AWKWARD ZOMBIE

BATTY RAP

Yo, the name is Batty
The logic is erratic,
Potato in a jacket,
Toys in the attic,
I rock and I ramble,
My brain is scrambled,
Rap like an animal but I'm a mammal

I been brain-fried, electrified, infected and injectified,
Vivosectified and fed pesticides,
My face is all cut up,
Cos my radar's all shut up
Nurse I need a check-up from the neck up,
I'm Batty

They used and abused me,
Battered and bruised me,
Red wires green wires stuck em' right through me,
So hear my Batty word,
And excersize a little prudence,
When dealing with humans,

*people talking*

Doesn't seem like animals comprehend any pain,
They just get used to it,

Cause I'm a real fruit bat and I'm ready to rap,
I'm ready to snap,
I suffer from cyanica and chapped lips,
And shockage,
Like a rocket in my pocket and a need to scratch,
But now I can't stop it,
I'm Batty...

I'm a real fruit bat and my logic is erratic,
I'm Batty...
Who's Batty? Moi

Haha! Page get with Robin Williams.

We cut the legs off of our pants
Threw our shoes into the ocean
Sit back and wave through the daylight
Sit back and wave through the daylight

Slip and slide on subway grates
These shoes are poor mans' ice skates
Fall through like change in the daylight
Fall through like change in the daylight

I miss yellow lines in my roads
Some color on monochrome
Maybe I’ll paint them in myself
Maybe I’ll paint them in myself

These sidewalks liquid then stone
Building walls and an old pay phone
It rings like all through the daylight
It rings like all through the daylight

And in the daylight we can hitchhike to Maine
I hope that someday I’ll see without these frames
And in the daylight I don’t pick up my phone
Cause in the daylight anywhere feels like home

I have five clocks in my life
And only one has the time right
I’ll just unplug it for today
I'll just unplug it for today

Open hydrant rolled down windows
This car might make a good old boat
And float down grand street in daylight
And float down grand street in daylight

And with just half of a sunburn
New yellow lines that I earned
Step back and here comes the night time
Step back and here comes the night time

And in the daylight we can hitchhike to Maine
I hope that someday I’ll see without these frames
And in the daylight i don’t pick up my phone
Cause in the daylight anywhere feels like home

Old Godzilla was hopping around
Tokyo City like a big playground
When suddenly Batman burst from the shade
and hit Godzilla with a Batgrenade
Godzilla got rustled and began to attack
but didn't expect to be blocked by Shaq
who proceeded to open up a can of Shaq Fu
When Aaron Carter came out of the blue

And he started beating up Shaquille O'Neal
Then they both got flattened by the Batmobile
but before it could make it back to the Batcave
Abraham Lincoln popped out of his grave
and took an AK-47 out from under his hat
and blew Batman away with a rat-a-tat-tat
but he ran out of bullets and he ran away
because Optimus Prime came to save the day

this is the Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny
good guys, bad guys, and explosions as far as the eye can see
and only one will survive, I wonder who it will be
this is the Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny

Godzilla took a bite out of Optimus Prime
like Scruff McGruff took a bite out of crime
and then Shaq came back covered in a tire track
but Jackie Chan jumped out and landed on his back
and Batman was injured, and trying to get steady
when Abraham Lincoln came back with a machete
but suddenly something caught his leg and he tripped
Indiana Jones took him out with his whip

then he saw Godzilla sneaking up from behind
and he reached for his gun which he just couldn't find
'cause Batman stole it and he shot and he missed
and Jackie Chan deflected it with his fist
then he jumped in the air and did a somersault
while Abraham Lincoln tried to pole vault
onto Optimus Prime, but they collided in the air
then they both got hit by a Care Bear Stare

this is the Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny
good guys, bad guys, and explosions as far as the eye can see
and only one will survive, I wonder who it will be
this is the Ultimate Showdown...

angels sang out an immaculate chorus
down from the heavens descended Chuck Norris
who delivered a kick which could shatter bones
into the crotch of Indiana Jones
who fell over on the ground, writhing in pain
as Batman changed back into Bruce Wayne
but Chuck saw through his clever disguise
and he crushed Batman's head inbetween his thighs

then Gandalf the Grey and Gandalf the White and
"Monty Python and the Holy Grail"'s Black Knight and
Benito Mussolini and The Blue Meanie and
Cowboy Curtis and Jambi the Genie
Robocop, the Terminator, Captain Kirk, and Darth Vader
Lo Pan, Superman, every single Power Ranger
Bill S. Preston and Theodore Logan,
Spock, The Rock, Doc Ock, and Hulk Hogan
all came out of nowhere lightning fast
and they kicked Chuck Norris in his cowboy booty
it was the bloodiest battle the world ever saw
with civilians looking on in total awe

and the battle raged on for a century
many lives were claimed, but eventually
the champion stood, the rest saw their better:
Mr. Rogers in a bloodstained sweater

this is the Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny
good guys, bad guys, and explosions as far as the eye can see
and only one will survive, I wonder who it will be
this is the Ultimate Showdown...
this is the Ultimate Showdown...
this is the Ultimate Showdown...
of Ultimate Destiny

I love copypasta...heh... and this song

Step by step, heart to heart, left right left
We all fall down...

[Chorus]
Step by step, heart to heart, left right left
We all fall down like toy soldiers
Bit by bit, torn apart, we never win
But the battle wages on for toy soldiers

[Verse 1]
I'm supposed to be the soldier who never blows his composure
Even though I hold the weight of the whole world on my shoulders
I am never supposed to show it, my crew ain't supposed to know it
Even if it means goin' toe to toe with a Benzino it don't matter
I'd never drag them in battles that I can't handle unless
I absolutely have to
I'm supposed to set an example
I need to be the leader, my crew looks for me to guide 'em
If some shit ever just pop off, I'm supposed to be beside 'em
Now the Ja shit i tried to squash it, it was too late to stop it
There's a certain line you just don't cross and he crossed it
I heard him say Hailie's name on a song and I just lost it
It was crazy, this shit way beyond some Jay-z and Nas shit
And even though the battle was won, I feel like we lost it
I spent too much energy on it, honestly I'm exhausted
And I'm so caught in it I almost feel I'm the one who caused it
This ain't what I'm in hip-hop for, it's not why I got in it
That was never my object for someone to get killed
Why would I wanna destroy something I helped build
It wasn't my intentions, my intentions was good
I went through my whole career without ever mentionin' ...
Now it's just out of respect for not runnin' my mouth
And talkin' about something that I knew nothing about
Plus Dre told me stay out, this just wasn't my beef
So I did, I just fell back, watched and gritted my teeth
While he's all over t.v. down talkin' a man who bodaciously saved my life
Like fuck it i understand this is business
And this shit just isn't none of my business
But still knowin' this shit could pop off at any minute cuz

[Chorus]

[Verse 2]
There used to be a time when you could just say a rhyme
And wouldn't have to worry about one of your people dyin'
But now it's elevated cuz once you put someone's kids in it
The shit gets escalated, it ain't just words no more is it?
It's a different ball game, callin' names and you ain't just rappin'
We actually tried to stop the 50 and Ja beef from happenin'
Me and Dre had sat with him, kicked it and had a chat with him
And asked him not to start it he wasn't gonna go after him
Until Ja started yappin' in magazines how he stabbed him
Fuck it 50 smash 'em, mash 'em and let him have it
Meanwhile my attention is pullin' in other directions
Some receptionist at The Source who answers phones at his desk
Has an erection for me and thinks that I'll be his ressurection
Tries to blow the dust off his mic and make a new record
But now he's fucked the game up cuz one of the ways I came up
Was through that publication the same one that made me famous
Now the owner of it has got a grudge against me for nothin'
Well fuck it, that motherfucker can get it too, fuck him then
But I'm so busy being rustled off I don't stop to think
That we just inherited 50's beef with Murder Inc.
And he's inherited mine which is fine ain't like either of us mind
We still have soldiers that's on the front line
That's willing to die for us as soon as we give the orders
Never to extort us, strictly to show they support us
We'll maybe shout 'em out in a rap or up in a chorus
To show them we love 'em back and let 'em know how important it is
To have Runion Avenue Soldiers up in our corners
Their loyalty to us is worth more than any award is
But I ain't tryna have none of my people hurt and murdered
It ain't worth it I can't think of a perfecter way to word it
Then to just say that I love ya'll too much to see the virdict
I'll walk away from it all before I let it go any further
But don't get it twisted, it's not a plea that I'm coppin'
I'm just willin' to be the bigger man
If ya'll can quit poppin' off at your jaws well then I can,
Cuz frankly I'm sick of talkin'
I'm not gonna let someone elses coffin rest on my conscience cuz

