AWKWARD ZOMBIE

If you chicken out from asking a girl out, its not time yet.

Thinking about asking a girl on a date, but not really sure how she feels about me.

Won't know until you ask.

Not really asking advice, but I've always wondered something

How do Internet/long distance relationships work you guys?

Like, I just don't understand how someone can have a meaningful relationship with another person from miles and miles away without ever seeing them in person (and sometimes not even usually talking vocally)

I just do not understand them at all I think.

I always thought long distance relationships were true love.

I don't really think "true love" can be a thing between two people that have never met, or had experiences with eachother. I've found that, personally, love can only be tested by shared experiences and whatnot, not just talking to eachother.

Isn't separation itself a huge test?

I mean, you're trusting this person who may be thousands of miles away that they won't cheat, squander the relationship, or just forget about you entirely. To keep that kind of commitment without any of the real benefits of having a significant other, seems a lot like true love to me.

I don't think you necessarily need close contact to "meet" a person. I mean, photos can show everything physically about a person, how do you actually find about a person? How much do you value looks in a relationship, if at all?

I dunno, to me it seems like long-term relationships are for those who are completely serious about their relationship, not just a fling.

Well here's how I see it

When you say they "make a commitment" I feel as though that commitment basically boils down to picking up the phone or getting on the computer every day or so to speak with them

And please keep in mind I'm not trying to devalue a long term relationship or anything

It's just that, at the end of the day, I find that you can't TRULY know someone unless you've met them in flesh and blood. That's a big thing for me really: talking face to face. Physical contact is also a very important thing. Not just for me personally, but for human beings in general. I just feel that, somewhere along the line in any relationship, a physical element has to be introduced, or it seems that it would become rather frustrating and feel a bit devoid of true affection. Sure, you can be all kinds of affectionate in speech (vocal or otherwise), but really, I cannot see myself being able to take such a relationship seriously, and there's always be that slight doubt that the person on the other end of the screen was not being entirely truthful about some assorted aspects of themselves. I'm not talking full blown lies here, but maybe some stuff left not divulged. I don't know, it really just doesn't seem like a realistic, or fulfilling kind of thing. the separation could be some sort of test, I suppose, but in the end, what would be tested? Patience? Commitment? I don't know if I entirely buy that. And it could also be seen as a bit or a crutch or a screen to hide behind in some cases.

Again, not out to devalue anything, but I've just never understood how it could realistically work for a long period of time.

About ninety percent of human communication is non-vocal, so there's that.

This is true

As I see the thing, it all hinges on whether or not you think physical intimacy is necessary for a relationship.

See, I happen to, but i understand that there are people who feel otherwise.

It goes beyond intimacy though. Physically having someone there should also be important. Not just to be company, but also a person you might want to rely on if you're in trouble, or someone who is not bound by a machine in order to be able to talk to you.

Also I don't see how any semblance of intimacy can be reached without proximity, besides maybe through some sexy talk I guess.

Well certainly one is better than the other, yes, but is it really impossible to have a sustained meaningful emotional connection without a physical presence?

Oh no most certainly not

However, I think it would be quite hard to keep that connection romantic is the thing. I have a few friends that I actually rarely see in the flesh, but I keep up with them online, and I consider them good friends of mine. I just can't see a connection like this being easy to maintain if it were romantic, is all. There can be love, of course, but the spirit of romance, to me, hinges on a physical presence.

I think I'd be more inclined to shy away from absolutes myself; it seems too big of a thing to not take at a case-by-case basis. Clearly it wouldn't work with some people - yourself, for example - but for others? I am hesitant to make the statement that no such make up exists of persons who wouldn't be perfectly suited to such a situation.