AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Sounds like a stupid rule either way. "Bro code" lol

Just ask yourself how comfortable you'd be if one of your friends hooked up with one of your ex's, especially if she's the one who broke it off with you.

It's obviously a thing for some people if it's become a topic in this thread.

I wouldn't mind, because if they're pop flyin' going out with each others, then I'm pop flyin' for them. Because I'm not a possessive person, or a person that holds grudges. Maybe because my friends aren't terrible people, too.

I'd be weird about it, personally. I'm a really private person and I'd feel weird knowing there was someone out there who knew me intimately just loose in the world. Luckily for me I married the first person I dated.

You just have to not get intimate with the wrong people, and you'll be fine.

I have no problem cutting out/avoiding bad people in my life. Which is why I am in such a pop flyin' place, married to someone who will take my secrets to the grave.

Um...
I think you're misunderstanding my post a bit.
"Had," not "have."

It would seem you're in the minority on this, which is the point I was trying to make. I know it's not a written rule backed by mountains of statistics, but it makes sense to say that such a thing would bother any sane person in some way. Maybe even you. I've known people who have said that they share your feelings on the matter. Next thing I know they're cutting their friends out of their lives left and right. I didn't really ask the question to get a physical answer, I just wanted you to ask that of yourself.

It's not about being possessive, it's about the relationship you have with your friend. You agree that your friends should at least know your girlfriend, correct? (Or do you lock her away in your love dungeon?) she breaks it off with you for some reason, and the next thing you know your friend is bringing her along as HIS girlfriend. Unless the two of you decided to stay friends afterwards, and even that has some awkward to it, there's going to be all sorts of tensions in the air.

Besides, I wouldn't want to get with any of my best friends ex's as support to him.



Had have not what?

I'm saying I had a crush on her at one point, not that I still do.
Now that we're both single I guess there's a chance I might become interested again, but at the moment I'm not really feeling anything.

Assuming your post at the top of the page was in response to mine? It seemed like it.

Careful, the way you wrote that makes it look like you think I may be insane.

Well, I did. Considering most of the people I frequent are honest, open people, if there was any awkwardness, we would probably talk it out. However, I don't think there would actually be any awkwardness, based on how much I know my friends. And I don't believe that's being delusional, either.

Based on my own experiences, that's far from being always true. I'm excellent friend with one of my exes (we hang around often, play vidya and drink beers together and have a blast), and I couldn't have cared less if she went out with one of our friends after we broke up. I really don't think it would have been tense. The example you take though - a lady breaks up with you and NEXT THING YOU KNOW she goes out with your friend - isn't really realistic in my opinion. The only people that would do that are people that don't actually consider the feelings of their partners and bad friends (as in, people that don't care for you), but in that case, it's just you hanging out/ going out with people you don't actually know well.
I imagine that a girlfriend leaving you because she fell in love with someone else would hurt, yes, and that it'd be hard to be rational about it. However, it can't be helped, and I don't think outright ruining your relationship with two people you care for because "one of them hurt me once!" isn't very mature.

Are you implying that every break-up is painful/ leaves the people involved in need of help? It's not the case. Of course, if a lady cruelly breaks my heart, I'm not going to want my friends to go out with that person, because I don't want them to be treated badly. If the woman I love breaks up with me while still respecting me, of course I'll need my friends to not go alone through mourning my past relationship. But in the event of an uneventful break-up (These happen, plenty of em. Believe it!), I don't see where the need for [more] support [than usual between friends] comes from.

free love everybody

anyway um awkward moment hmm hmm when you're telling a story about how in this remote village in scotland nobody had ever seen a black person before and when there was a fire and a helicopter flew in and a black man was in it they thought he had a skin problem (and i was shocked because i was like "wow i never thought anybody lived in such a remote place")

yeah there was a person of colour in the group and i had forgotten because i don't tend to go out with her hm

You're not?

To be honest I was going to say "normal" instead of sane, but then there'd be issue of "Are you calling me abnormal?!" It made me come to the conclusion that there was no way to make that point with grace so I said "fuck it."



Then you might be more in control of your emotions than most people I know. It's not unheard of, just slightly unusual. The awkwardness between exes is something a lot of sitcoms will play at, and while it may be unprofessional to base real life on sitcoms all the time, the amount that it happens has to mean something. Just make sure you don't unwittingly harbor resentment for people. Shit like that can sneak up on people.



Well...nothing is "always true". Not even that sentence. It's a mindfuck in itself.

And while that situation may seem unrealistic, it still happens. I guess the rule is in place to show your "bro" that you care enough about the friendship to prevent that kind of fiasco. I wouldn't get with my roommate's current girlfriend no matter the situation (you can sense the crazy on her through the phone.) but if I were to I'd look at the situation and at least ask. It's kinda like that rule where if your friends help you move, you owe them beer and a pizza. It's not just "I owe you one" it's like an excuse to hang out over beer and pizza. A lot of them have secondary meanings.



No, I'm saying that break ups can end in painful situations requiring help, even if they are mutual. The point is it's safer to hold back out of respect. It's the same premise as holding back on dating your friend's sister. If there's intimacies between your friend and a girl, you ask first. He might know some shit you don't, or not feel the most comfortable. Then again, I also feel that it's up to that girl. Then again I'd be wary if one of my friend's exes suddenly showed interest in me after their breakup. Half of it is to be safe in preserving your friend's sanity...half of it is that I was making a joke reference to a sitcom.

If your argument can be summed up by "but that's not normal because I think that's not normal", it's probably not a very good argument.
I do think your argument is not very good at all. I'd even say it's pretty rude.

I don't think it's all that unusual to have a good handle on some part of your emotions, really.
Since I'm at it, I think that basing your analysis of real-life interactions on sitcoms is far from smart.

My argument was also half a joke, so I'm not really putting any effort into it. As for it being rude, well that's your own perception of it. I can be rude...

...you have erroneous amounts of adipose tissue.



Start at 0:19

I asked some friends about their SAT scores and now I don't want to tell them mine because I'll seem like I only brought it up to brag.

I didn't expect theirs to be so low
Like they're intelligent people I don't get it