AWKWARD ZOMBIE

My cat is sick, and I don't know how to help her yet. A few days ago, she had a fever and stayed in my room all day while I was at work. The day after that, her fever was down so we thought she was getting over whatever was ailing her. She walked around the house and drank some water.

But she hasn't been eating at all--not her regular food, not treats or catnip, not wet cat food or even dog food. And today she's starting vomiting--bright yellow bile. She vomited once this morning and again this evening. She doesn't *seem* to be in pain--massaging her abdomen doesn't make her do anything. And she's peeing and pooping. But she has no energy...

Since she seemed like she was getting better on the second day, I didn't schedule a vet appointment. And the clinics were all closed today (naturally), plus I've had to work every single day while my cat is at home suffering. I'm going to go to the clinic tomorrow morning and beg them to get her in to see a vet as soon as possible.

Awwwww sad Millie :c
I hope she's better soon.

All Millie does most of the day is sleep and hide in the dark corner of my bathroom. She comes out once in a great while but never for very long. She's on antibiotics and I have to force-feed her mushed up cat food because she refuses to eat ANYTHING.

Had a big depressive episode starting Wednesday and it still hasn't left me. Euuugh, I just want to be balanced and not drained all the time.


Working conditions sparked the episode so I gotta talk to the bosses about that, hopefully they'll cooperate with me on that.

I just realized that my existence is worthless and all I bring to people is stress.

Even death wouldn't help because that would ruin everyone else that I have talked to.

Just found out that one of my students died because his mother ran their truck into a train.

One of my favorite customers was diagnosed with liver cancer about a month ago. He seemed healthy at the time and was optimistic that he could beat it. Today his wife came in and said he wasn't even able to get out of bed and that the doctors estimate that he's only got 2 months left. Fuck cancer.

It has been such a bad and emotionally draining month. I want to enter a coma for 2 months, and wake up when hopefully everything is better.

m8 trump takes office in 2 days, come back in 4 years

Everything in my life seems to be going to shit right now. I'm stuck at a dead end job trying to pay off my stupid debt. I can't go back to school until I pay it back. I can't get a better job because the only decent jobs are 30+ miles away and my car fucks up every other week so I can't trust it to take me there. And now this week I have to get a tire on my car replaced and the brake lines replaced. Every time I start to actually save some cheddar, this stupid fucking car messes up again. Also, my right foot has started hurting me the past few days, and I broke it before and didn't get it fixed so now I'm worried I'm going to have to go get it rebroke to fix it. Ugh.

Still fairly optimistic, but shit, things are getting me down lately.

Someday I hope that I'm not so overworked and constantly tired that I won't have to take random sick days for stress-related migraines.

Getting there is kind of a pain in the booty, though.

first petty fight with my mother this year yayyy

My mental health has been in decline since Christmas, I'm convinced that people just don't want to be around me and I should stop trying to befriend people.

My self destructive behaviour is on the rise, and over the weekend I'm not sure if I should drown myself in booze or what.

I can't talk to anyone except a therapist once per week, and even then I have trouble expressing myself.

At this point, my depression is pulling all the strings.

I've been sleeping a lot to pass the time, I don't have a single thing to do so why bother staying awake at all.

It doesn't help that I am so fucked up that I insult people as a joke, oblivious to whether I hurt them or not. I can't help it, it just blurts out.

i'm a walking burnout waiting to happen

same here fam