AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Granted. Everyone takes their useless crap into other threads. So in reality, nothing really changed.

I wish I was taller.

Granted, you are 3 metres tall, but the only part of you that got taller was your neck.

I wish I could fly.

Granted, but you lose all senses.

I wish I had an orchestra following me and playing background music whenever I did something.

Granted, but all it plays is the orchestrated version of "Friday"


I wish i could speed read.

Granted, but now you cannot cocaine read.

I wish I wished.

Granted, but you wished for a duck to replace your arm.

I wish I was a fish.

You are a fish. But you still sit in front of your computer and therefore suffocate.

I wish

Granted but
I wish I wasn't tired right now.

Granted

you are asleep instead

I wish school didn't start tomorrow.

Granted, it started today but you slept through it.

I wish I had three fiddy.

Granted, but now a horrible crustacean from the paleolithic era will hound you forever

I wish the live action Cowboy Bebop movie actually ends up happening and not ending up all sucky

Granted, its awesome, but they make a ton of shitty sequels for cash instead 8===D

I wish for some cold clear water right now. 8===D

Granted, but it's de-ionized, meaning pure H2O. Drinking it causes all the cells in your body to burst due to osmosis. You die an excruciatingly painful death.

I wish I turned into a hot 18 year old girl for a day.

Also, since when is Nessie a crustacean?

Granted. the day happens to be a day when you're/she's on your/her period so it's a terrible day.

I wish I knew what to cook this week.

Granted, you want to cook vegan shepard's pie, but lack the ingredients. you fail, and are forever haunted by the pie that could've been

I wish I could put up a fight in Street Fighter

I was thinkin' of the south park description