: I am up in your Brills.
So, a drummer is driving to meet his band at a gig. But, because he's a drummer, he's late.

As he looks for a parking spot, he notices that the only free spaces are the handicap spaces. He parks in one, and leaves a set of drumsticks on the dashboard, instead of a sign.




He didn't get a ticket.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Feb 24, 2009 1:38 am 
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What do vegetarian zombies say?

--GRRRAAAIIINSSS....


How many Dragonball Z characters does it take to change a lightbulb?

--Only one, but it'll take about six episodes.


:awesome: ..... :? .... :colbert:

Blame my friend for those.

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'Holy Crap What the Fuck' and other magnificent tales.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Feb 24, 2009 2:13 am 
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FMAWolf wrote:
What do vegetarian zombies say?

--GRRRAAAIIINSSS....


How many Dragonball Z characters does it take to change a lightbulb?

--Only one, but it'll take about six episodes.


:awesome: ..... :? .... :colbert:

Blame my friend for those.


Your friend sounds like mr. :awesome:


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Feb 24, 2009 2:53 am 
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Quote:
Why did Princess Diana cross the road?

[spoiler]She wasn’t wearing a seatbelt.[/spoiler]


Quote:
A man took his Rottweiler to the vet and said to him, "My dog’s cross-eyed. Is there anything you can do for it?"

"Well", said the vet, "Let's have a look at him." So he picks the dog up by the ears and has a good look at its eyes.

"Well," Says the vet, "I'm going to have to put him down."
"Just because he's cross-eyed?" said the man.
"No, because he's fucking heavy," said the vet.


Quote:
Guys, can you help me?

I loaded 'Colin McRae's Helicopter Simulator' onto my PC, but it keeps crashing!

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Feb 24, 2009 3:35 am 
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So two guys walk into a bar, though I'm not sure why I'm telling you of such an ordinary and common occurence.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Feb 24, 2009 4:06 am 
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A dyslexic man walks into a bra.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Feb 24, 2009 11:12 am 
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Defenestrator2.0 wrote:
Why did Princess Diana cross the road?

[spoiler]She wasn’t wearing a seatbelt.[/spoiler]


Nice.

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Last edited by Merlin on Tue Feb 24, 2009 11:12 am, edited 1 time in total.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Feb 24, 2009 3:31 pm 
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Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducked.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Feb 24, 2009 4:36 pm 
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Jews.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Feb 24, 2009 6:25 pm 
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There's a pub that claims it can make any sandwich you request.

A man walks in and says, "I want an alligator sandwich- and make it quick!"



Two snare drums and a cymbal fall down a cliff. Bah-dum-shhh.



Warning: Dead baby joke ahead.
[spoiler]What's worse than five babies nailed to a tree?
One baby nailed to five trees.[/spoiler]

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Feb 24, 2009 6:32 pm 
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Muffinbuster wrote:
Warning: Dead baby joke ahead.
[spoiler]What's worse than five babies nailed to a tree?
One baby nailed to five trees.[/spoiler]
What the fuck


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Feb 24, 2009 6:34 pm 
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^^Wow, we really do attract upstanding members of society.

Anyways, a man walks into a bar, and pulls out of his pocket a tiny man, and a small piano. The tiny man walks up to the piano and starts playing it.

"Wow," says the bartender. "Where did you get him?"
The man says "I got him from a genie. Here, you can try if you want". He hands the bartender a genie lamp.

The bartender rubs the lamp, and a genie comes out. Immediately the bartender says "I wish for a million bucks!" The genie dissapears, and a million ducks appear in the bar.

"Hey, what the hell? I asked for a million bucks, not a million ducks!"

The man says back, "do you think I asked for a twelve inch pianist?"

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Feb 24, 2009 8:34 pm 
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Muffinbuster wrote:
There's a pub that claims it can make any sandwich you request.

A man walks in and says, "I want an alligator sandwich- and make it quick!"


Don't you mean snappy? :colbert:

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