AWKWARD ZOMBIE

H̴̶̰͚͍̟̳̩̹͖̫̔̆̈́͗̐͛̉̂͜A̿ͮ̋̆ͤ̈̊̃̋ͧ͊͌ͦ҉̵̷̨̛̼̦̙͕̫͙̰V̷͚̲̳̠̻̻̤͓͚͉͍̻͙̬͕̦͓̝͌ͥ̈͐̓ͤ̿̆ͨ̃̎̓́̀̚̚͢͡E̷̡ͤ̑̍̎ͥ̐̊ͫͤͪ̀̍͊̀͢҉̬̲̰͓̫̥̰̲͓̱͚̺̘ ̧̢͍̫̗̼̺̞̻̗̙̪̼͔̱ͮ̿͆̂͂͊ͤͪ͘͟͡Yͦ̏͋͒̾̊͊̆̋̓ͯͮ̿ͤ̚҉̴̧̩̯͕͚̯̥͔̺͇O͒ͭ̂͆̾̑͂̅̈́͂̾̀̓͒ͥ͒̅̚͏̠̭̞͔̟͎̳͉͟͢U̩͖̪͇͖̱̞̟̟̙̘̓̅̆̎̉̊͊ͭ̑ͦ̔͞ ̷̡̛̝̻͈̙̫̭͔̺̙͎͍̠̭̭̩͕̗ͦ̆̈́͐̔̄̿ͮͮ͛̉̌̍ͣͯ̀͆͡B̨͔͍͈͓͓̞͎͉̠͇͙̘̘̠̒̈̅̃̀̇̄ͦ̈̈́ͣ̽͆̚͘E̵͇͉̱̜͖̳̰̠̙̱͕͎̘̝̲̋ͤͩ̓̀͜͝E̪̝̗̗͖̥̳̝̣͙̹͙̱̟̬ͩ̔̿̂ͦ̄̑ͥ̂̆̐͋͛̉̑̋̐ͦͦ͜͟N̵̨̡̠̹̣̺̖͍͉̗̏̅̈́̍̔̾ͤ̐ͧ̏͆̃̆̄̚͢͝ͅ ̷̗̠͍̠͍̪͓͇̲͈̥̖͔ͩ͋͌̃̉̿ͤ̐̽ͬ͑ͨͮ̀͡͡N̵̷̡̡͖̤̬̗̖͓̗̣͎̹͓̝̲̥̜̭̹ͣ̒ͧ̿͊̀ͬͨ͌͘A̅̂̓ͪ̔ͧ͒̑̈ͩ͑ͤ̔͠҉̲̪͎͍̱͖Ų̵̶̨̜̣͔͕̘͉͙͔͎͍͍̲̗̝̠̥̮͉̓͌̽͂ͥ̓̅͛ͩ̍̔̄ͪ̎͋ͨ̀̃́G̀̎͂ͫͧ̚҉̴̕͏̮̙̯̲͈͇̘̜H̵̛̹̥̮̩̥͍̰͍̙͕͓͍̬̳̀̀͊͑̇͆͘͞T̶̯̻̮̰͕̯̼̻̦̾̎̓̈̓ͭ̋͌͝͞͡͝Y̴̢̰̬̹̜̺̺͈͔̜̪͈͙̍̋̅̂ͨ̐ͪͧͨ͆̏̑ͮ͢͜͞ ̷̡̡̦̮̦̪̰̥̰̰̪̞̝͙̞̹͈̐̀ͯ̂̅̓͝ͅO̴̦͖̖̐ͫͪ̔͘ͅR̛̛̪͈̹̺̫̳͕ͤ͆̉̌͡͡ ̡̫͙͚̠̭ͯͯ̏ͧͭ̋ͩ̅ͨ̄̌͂̀͝ͅN̴̮̼̱͓͙̭̲͊ͣͣ͗̌͊ͦͤ͛͑ͭͥ͐͂I̡͇̩̮͖̲͍̹̻̮͐ͮ̇͛̍̑ͤ͗ͨͮͫ̍̍͜C̉ͧ͊́̎̀̈̅͗̏̌̃͑̈͛̅̇ͩ͐͏͔̺͈̼͓̣̜E̢̲̼̲͉͕͋̌̀̂͂̽ͨͮ͟,̸̵̨̣͎̹̫̻͖͕͓͉͖̲̖ͪ̄̓̎̏̾͑͊͊̈́̄ͅ ̵̻̺̙̪̦͕̤͓̪̹̪̟̩̠͊ͧͭ͗̑͑ͨ̉ͣ̍ͨ͋ͧͦͭͬ͠A̵ͪ͗̀̇͐̐̏ͨ̈́̚͏̶͖̮̳̟̺͙̣͉̖͉Z̛͉͇̖̺̞͈̘͎̥̪̘̟̪̩̼̥̬̃ͬ̿ͦ͑̀̆͌̑͋?̷̡͕͇̯̳̭̣͚͎͓͔̙̥̦͉̭̩̙͛̇͗͜ͅ



