You sit at your desk, staring at your monitor. You're bored as hell. Everything is just so...
good these days, you think. If there's no bad, how am I supposed to enjoy the good? What's there to give the good
meaning?
Suddenly, you notice activity in a familiar thread. It's been days, you think to yourself. Weeks, even. It couldn't be. But you click. And it is. Like a fiery flame of both hope and wretchedness, you see...
TOUGH LOVE, CHAPTER FOUR!
Enough with this "second person" writing business. Let us get to the reviewing. So, here we have the chapter title page thing. Notice how, out of all the characters shown on the chapter pages, this is by far the most masculine looking.
And yet this is the one that is supposed to be a girl.
Here we see Brian, Chris, and the girl all eating lunch together. Notice how Brian has suddenly become the most stereotypical gay guy ever.
Brian. Yes, we get it. You are openly gay now. This does not mean you need to suddenly start acting like both an annoying girl and a gay stereotype at the same time somehow. That is counter-effective.
Chris is shocked that he hospitalized the jock, as he didn't mean to hurt him that badly. You know, the guy who he said he was going to kill. The guy who he
was going to kill if it wasn't for Chris. That guy. Chris didn't mean to hurt that guy so badly.
Makes sense.
Apparently the whole incident was somehow blamed on an opposing school. Never mind the fact that every single piece of evidence contradicts that, and that it's ludicrous and unbelievable, it's totally the perfect excuse that the school staff definitely somehow buys.
For some reason, Chris, Brian, and the girl all seem to hate school spirit. Why? I don't know. Maybe school spirit killed their dogs or something.
The girl (who is such a bland character that I bodaciously keep forgetting her name. Seriously, she's probably the only character that's bland
even in comparison to characters like Chris and Brian) then invites Chris and Brian over to her house, as she wants to tell them about some boy she met or something. Then, as soon as they display interest, she immediately tells them to shut up. I guess she only likes
silent interest or something.
Notice how she becomes so occupied with telling them to shut up that her neck disappears, and her head just starts floating above her body like some sort of Rayman-ish creature.
Or maybe it's supported by her hair. It's hard to tell.
Everyone immediately teleports to Julie's house using the fast-travel function on the world map, and she begins to tell them about the boy she met.
Anyway, the conversation continues, Brain gets the ever-loving shit beaten out of him, and basically nothing important happens.
Notice the strange "SQUISH" sound effect made when the girl hugs the pillow. I do not want to know what is in that pillow that could possibly be making that noise when squeezed.
I
really don't want to know.
Once again using the fast-travel function, the group heads to a very smoky and shady looking pool place to meet the girl's new boyfriend.
I'm sure he's a very upstanding guy who isn't a delinquent or jerk at all.
The girl introduces Chris and Brian to Dan, and Dan introduces them to Tom. Notice the fact that the smoke in the last panel is labeled as smoke. You know, in case you thought it was an evil army of banana slugs or a swarm of flying snakes or something.
One things that baffles me is Brian's line "he's cute for you". What does that
even mean? Is he implying that he's really good lucking,
especially for someone like her, implying that she's ugly? Is he implying that Dan is
trying to look cute for her? Is he saying that Dan
only looks cute
to her?
I think I need a translator over here.
As soon as the girl looks at Tom, she immediately falls madly in love with him or something.
I cannot for the life of me figure out what Tom's hair color is supposed to be. I have no idea what those strange lines are supposed to represent. I guess it's supposed to be dirty blonde or something, but my mind just interprets it as some sort of sickly green.
Also, in some panels (like the first panel on this page), I think his hair looks kinda like a turban. A sickly green turban.
I do not think his hair could possibly be any worse.
The girl and Dan walk outside. Dan immediately tells her that he doesn't like her hanging out with other guys. For some reason (at least in the first panel), his mouth begins to look like Hella Jeff's mouth as he does so. However, the girl does not seem to notice this, as she is looking up at the sky for some reason.
Anyway, Dan accuses the girl's friends of being fags. While smoking a fag. Oh the... irony, I think? Or is that coincidence? It's hard to tell, sometimes.
The girl hints that he may be right and Dan promptly flips out, claiming that homosexuals are "an abomination against god". I'm pretty sure that he's misusing the word "abomination" there, since I'm pretty sure it's a noun, not a verb, but I could be wrong.
The girl gets rustled off and yells about how glad she is that she was raised by a liberal Jewish (which is OBVIOUSLY the superior religion, since all Christians are a bunch of heartless gay bashers, after all) father. I'm getting some serious self-insert vibes off this girl. Someone check if the author is Jewish for me.
Anyway, they decide to break up. All seems good at first, but then Dan suddenly realizes that he
left his friend alone with some gay people (which is apparently bad for some reason) and shoots poisonous quills out of his body in shock. I guess that's a defense mechanism for Dans, too.
I don't even need to caption this one.
It basically captions itself.
Meanwhile, Tom, Chris and Brian all talk about some stuff no one cares about. MOVING ON
Brian and Chris wonder how Tom keeps himself sane in a Christian school (since that
is the evil religion, after all). Luckily, Tom isn't very religious, allowing him to remain
uncorrupted by
the church's LIIIIIIEEEEEESSSSSS
Also Brian gets an SBaHJ mouth himself in the last panel. It's almost like a testament to how horrible this comic is.
Soon, the girl shows up and tells everyone how they have to leave right now. Why? Because she wants them to, of course. And that is all that matters.
Tom also tries to convince them to stay, but Dan shoots more poisonous quills out of his body and tells Tom that yes, they really need to go.
I like to imagine that several of the quills hit some innocent bystanders, who are now slowly dying in pain from the poison.
The girl tells Chris and Brian about how Dan is a homophobe. The
universe itself finds this
so surprising that the word "what" bodaciously materializes above Brians head, causing him to look up in shock.
Brian then gets all up in her grill and asks if she told him they were gay, causing her to lean back so he isn't in her personal bubble. They talk more about how Tom is a jerk, and in the last panel Julie shrinks down so small that her face is only half visible.
Yeah! Fuck everyone who goes to a private school! They are all so
intolerant of people who are different from them and I hope they all
go to hell and die!
(THAT'S ONE MORE FOR THE "offended" LIST! Let's see what we have so far:
Chinese
Christians
Jocks (not sure if this counts since 'Jock' is technically already an insult but whatever)
Everyone who goes to a Private school
IT IS THE LIST THAT NEVER STOPS GROWING!)
Julie leaves, and Chris and Brian begin walking home. Chris asks if Brian could introduce him to his mother. Brian responds with "Well..."
AND THAT'S THE END OF THE CHAPTER
WHAT A CLIFFHANGER
I AM SURE YOU ARE DRIPPING WITH SUSPENSE
I BET YOU CAN'T WAIT TO SEE THE NEXT CHAPTER
WELL
YOU ARE JUST GONNA HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT.
Login
Register
FAQ
Search
[/spoiler]
