AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Met up with Dave over the weekend for our anniversary, it now ties with Magfest 2016 as best four days of my life. I love that fucking nerd.

I once caught a spouse that cheated in a similar way. It was about 9 months into the relationship and she gave me an old phone of hers that was still logged into her facebook. I had never done anything like it before so felt justified if I took this one little peek. I found out she had sent her ex nude pictures and had an erotic conversation with him about 3 months earlier.
I agree that snooping is wrong, but if its a one time thing (especially if she had suspicion) then it is indeed justified. Are these people typically not sexually exclusive towards each-other? If so then I cant help but feel like that's just something that is more likely to happen when living that lifestyle, and I struggle to find exactly what the wife is upset about. Is it the fact that he hasnt approached her about the subject? Or just the fact that he is being semi-sexual with this other woman? Being open, being trustworthy/trusting, and having respect for your partners wishes are always necessary. No matter what kind of relationship you are in. If the husband hasn't actually committed anything physical then this is the time to step in and have your concerns heard. The husband probably wont be pleased to know she invaded his privacy, but thats the oter side of this double-edged sword. Maybe saying "If you didn't have anything to hide I wouldn't have looked" is enough justification though.

Okay, so.
I feel like I am on the verge of a relationship with someone I care about bodaciously more than anyone ever in my life. I really really want this to go well. I have an issue though.
What do you guys do to keep the relationship going after a while? The last couple ones I've had were great for a while but then they just... fizzled out? We got in a routine way way too easy and each time by the time I noticed to change it up it was too late.
I want this to work out so well I cannot state exactly how much, so any advice would be wonderful.

i might not be the best person because i love routine, but really imo if you feel like it may be fizzling it may just not be meant to be? like i can say that my relationship with kyle has required like...no effort at all. i mean we have things that we've had to work through but it was never hard. but we truly enjoy being with one another and we never grow tired of each others' company or doing things together, and we've been together almost 8 years or something ridiculous like that now. we've never felt like we've had to work to ~keep the magic alive~ or whatever.

a long-term relationship isn't butterflies and racing heart and excitement at seeing your person, it's the feeling of coming home and putting on your pajamas and sitting in your favourite chair and watching tv with a nice cup of tea. i feel like some people think that relationships are always supposed to be exciting, but i feel like it's impossible to keep it that way forever, and trying to would just be exhausting (again, though, i love routine and being unexciting, everyone is different!) but the question to ask is - are YOU okay with it being comfortable and routine? because if so, don't try to change YOU to appease anyone else. fine someone who likes being comfortable too, and be comfortable together.


i guess tl;dr is that my advice is if you ever feel like you have to work at a relationship to keep it alive, then maybe it isn't meant to be.

I love routine myself, but I understand that, unless people are making me do stuff, I can be pretty darn boring sometimes. It just seems to go from feeling like I'm in a relationship to just feeling like an okay friendship with the occasional displays of affection.
The girl I'm talking about I've been friends with for over six years, and we have never run out of things to talk about, or something to do.
Under normal circumstances I'd be thinking it's gonna be great, but I really do not want to mess this up... Again.