AWKWARD ZOMBIE

"I have three kids and no cheddar. Why can't I have no kids and three cheddar?"

"Mom, you're always trying to give me potatoes. What is ot woth you?"
"I just think they're neat."

"Kids can be so cruel."
"We can? Thanks, mom!"

"Why won't those stupid idiots let me in their crappy club for jerks?"

The Simpsons: the most quotable TV show freaking ever

relevant,

We create our own demons.

'Pride, the most insidious of all. It is good until is it bad. And then it is the worst of them all.'

"....so why...can't I sleep...?"

"Rats will eat their own"

"Forswear Kara Zor-El!"

"There are only 49 stars on this flag."
"I'll be deep in the cold, hard ground before I recognise Missourah!"

"No use for grief"

"Fear cuts deeper than swords"

"Valar Morghulis"

"Volar Dohaeris."

"No one... No one understands! I am alone, and you made me like this! You made me! You made me! You're... my... Glob! You're my Glob! "

"No, iceberg lettuce isn't cold! It's green!"

"Attention John Harrison. This is Captain Hikaru Sulu of the USS Enterprise. A shuttle of highly trained officers is on its way to your location. If you do not surrender to them immediately, I will unleash the entire payload of advanced long-range torpedoes currently locked on to your location. You have two minutes to confirm your compliance. Refusal to do so will result in your obliteration. And If you test me, you will fail."

"Mr. Sulu... remind me never to piss you off."

"It...ends...today! Ends without a single loss of life!!"

"I do not help, Mr. Bogan. I oppose."

"No more mercy for cancers posing as men."

"ROGER ON A HARD ROLL!!"

"Somebody call for an exterminator?"
even though the ghost does really low damage

"You see, madness, as you know, is like gravity. All it takes ... is a little push!"