AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Granted.

I wish the turkey in my rotisserie was done now.

Granted, but it got burned.

I wish for an incorruptible wish.

Granted.
All your friends turn into homicidal maniacs that kill froggies.
(WTF)
I wish my Brawl disc worked.

Granted but your wii breaks.

I use my incorruptible wish to return everything to normal.

Granted, nothing happens.

I wish for a giant bowl of Cap'n Crunch with whole milk.

Granted, it tips over and you drown.

I wish there weren't any preps in my neighborhood.

Granted, but now you are a prep.

I wish I knew the answer to:

The wave function of a particle is ψ = A sin(x) between zero and π, and it is zero everywhere else. What is the value of the constant A? What is the probability, that the particle is between zero and 2.28 ?

Its sqrt(pi/2) for A

ok new wish:

I wish I didn't have to work anymore.

Granted, but now you whore yourself for cheddar.

I wish Bruce Willis was my daddy.

Granted, but he is off acting and never has time to play catch. You go suicidal and kill yourself with a keyboard, an electric fan, and a LEGO piece.

I wish my Wii works now.

Granted, but your WiiMotes don't.

I wish for a Jigglypuff.

Granted. After 6 years you realize it was an obese cat who was painted PANK and had voice problems.

I wish I could be pop flyin'.

granted but then you die.

i wish i knew the meaning of life.

Granted. But it's so utterly depressing that your brain shuts down near-instantly.

I wish that people wouldn't be so goddam stupid on Youtube.

Granted, now there are stupid people HERE.

I wish that I had a microwave that has a pizza oven on top of it.

Granted, but it explodes and your pizza is all over the floor and ceiling now. And you can't reach it.

I wish my batteries worked when I put them in instead of magically draining themselves of all power.