D̷̨̿ͥ̒ͯ́ͦ͋ͭͦͤͦ́ͩ͏̨̰͇̹͎̠͍̘̬͚̞̬͈̠͈̞̠̺̦̞O̓̀ͧ͐̇͛̓̃͒͒͊͑̾͒̂̚͏̶̪̗̤̪̕ ̨̯͔̪̬̦̼͇̠͎̣̘̘̺̜́̃ͤͭͤ͘͟Ỵ̷̡̧̮̰͇͚͕̘̠̞̗̥̅̔̎ͭͨ͜O̡͎͚͚̳͔̯͔͈͙ͯ̀͌̃́̀Ư̢̨̹̩͍̤͓̞̹̤̪̻̰̺̜͇̥̗͍̙͑ͩͧ̿́ͧͣ͑̓̽̿ͫ̊̅̑̅̾̑̿͘ ̧̛͓̬͇̖̘̖͓͍̖͍̟̹̻̩̉ͣ̈̏̊ͦ̎ͣ̓̈ͯ̉̓͑́͢ͅḐ̛͚͍̘͖̗͙̭̋̋̍͛̿͒ͧͥ̾̔̀͡E̷̶̛̫̫͍̤͎̺̤̺̳̭̮̳̫̗͕͓ͬ͒ͦ͊ͮͤ̂͐ͯ͌͂̓̂ͥ̃͌̋̂̚͠ͅS̴̲͖͖̘̥̣͕ͦͣ̅̊̆ͅE̅́ͣ̋͗̎͌̊̉͒̀͏̵̪̯̯̣̦͉͓͔̮̥̯̻̮̳̫̤͔͞ͅͅR̩͔̼̻͉̩͓͙̟͓̼̼͎̭̯̫̫̽ͦͧͦͩ̓ͦ̐̀̔̃͂̅͐̔ͭ̀̚͟V͎̯̮̻̣̖̝̘̖̣̔ͩ̓̍̽̃ͯͮ͗́̉͆̋̅̊͢͞Ȩ̼͈̣͕͉͕̳̜͔̦̠̎̽̃́̎̓͝ ̵̣̫̣̼̭̩̲̩͙͉̪̮͚̪̙͙̱̈́̈́͒͆̌ͧͪ͊̉͑̒̑͌ͬ̈́̚ͅC̈̿͋̋ͤ̎̌̈͛̅̔͋ͦͪͬ̔̍̚͝҉͙̳̩̦͙̘̱̝̠͉̝̖͕͖̣̹́͡O̎͆͑̃͒̍͐͏҉͕̪͇͢͠M̷̧̨̻͚̭͖̩͎̘̙͉̟̙͔͇̉ͪ̆ͬ̈́͑̃ͩ̏ͩ̓̾ͫ̈́̑͜M̶̘̲̞̜̥̟̳̘͇ͯ̅ͥ̆͂ͧ̀͆̈́͑̋̀̕͞͝ͅE̷͋͑͋͏̷͖̹̮͙̖̠̗̮̜̘͙̝Ñ̨ͯ͐ͥͩ̄҉̧̤̭͉̗͎̝̠͙̮͖̙̤̙D̴̖͉̳̹̣̱̥̤̥͇̙͗̽ͬ̓̉̉̔̎̔ͧ̾̇̀ͯ͟Ḁ̢̤̞̻̦̗͈̉̉ͮ͒ͬͭ͂ͨ̉͌͌̏̊͠͡͝T̎͋̓̂ͣ̏̏ͭ̚͏̸̞͓͖͚̞̗̫͚͓̰̟͉̳̀Į̷̸̛̜̺̹̟̟̫̘̳̼͕̱͓͍͈̲͉ͥ̃̎ͫ͒̿̍ͧͤ͌̾̎͆͗̀̀̐ͧÖ̵̢͈̣̠̼͉̌̒ͪͨ̾͛̊̀́́̚N̛͇͚̺̹̗͚̦͙͔̭̖̦̹̹̙̝̙͒ͮ̍̋̌ͧ̉̆̔ͪ́̚͝͞ͅͅ ̸̱̝̫͈͚̬̩̹̎͗̋̌ͥ̉̎ͯ̿ͮͭ̈́̌́̔͟͝F̷̶̧̢͖̞͔͖̯̼̣͍͎̱̜͍͈̀̑̅ͪ̕ͅO̭͚͔͔͇̙̭̦̳̠̙͖͇̟̜͙̓͌́ͭ̆ͬ͒́͜͝ͅR̷͓̺̬̤͔̳̣͚̯̥̻͗ͧ͛̅̓͆͜ ̢̛̣̱͔̟̘̼̣̪͚̻̼͎͔͓ͩ̈́̿͌͊̆ͤ́̑̎ͩ̆̚Y̟͖̙̫͎̫͉̹̲̺̳̭͆̑̽̈̐ͩ̀͊͜ͅƠ̷̶̜̺͕̠͉͇̝̘̜͇̱̞̟̟͇̓̎ͪͪ̅̔̍̏ͭ̌ͬͦ͌͋̍̅̕͝ͅͅU͆̄̏ͤ̄̒̉̓͐̽ͩ͏̸͍̬̱̦̥͔̣̠̠̭͍̠ͅRͯͩͫ͂̇ͯͣͪ͆ͧ̇͗҉̸̬̼̪̭̫̖͓͖̬̘̼̰͙̙̙̥̥ ̶̢̠͖̙͈̲̣͕̲̳͈͓͇̺͕̹̝̇͊ͫ̌̒ͩ͒ͥ̍͛̇̓͑̊̅͟͡A̧͙̟͎̱̩͙̤̎ͯ͂ͦ͟C̹̱̩͕͚͍̝̫̗̎̐ͬ̎̓ͩͣ͋̔ͨ͋̒̂ͯͮ̌̉̃ͨ̕͘T̸͈̠̝̖̬̰͇̺͓̮̍̓ͯͭ̍̔͌̀I̜͇͔͖ͣ̾̒͑̄ͥͭ̃ͧ̅͂̄̓̎̀͘͠Ơ͍̤̯͎̫͕̟̯̟̝̳̮͓̗̋͗̃̈̑ͭ́ͯ͊͛́͟͟N͙̺͓̭̮͕̦ͫ̇͋͂̅ͪ͢S̡̢ͥ̉̏͋̏̌͏̝͕̫̩̼̬̭̣̗ͅ?̢̢̪͓̪͇̮̩̝̘̻̫̱͕̤̣̤̤ͩ͋͐̍ͬ̈́͆̔ͮ̉̽̌͐ͪ̚͢͞

