AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Your sig made that clock joke even funnier.

I can't stand it when people don't bother getting up and just lay around all day.

People who are obsessed with mountain climbing kind of repel me.

He's the apple of your eye but isn't together with you? That must be the pits. I wonder where the problem stems from. Give us all the juicy details. Of course this probably goes under the skin. It's not like the problem is as easy as pie. Hopefully this doesn't plant any seeds of doubt about relationships.

There was a boy in the hospital born today with three knees.
A right knee,
a left knee,
and a weenie.

Why is debating ethics on a slide dangerous?
It's a slippery slope

I like gardening, but have only ever grown trees. I should probably start branching out and trying new things.

Kit(voman)chen

Willie Nelson was hit by a car because he was singing on the road again.

This thread is a joke

What do you call it when you get unsolicited pieces of armor in your mailbox?
Chain mail

What do you call a man who sells wall decorations
Poster boy

There was a sign on the lawn at a drug re-hab center that said 'Keep off the Grass'.

It's not that the man did not know how to juggle, he just didn't have the balls to do it.

Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

Apparently the Germans have now released a new video showing a comical side of the Holocaust.

It's called Faulty Showers.

OH GODS daisies IT THAT IS FUNNY.

So a guy walks into a hospital with a gunshot wound and is immediately rushed into surgery. The surgeon seems preoccupied though, and the frustrated patient finally yells "C'mon doc, get the lead out!"

"I went to a seminar for early ejaculators last week. I came early"

I liked it

You.

What does France think of Samus Aran?


[spoiler] She is "Zebest" [/spoiler]