AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Oh, that's no good. Your marriage will be cursed with ugly children if you approach him first.

But that's sweet. Ill-advised, but sweet.

Guys, she gave me a pie. Guys. Part of a pie. Technically it was her grandparent's idea, but still, there's a pie sitting here. Guys...

Meanwhile, my avatar has been a fairly accurate representation of the last week...

I see she is a proponent of "The fastest way to a man's heart is through his stomach"

Go get'er, Tiger!

OH DUDE
Can you cook?
If so, invite her over for a movie or something, and make her a delicious dinner.

Best way to return the favor of a dessert is with more desserts.

Counting down the days till I get to touch terraems butt again.

Butt deployed for touching.

Guys, guys I fucked up.

After work, I was pitzing around on my phone when the idea hit me in my state of bordom to see if I could find the girl I've been telling you about. My thumb, apparently more ready for that "next level" than I am, DECIDES TO GRAZE THE FRIEND REQUEST BUTTON!

FFFFFFFFFFWHY DID THEY HAVE TO MAKE THAT BUTTON SO...CLICKABLE!?

So, seriously, on a scale of 1 to the DBZ live action movie, just how bad is this?
BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW!

Dude you're acting like this is a game of Operation.

If I meet someone, hit it off, and routinely see them on a day to day basis (like my job or school or something) and we both know eachother's names, I don't feel weird friend requesting them or anything.

Not that I'm ever trying to date anybody but I think, if she seems to like you, it's ok.

If sending a friend request "too early" is a deal-breaker for her(not saying that it is, though), then she takes social media way too seriously. You've barely even scratched the surface of fuck-uppery.

how do i, a socially reserved to the point of awkward individual, do affectionate things

hlep

Be yourself, but also know what other people are comfortable with. Personally, I've had to learn that while I love to give hugs to people I care about, not everyone enjoys it, so I need to be aware of that. It speaks volumes for how much you truly value someone's feelings if you keep their likes and dislikes in mind.

Edit: If you're asking more along the lines of "What kinds of ways can I show affection to people?", well, there are lots of ways. Showing affection goes beyond hugs, kisses, batting the eyelashes, holding hands, etc. Giving gifts, doing small favors, listening(actual listening, not just hearing) when they talk, just spending time together, there's lots of ways to show affection. Again, it's about what makes the other person pop flyin'.

You joke, but if I had to pick a board game to describe my experiences with dating...

I yanked out this lady's kidneys without scraping the sides and she still won't go out with me

anyway if she's legits running circles around an in n' out gate for an hour just to keep chatting, ask her out already

"hey I don't wanna make you run in circles like a goof, let's hang out properly sometime, maybe have lunch or catch a movie?"

At what point does waiting for the right person cross over into having too high of expectations? I definitely don't want to settle for just anyone, but at the same time, I know that nobody's perfect, and I'm having a little trouble making that distinction.