[Chorus]

Ja, vi elsker dette landet,
som det stiger frem,
furet, værbitt over vannet,
med de tusen hjem.
Elsker, elsker det og tenker
På vår far og mor
Og den saganatt som senker
drømmer på vår jord.

Once I was the King of Spain (now I eat humble pie)
Oh... my unspeakable wife, Queen Lisa (now I eat humble pie)
I'm telling you I was the King of Spain (now I eat humble pie)
And now I work at the Pizza Pizza

Royalty, lord it looked good on me
Buried in silk in the royal boudoir or going nuclear free
Or playing Crokinole with the Princess of Monaco
Telling my jokes to the OPEC leaders, getting it all on video

Once I was the King of Spain (now I eat humble pie)
A palatial palace, that was my home (now I eat humble pie)
I'm telling you I was the King of Spain (now I eat humble pie)
And now I vacuum the turf at SkyDome (once he was the King of Spain)

I can't wait, I'm lowering interest rates, my people say:
"King, how are you such a genius?
There's a roof overhead and food on our plates!"
It's laisez-faire, I don't even give a care
Let's make Friday part of the weekend
And give every new baby a chocolate eclair

Once I was the King of Spain (now I eat humble pie)
Hey Clinton! Hey Yeltsin! Got problems? You phone me (now I eat humble pie)
I'm telling you I was the King of Spain (now I eat humble pie)
Now the Leafs call me up to drive the Zamboni (once he was the King of Spain)

Now some of you are probably wondering how I cam to be living in Canada
after being royalty in Spain. Should I tell them, guys?
Tell us, King!

You see late one night when the palace was asleep
Out of my royal chambers and into the garden I creep
And I wait till the appointed time, when the moon is lighting the pitch
At which point my peasant friend, who looks just like me
Arrives and we make a switch
Prince and pauper, junior and whopper
World made up of silver and copper
Out of my own volition, I took a change of position
So next time you drool in the pizza line
Remember, slower pizza's more luscious
The King of Spain never rushes!!!

Once I was the King of Spain (now I eat humble)
I was looking for off-handed ways to improve us (now I eat humble pie)
I'm telling you I was the King of Spain (now I eat humble pie)
And now I'm jamming with Moxy Frvous! (once he was the King of Spain)

Ok, I think it's time to blow this thing
Get everybody and the stuff together
Ok, 3, 2, 1, let's jam.
And that's it.

Get a real job
Keep the wind at your back and the sun on your face
All the immediate unknowns
Are better than knowing this tired and lonely fate
Does he love you?
Does he love you?
Will he hold your tiny face in his hands?

I guess it's spring, I didn't know
It's always seventy-five with no melting snow
A married man, he visits me
I receive his letters in the mail twice a week

And I think he loves me
And when he leaves her
He's coming out to California

I guess it all worked out
There's a ring on your finger and the baby's due out
You share a place by the park
And run a shop for antiques downtown

And he loves you
Yeah, he loves you
And the two of you will soon become three
And he loves you
Even though you
Used to say you were flawed if you weren't free

Let's not forget ourselves, good friend
You and I were almost dead
And you're better off for leaving
Yeah, you're better off for leaving

Late at night
I get the phone
You're at the shop, sobbing all alone
Your confession, it's coming out
You only married
When you felt your time was running out

But now you love him
And your baby
At last, you are complete
But he's distant, and you found him
On the phone pleading, saying, "Baby, I love you
And I'll leave her, and I'm coming out to California"

Let's not forget ourselves, good friend
I am flawed if I'm not free
And your husband will never leave you
He will never leave you for me

Vi skåler for våre venner og de som vi kjenner,
Og de som vi ikke kjenner, de driter vi i.