O̷̝̟͓͙͍̳͎̔̄̿͆ͬ͘ͅR̨͉̯͉̙̰͛̀̽̀̚̕͘ ̷̷̷̴̜̯̬͈͈͙͙̭̭̪͖̍̈̅̐͂̊̀ͨ̀̚͜P̵͌͒ͯ͊͋͛ͦͬͭ̂̽͏̵̙̖̹ͅU̢̹̙̜̩̖̘̺̱̫̺̤̭̼͌̓͆̂͗̎ͯ̑͊̑̌ͯ̅ͅN̢̯̻͇͉̖̟̜̻͙̪͙ͯ̈́͛̂̓ͭͥͥ̍͊͞͡I̵̵͂ͦ̍̍ͫͬ̿̒̊ͪ̎ͬ̒̒ͣ̎ͤ͞͏̷̘͕͕͍̱͖S̵̷͇̺̰͙̙͙͑ͪ͗ͦ͊̈͑̈̍̊̽́͟͠ͅH̸̢̹̬̲̮̰̦͈̓͊̋ͦͮ̐ͩ̒̅̑͆̅̿̑͘͜͡ͅM̵̄̒ͩ̒ͯ̄͐́ͭ͒҉̧͓̺̰̰͕͉͇̫̠͉͠E̵̷̛̬̮̣̟̫͚̫̹͎̰͔͚̱̤̲ͭͤ̔͗͆̊ͬͯͮ̃̏ͬ̉͗̌ͭ́̈́̆͜͡N̴̡͖͉̖̘̘̜̥͖̥̘̯̠̾̍ͧͭ͛ͭ͆ͯͦ̈́͘T͌̌̊̽͛͛ͨ̂͏̸̨̨͏͔̳͖̞̱̲̳̺ͅ ͌͆ͦ̄ͩ̌͐͏̶̢͕͓͙̲͓̳̜̻̬̳̜͈͎F̴̢͔̣̹͚̺̜̂͆̉̎ͭ͛̔͐ͪ͜Ơ̼̪̝͖͚̱̗̖̱̬̯̤̞̻͉ͩ͋ͦ͑ͭ̈͆͗̇̾͡ͅͅȒ̶̛̛͇̮͕͉̳̙̗̫̙̭̩̥̥̙̳̭̑͂̓̽͌̎ͧ͒́͛̉ͥͩ͠͞ ̵̛̻̳̙͈̥͆ͯ̄͒̂̆ͥͫ̿Y̙̹̼͈͔̰̖̣̩͎͖̣͖͕̬̙̳͓ͧ͋ͮ͐̈̋͆ͫͣͨ̿̿̄̐̅̈́ͬ̚͞͡O̢̡͔̖̱̩̜͌͛͐͗̾ͪͥ͂̃̆ͯ̈́͊͝͠͡U͚̙̤͆̊̍̐̀͂͑͂́́͟R̶͔͖̺̟̟̣͓̞̙͉͍̯̦̪̥͚ͯͤ̑̽̂̐ͩͤ̓͌͌̒́ͅͅ ̴̧̜̟͈̤̩̿̽̓ͣ̇͂̃͒̊͋̆͑͗ͦ̈́͝Ş̶̟̪͓͕ͤͪ̅͑̓͑̆̄̋ͧ́̕͢͠I̛̹̺̳̮̹͈̮̘͚̟̱͍ͩ͂ͨ̓̏͆ͬ̀̀ͅN̛ͫͥ̎̂ͣ̽͆̏͛̿̀͏̬͕̩̣͙̯̪̘̮̠̗̮ͅͅSͧ̌́ͥͩ̽ͤ̒̈ͫ̃ͦ̉ͦ́̏͑͏̵̨̙͕͈̣̦̮̻̺̮̘͠ ̷̵̙͕̭̞̈̃ͩͥ͋ͣ̌ͫͦ̌̅ͭ͊̈́̐͟͜Ã̴̢̹̘̩͈̤̼͖̙̻̣̉̅̈̓̐̈́ͪ̀ͨ͆ͥ̓͂́̕͘Ṅ̬̖̩͎͚̣͓͍͇͔͈̲̩͇̭ͩ͊̂̎̃ͫ̂̍̾͊̀͆́̀́͝͠D̴͙̮͖͙̭̞̻̳̬̩̈͂̂̓͋͒̾̏͆̈͂̍̌ͩ̎͐́̈́ ̵̺͈͓̲̱͋̓͛͛̃ͩ̑͑̓̈͗̈́́̐͛ͭ́B̡̛̩̫̖̱̩͍̰̱͖̰͓͖ͭ̅ͬͦ̏̽ͬ͐̈́̅͡E͉̗̘̳̭͆̏ͣ̌ͥ͐ͪ̓ͧ́̚͘T̛̍ͬͫ̌̏̈́͒ͨ͡͏̢̱̞͎̳̝̲͎̭͎̝͚̼͍̩͙̜̤̯ͅR̷̐͋͂̿̏̈̒̎̂͆̃ͧ͏҉̧̥̫̺͍̳̞͚͓̲͔̼͚̭ͅA̸̛͕̫̭̲̺̝̜̙̥̲̞̘ͬ̉͛̈́ͧ̈́̆̋́ͧ̀̿̋ͩ͋ͪ̍̔̿̀͢Y̵̱̺͎̗̙̝̙͉ͨ͑̀̎͌ͨ̐̿̇̐̋͊̆A̶̠̝̗̖̓̎̈́ͪ͑͂̆̎ͯ͛̀͋ͥ̑ͬ̌̂̀L̵̨ͭ̔̂̌͌ͪ͂̑̄̑҉̶̺̗̤͓̭͇̥̼̬S̓̏̈́͋̌ͧ͐̈́̉ͬ̓ͨ͗͐̽̚͠͏͎̞̳̖̥͔͔̼͖̜̱̖ͅ?̷̧̪̼͔̥̫̤͕̩̼̰̠͙̣͚́̽̿͛͐̒̐ͫͭ̾̐̍͛̽͡͠

