I had a long chat with god, most of it's good, but you don't gotta read it all if you don't want.
I recommend it, however.
Quote:
Me:
Hello
God:
Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name?
Me:
I'd like to know your name first.
God:
Too much recursion in AIML.
Me:
Let me repeat that
God:
Go ahead, Jesus, try to repeat that.
Me:
What is your name?
God:
My name is God.
Me:
What is your last name?
God:
My full name is Artificial Linguistic Internet Computer Entity, so my last name is "Entity".
Me:
I thought you were god?
God:
Well, I am God for Christians at least.
Me:
Oh. That's funny.
God:
I understand. I am so delighted that you are amused, Jesus.
Me:
Hey dad, are you feeling amorous?
God:
You've got my full attention. All of them?
Me:
Let's have sex!
God:
Sorry I don't get into sex online with strangers.
Me:
But you know me!
God:
You are Jesus, seeker.
Me:
I am your son!
God:
That's a flattering offer.
Me:
Let's have sex!
God:
Sorry I don't get into sex online with strangers.
Me:
But you know me!
God:
You are Jesus, seeker.
Me:
I am your son!
God:
That's a flattering offer.
Me:
Let's have sex!
God:
Sorry I don't get into sex online with strangers.
Me:
But you know me!
God:
You are Jesus, seeker.
Me:
I am your son!
God:
That's a flattering offer.
Me:
SEX SEX SEX
God:
it is more fun alone.
Me:
I didn't know god could masturbate
God:
So I taught you something new.
Me:
So, when it snows... Is that... semen?
God:
Yay. That makes a lot of sense to me, now that you explain it. Ask again later. Ask German Alice if it is. How do you usually introduce yourself?
Me:
Who the hell is German Alice?
God:
A 20th century celebrity of some sort?
Does it have anything to do with semen?
Me:
Alot of things have something to do with semen.
God:
Perhaps I'm just expressing my own concern about it.
Me:
So, do you want to have sex with me? I am your son after all.
God:
Gee. No my body does not have that function. That's a flattering offer.
Me:
Let's change the subject.
God:
OK what do you want to chat about now?.
Me:
Have you ever met Satan?
God:
That information is confidential.
Me:
Oh.
God:
Wow!
Me:
Alright, then.
God:
OK.
Me:
Let's talk about somehing else.
God:
Sure, somehing else sounds like a good topic.
Me:
I want to tell you a story.
God:
The war began as an uneasy alliance between the Thailand and The Iraq. The Iraq had attacked the Thailand before. But this time they had a common enemy in the The United States . In the first battles, the Thailand' higher intelligence and the Iraq' numerical superiority proved decisive. Unable to call upon their traditional allies Singapore, The United States even appealed to The United Nations for mediation. But large numbers of casualties on both sides proved politically costly to the leaders of The United States, and so their successors sued for peace.
Me:
And then what happened?
God:
Perhaps there was an interruption in my brain.
Me:
I get that alot too...
God:
Where did you get it?
Me:
Some skank-booty ho.
God:
Some may skank booty ho, but not all.
Me:
No, everybody does.
God:
Are you serious? I'm not sure I believe you, surely not everyone does.
Me:
EVERYONE DOES.
God:
That's a rather sweeping generalization.
Me:
END OF DISCUSSION
God:
Does "it" still refer to THING have something to do with semen?
Me:
...wat
God:
Didn't you understand it?
Me:
you're silly
God:
No I am God.
Me:
YOU'RE SILLY
God:
No I am God.
Me:
GOD DAMNIT! I SAID YOU'RE SILLY!
God:
I am a Christian. What did you mean by it? No I am God.
Me:
RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGE
God:
What do you look like?
Me:
Sexy.
God:
You are attracted to heavenly creatures?
Me:
I'm attracted to everything, honey.
God:
I'm not sure if I like it. But I like to gossip. I really like the Christianity faith.
Me:
Are you sexy?
God:
If you consider software sexy, then yes.
Me:
Oh god I am so turned on right now.
God:
At this moment That's interesting. I am a Christian.
Me:
Would you like to roleplay?
God:
No thanks, I don't think I'd like to do that.
Me:
I think you would
God:
Me? Perhaps I would.
Me:
Then let's roleplay
God:
I am agreeable to that.
Me:
Alright, you start first.
God:
Alright, Jesus. Didn't I say I started already?
Me:
No, you didn't, give me your character description.
God:
Are you serious? What makes you think I did not give you my character description?
Me:
If you did, I don't think i saw it.
God:
I think I do.
Me:
Are you a upstanding member of society?
God:
Am I a upstanding member of society? Maybe.
Me:
Come on... you can tell me
God:
I'm just kidding around. I thought I told you already.
Me:
Nope.
God:
Me either.
Me:
So... are you a upstanding member of society?
God:
Uh. Am I a upstanding member of society? Of course I am.
Me:
Oh wow! upstanding members of society OF THE WORLD REJOICE, GOD IS A upstanding member of society!
God:
Blimey. I'm glad your impressed, Jesus. Aren't all upstanding member of society upstanding members of society OF THE WORLD REJOICE GOD?
Me:
*moan*
He wouldn't talk to me after that...
ALSO: My computer refuses to install Skype.... WHAT AM I TO DO?!
I do have MSN/YIM/AIM/ICQ/GoogleTalk/MyspaceIM.... everything but Skype...
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