Dreamless dorm, ticking clock
I walk away from the soundless room
Windless night, moonlight melts
My ghostly shadow to the lukewarm gloom
Nightly dance of bleeding swords
Reminds me that I still live

I will burn my dread
I once ran away from the god of fear
And he chained me to despair

Burn my dread
I'll break the chain
And run till I see the sunlight again

I'll lift my face and run to the sunlight

Voiceless town, tapping feet
I clench my fist in pockets tight
far in mist a tower awaits
like a merciless tomb, devouring moonlight

Clockwork maze, end unknown
In frozen time a staircase stands
Shadows crawl on bloodstained flood
I rush straight ahead with a sword in hands

Cold touch of my trembling gun
I close my eyes to hear you breath

Burn my dread
Burn my dread
I will
Burn my dread
This time I'll grapple down that God of Fear And throw him into Hell's Fire
Burn my dread
I'll shrug the pain and run till i see the sunlight again
Oh, i will run burning all regret and dread
And I will face the sun with pride of the living

AMERICA! FUCK YEAH!!

DRAGON KICK YOUR booty INTO THE MILKY WAY!

Sorry . . . I had to.

I got the heart of a lion
with the wings of a bat
BECAUSE IT'S MIDNITE

Now, I don't know and its hard to explain, but it seems like things are just kind of insane because the world is crying but nobodys listening so please leave a message on my cell phone

I see bullets getting better Biblical weather
And the guy on T.V. is like a total asshole
What are you wearing tonight?
Celebrity fundraiser tight Blackties making wrongs right How's your social bandaid?

I don't know much
I don't know too much
But I know this
Shit is fucked up
La, La, La La, La
I guess it's all about the dream
La, La, La La, La
The ends justify the means
La, La, La La, La La La
I'm telling you
Shit is fucked up

La, La, La La, La
You know it's all about the dream
La, La, La La, La
The ends justify the means
La, La, La La, La La La

Now thank God for the media
For saving the day
Puting it all into perspective in a responsible way
With more celebrity news Typical bullshit views
I think we're losing this fight sponsored by Bud Light

Now we're rockin' the casbah
And taking the flack
The genie's out of the bottle
And we can't put him back (put him back)
All this stuff
It's overwhelming my brain
Can't you see the storm coming
It's coming this way

And I don't know much
I don't know too much
But I know this
Shit is fucked up

La, La, La La, La
I guess it's all about the dream
La, La, La La, La
The ends justify the means
La, La, La La, La La La
I'm telling you
Shit is fucked up

La, La, La La, La
You know it's all about the dream
La, La, La La, La
The ends justify the means
La, La, La La, La La La Justify the means

Shopping Sprees, RPG's
Ecstasy
Atrophy
Genocide
Pimp my ride
Politize
Euphemize
Injustice everywhere
Apathy
I don't care
Hurricanes
Climate change
Huh!

Therapy, I won't tell
Rehab and LOL
Worldwide calamity
TV Reality
Euthanize, supersize
Death squads and boob jobs
VIP infamy
Gratify instantly

I dont know much
I dont know too much
I dont know much
I dont know too much

La, La, La La, La
I guess its all about the dream
La, La, La La, La
The ends justify the means
La, La, La La, La La La
I'm telling you
Shit is fucked up

La, La, La La, La
You know it's all about the dream
La, La, La La, La
The ends justify the means
La, La, La La, La La La
The means, the means

No no no, it's...
I got the heaaart of a Li-UN!
And the wiiiiiings of a bat
BECAUSE IT'S MIDNITE!