AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Granted, you get top marks in all your subjects and graduate top honors. You attend a expensive university and right before you graduate you get hit by a bus and go into a permanent coma.

I wish i were a story book character.

Granted, no more existing in RL for you. Better listen to the writer, now.

I wish for a clean, white sock that will fit my foot (and only my foot), that is not itchy or contains any dangerous Bugs/creatures/viruses/etc. The left one will do.

Granted, but it smells so bad people (including you) pass out in its presence.

I wish that NoA would just let Earthbound on the virtual console and bring Mother 3 to the U.S. (sorry if this was already said).

Granted, but your Wii breaks.

I wish for a hat.

Granted, Headcrab for you!

Zink, I said Clean.

I wish for a whole apple pie, fresh, made with clean, fresh, and insect free apples. Fresh gram cracker crust, too. It will appear on the table in front of me (right side up).

Granted, but there is no pie pan. Your table is infested with bacteria and they climb aboard the pie.

I wish Username would fall off a cliff..

Granted, but you can only wish for wishes.

I still want my sock. (see previous post for details)

Granted but your sock bursts into flames.

I wish Username would fall off a cliff.

Granted but then he dies, goes to heaven and takes control over it and sends you to hell.

I wish my friends would stop trying to get a date for me for the prom.


(appreciate them but GAH I don't trust the guys THEY KNOW)

Granted, but now your not-friends try to get you a date to the prom.

(Stranaton, it is clean, it just smells bad. Its possible for something clean to stink)

I wish that my keyboard would stop randomly not working when I put my computer on stand-by then use it again.

Granted, it dies altogether.

I want an empty cardboard box. a perfect cubic meter in volume.

Granted, but it's a wet cardboard box, rendering it completely useless.

I wish I could eat some French Toast Crunch.

Granted, but you're eating it at night, and everyone treats you like a wierdo.

I wish that cute guy would notice me. In a good way.

EDIT: Granted, but he has herpes on his hands, dick, and tounge.

I wish 4chan never existed.

Granted, but neither would the interwebs people you know today. ]:

I wish for more time.