AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Nah. Nowadays horses have more refined taste.

That's why it's illegal to have pornography in your back pocket.

iPhones warrant a beating.

I'm not sure how it is now, but back then if a horse followed you home, you could legally keep it. So they would use ice cream as bait for it. Not sure if you can still do that today.


This one probably isn't real, but the first condoms were meant to be reusable.

Didn't people in Kentucky tie their horses to a post or something when they left them unattended?

Yeah, but I'm guessing a plain booty rope was only slightly less reliable than a piece of straw would be at keeping a horse to a post.

Especially because everyone back then had their knot tying merit badge and a knife. I'm guessing it would come down to either recognizing that one horse didn't belong to the guy riding it, or shooting the fucker if it was your horse he was trying to make off with.

Yea, but like Reyo said. Also, they could have went on the person's property and got the horse while it was fenced in. That would have been more illegal though.

Jewish slaves did not build the great pyramids. Respected stonecutters and architects did.

Also at one point in the 19-20th century, the only brand of kerosene available was Standard Oil, founded by John D. Rockefeller.

(nb4malum)
Thomas Edison killed several animals in attempts to slander AC power, going so far as to develop and test the Electric Chair.

Cucumbers, bell pepers, squash, and tomatoes are technically fruits, as they bear seeds; although, an American law considers tomatoes vegetables for shipping purposes.

30% of relationships involve domestic violence.
50% of relationships end in divorce/break up.
43% of people on the internet use IE.
17% of the slaves on the Middle Passage were white.
100% of my statistics are completely made up. (Does that include this one? Fucking paradoxes.)

No, because I've heard the one about divorce.

Yea, I think I saw some comedian say it. He then followed up with "so it's either you or your wife" or something like that. It's still probably fake though.

a billion seconds ago, it was the late 70's or early 80's.

Bees do not buzz with their wings but rather via several small holes in either side of their torso which they use to breath

You mean they don't have tiny vuvuzelas?

That makes no sense, then why do they only buzz when there flying?

I'm confused

I said something about Edison, and thought you'd say something.

My bayd

oh i thought you were talking about the oil or the pyramids because it was after those
edison is a dick