AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Granted, everyone else is.

I wish that the sprites would make themselves and make themselves awesome.

Granted, but they rape you hard and when they have done it they disappear forever.

I wish my Coke bottle would refill itself.

Granted, refilled with cyanide!

I wish for my LiveJournal to die.

PAJE GOTTED

Granted but it is resurrected and seeks your brains.

I wish I had an Obama Chia pet.

Granted, but it becomes president and dumps you.

I wish I had more imagination.

Granted, but your imagination destroys the world

I wish I was a cartoon

Declined, you're not real.

I wish someone inserted something here.

Granted,but it's a spear through your intenstines.

I wish I didn't have homework.

Granted, it's "PENIS".
I wish I were famous.

EDIT : hey, you edited your wish, cheater !

Granted but it is 15 minute fame. Because you got raped by a two year old.

I wish i wish.

Well, it depends... Was it a girl or a boy who raped me ? This changes a lot of things...

Granted, but then you wish you wish you wish, and then wish you wish you wish you wish, and finally your head goes BOOM after years of thoughts like that.

I wish Katie loved me deeply.

Granted, but you're pirahna-head and eat her. As in leaving a stump. You dick.

I wish I were a real human.

Granted but you get raped and murdered tomorrow.

I wish I could type down d o l l a r with out the spaces.

Granted, you have to type it with underscores.

Like this; D_o_l_l_a_r

I wish I was steam.

Granted but you will crash often... or you will condense...

Which kind of steam?

I wish he would clarify.