Christmas Thread

Oh jeez that made me snort from laughing.
Also Merry Christmas.

also more pics like that.

"I swear to the old gods Cthulhu if this is another fucking pair of PANK socks with potatoes stuffed in them"

All I got for Christmas was this stupid book.

I can't even read it. All the pages are either composed entirely out of swirling chaos, the infinite stretches of eternity, or pictures of Adam Sandler's face.
Or his actual face. I can't confirm either way.

You know that more than a few people, if Cthulu Claus asked if they've been naughty or nice, would respond with:

"Have I been nice enough for you to be naughty?"

Don't ever say something like that to Cthulu. He fell on some hard times a while back and wound up working in the Japanese adult film industry for a while, trying to make ends meet. His family started talking to him again only recently, and it's a sore subject for all involved.

I got a gift card for some place called exturlugusath, the fuck is that?

Got a toolbox for the truck, and a mixtape filled with an eternity of the indecipherable screaming and gibbering of millennia-old children.

I got a splatter target version of Battleship (when you shoot it, a lot of paint flakes off, making it easier to see where you hit the target) and the guitar tablature book for Mudvayne's Lost and Found (they'd specified bass tab when they ordered it, but it doesn't matter, as I play both).

I was gonna make a joke about getting autographed naughty pictures of a female relative of Cthulu, but I couldn't think of a way to make it funny. Sorry.

I got a rock

Wait wrong holiday

I got eternal suffering in the 9th Plane after I die from Santa Cthulu

I was a naughty girl this year, wonk wink wink wonk

i got many things, because my dad has Poor Kid mentality and buys so many things

notable items:

- leather-bound collection of the hitch-hiker's guide
- a programmable keypad deadbolt for the house!
- gift card to go indoor skydiving
- undertale
- a beaver skull
- a caracal skull
- ugly cat pajamas
- a new phone (fucking finally)
- a game dressing kit (various knives, sharpener, rib spreader, scissors)


hopefully on the road to family christmas we find some sweet roadkill i can blood my knives on :3

Blu Ray player
Ganondorf amiibo
CF amiibo
Daniel Craig bond movies
A couple POP vynel ls
Pokemon cards.
I also saw my cousins so that's neat.

Got a really nice homemade jewelry box

Got clothing, Get Hard on DVD, some sheets and a few things, but I also got a new webcam, so I need to hassle the Hofferes into another tinychat.