AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Ha, just found out a girl that dumped me several months back regrets it. Not sure what to do with this information, but it makes me pop flyin' in a way.

hey b i got this bundle of posts they were on bulk sale or something maybe you wanna unfunny waste of space, time and resources together sometime


just chat that lass up, give her the small talk, be engaging without being aggressive, make her want to linger a little longer each time you meet

and enclose your punctuation in your quotations you piece of shit

It's all good, man!

the punctuation isn't part of the quote, buttlord

Okay, weirdness time.

I went on a trip for the weekend to visit a friend in another city. When I checked in, the hotel clerk guy was polite and asked me how the drive was, why I was visiting, etc.

Day 2: nothing, he wasn't at work or whatever that day.

Day 3: Today the clerk is back. He asks if I'm leaving today, blah blah. Then he asks me what I do back home. 60 seconds of small talk later, he asks for my number.

There are several problems here. One, I didn't give him my number because that is legitimately not a good way to reach me. I did give him my e-mail though, because I needed a hotel receipt sent to me. Two, he actually e-mailed me, saying he would like to get to know me better. Keep in mind that A) I live in another city 3 hours away and 2) I've talked to him twice. Oh, and C) I'm not anywhere near interested in this guy.

So is there a polite way to reply to his e-mail, saying, "Hey, thanks for being nice I guess, but I'm not interested in you in any way, either romantically or otherwise?" I mean, his only reason for even saying anything to me was: "I think you're pretty," which, while flattering, is a terrible opening statement. You don't know anything about me, guy. You have no reason to pursue me.

This is all very weird and I kinda' just want to ignore everything, but I feel like it would be more appropriate to at least tell the guy something.

you wanted him to stalk you and assess your personality from far away or something? Physical attraction is a perfectly good reason to pursue someone

Anyway just tell him no.

Guys, guys I'm freaking out, guys.

Guys.

News.

You know the Pharmacy Tech girl I told you about before (the girl I told you about is a Pharmacy Tech student btw). Apparently they had cupcakes and soda to celebrate the last day of class, and she gave me the remaining cupcake and one of the sodas.

She did the coffee and biscuits play I was supposed to do!

I'm not just reading into this, am I?

I'm freaking out. In all of my "infinite wisdom" of how the human mind works I don't know what to make of this recent development...

EDIT: There's a cookie in this box also!

Dang it, Reyo, it was supposed to be YOU supplying the biscuits and coffee!

Anyway, it seems like she cares about you in some regard, but I wouldn't say it's definitive proof that she wants to be swept off her feet by your wit and charm.

I'm just paranoid because most of my previous romantic snafoos have been from "You were meant to do things but didn't!" scenarios...

This creates the perfect opportunity to do the play because you can do it in return. If she doesn't feel weird giving you food, she shouldn't be weirded out by you offering food. It also put you on equal footing if she accepts so it's not like you're some homeless dude she gave her left overs to.

I'm really excited for you.

I didn't see your post until after I got into work, I don't have the coffee and biscuits!

That's probably for the best, though. Might seem forced if it's bodaciously the day after she gave me the cookie/cupcake combo. Next Wednesday's not too late to return favors is it?

Not at all. One week is good timing.

If you see her today, say thanks for the cupcake, it was delicious. No need to gush about it of course. You're cool, dude. Cool.

So guess who has a crush on someone who's three years older than him, lives across the ocean, and who he doesn't know very well apart from being members of the same roleplaying community and having shared a six hour long group skype call for Cards Against Humanity with?

If you guessed "You, Sol" then you win the prize.

Meanwhile I'm winning the prize for "Biggest case of 'what the hell, man'"

So last Thursday, girl I mentioned before stopped by the gate and we chatted a bit. The only problem is I do guard a gate to a community, so whenever someone came by, she had to do this thing where she enters and turns back around so we can keep talking. It went on like that for about an hour. I got good feelings about it, but that paranoid bit in my head still needs to look for shit that went wrong.

For example: There were a handful of conversation snippets we had where I might've made her feel ashamed of a few things in her life where I'd never want to make anyone feel ashamed of anything. The biggest one was that her Grandparents paid her way through Pharmacy tech school, which in all honesty I wouldn't see as a detriment on anyone. Besides, being "stereotypical college student" poor is something I typically feel that special sort of "anger to hide the shame" emotion with.

Most of it is there's never a definitive answer for what's "too fast" or "too slow" as well as "too unconfident" and "too arrogant". Maybe once society gets a handle on what it wants with respect to those handles, I'll know what to do with myself. I guess I should be so lucky it was at lease able to establish just how silly that "just be yourself" advice is...

The thing is if it is an issue of "You came off like a dick...you dick!" then backing off would help, but backing off has lead to some predictable results. I could keep with "more of the same", but I legitimately have a concern with coming off as too much of a dick.

EDIT: Almost forgot. Her grandmother also knows me. She'll stop by to talk whenever she comes by as well, mainly just a greeting and smalltalk. Short of it is she lives at the housing complex.

i want to ask Tuxedo Mask to marry me someday