TMI & NSFW Thread: Augmented Edition (Heavily Moderated)

Wilicious · **Posted:** Tue Mar 26, 2013 3:29 pm

Cynical Slob wrote:

Alright, I've got this disgusting pimple-like malformity on my pubes. They'd be pimples, but they're almost completely blind and when I squeeze them, only blood comes out. They're right on the joint between my thigh and my pubic area, and they get uncomfortable when I do just about anything that requires the movement of my legs. I hope they're ingrown hairs, I think I might go to a doctor and see what the hell they are.

I got a pin out the other day and tried puncturing one. There was no pain, but apart from the 'eye' (as horrifying as that sounds) the skin wasn't really budging to a puncture. I didn't really get too far into it before I started remembering you have a really fragile artery there and if you cut it you're dead in like, 30 minutes tops.

So, yeah. Human bodies. #lame

These better not be fucking genital warts. I would not be surprised but they better fucking not be

I once cut off a mole with scissors, it bled, a lot. Never saw it again though.

Reyo · **Posted:** Wed Mar 27, 2013 12:37 am

During typical roommate conversation, the topic turned to (started with) sex, and as it turns out, the last time him and his roommate did the tango, he lasted too long, and she got sore before anything happened...

...lol...?

Exeres · **Posted:** Wed Mar 27, 2013 12:49 am

So much gas, what the fuuuuuck.

Blitz Walrus · **Posted:** Wed Mar 27, 2013 12:56 am

had the taste of bile at the back of my throat wake me up late at night twice this week. Yesterday it woke me up right as Rock Lobster was playing, mebbe a connection of some sort.
What the fuck stomach, i thought we were bros.

Nachalnik · **Joined:** Tue Mar 09, 2010 2:23 pm **Posts:** 10836

i can't eat yet i can't stop going to the bathroom all the time

Riku · **Posted:** Wed Mar 27, 2013 2:48 am

When you say you can't eat, do you mean that it makes you feel ill, you're already full, or you aren't allowed?

Because if you mean that eating currently makes you feel ill, then the second part could be because you ate something that had spoiled, and so your system is like "NAH, BRAH. GIMME A CHANCE TO GET THROUGH THIS SHIT FIRST, THEN WE'LL CATCH UP, YEAH? NEED TO DO SOME SPRING CLEANIN' IN HERE, BRAH."

I don't know that your digestive tract talks like that, though. So I guess it could be anything.

Nachalnik · **Joined:** Tue Mar 09, 2010 2:23 pm **Posts:** 10836

i can't eat because i feel stressed. i don't even feel hungry and when i try to eat something it's like i can't even swallow it.

i don't even want to drink anything either.

Riku · **Posted:** Wed Mar 27, 2013 3:06 am

Well, I guess that if you're not hungry, then you're not hungry. I mean, don't go more than a couple of days without eating, but a day or two of no appetite won't hurt anyone who isn't already starving, so I'm not going to say much on that. But you really should still try to sip water at least. Just to make sure you don't get dehydrated. If you're just sipping at it, then it won't even really feel like you're drinking something.

Also, when you say going to the bathroom, do you mean piss? Because I notice the same thing happen whenever I'm up late at night working on something, and so my stomach is empty, but I still have to pee for some stupid reason.

Mr. Mander · **Posted:** Wed Mar 27, 2013 6:56 am

I finally semi-cleared the blockage in my ear

It was earwax

A hell of a lot of earwax

Never seen so much in my life

Lotharu · **Posted:** Wed Mar 27, 2013 7:56 am

One night without moaning coming from upstairs would be great.
Every night since we kicked out the other roommate. I think they're forgetting that I still live here below them.

Mr. Mander · **Posted:** Wed Mar 27, 2013 7:26 pm

Turns out my ear wasn't quite as unblocked as I thought

It also turns out there's a fucking wormhole to the earwax dimension in my right ear because there is no way my ear could possibly contain this much wax

I've gone through like 15 q-tips and I keep coming out with massive hunks of black semi-solidified stuff

brb doctor

TheStranger · **Posted:** Wed Mar 27, 2013 8:23 pm

Nope, thats an actual thing thaat can happen if you dont clean out your ears regularly

Winchester · **Posted:** Wed Mar 27, 2013 8:39 pm

When I was a kid I had so much earwax build up in my left ear that I couldn't hear out of it very well

It almost happened to me again a few years back so now I clean my ears every day

Kamak · **Posted:** Wed Mar 27, 2013 8:54 pm

when I was like, 14, I had a decent sized thing in my ear that disgusted me, and it had appeared in like, the span of a week.

Now, if my ears even so much as feel a bit itchy, I go and clean them.

TheStranger · **Posted:** Wed Mar 27, 2013 8:55 pm

One time, I got the protective plug they used to cover the link cable outlet on the original Gameboy stuck in my ear

AWKWARD ZOMBIE

TMI & NSFW Thread: Augmented Edition (Heavily Moderated)

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