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 Post subject: Re: The Dating Stories/Progress thread
PostPosted: Fri Jan 24, 2014 5:01 pm 
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sugoi ranger
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Music, cutting someone out of your life because they won't date you is typical of the whole "nice guy" fallacy. You're gonna be pretty miserable if you try to get on the good side of every girl or person you're interested in just so you can date or otherwise do things with them. You might as well just cut it out now.

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 Post subject: Re: The Dating Stories/Progress thread
PostPosted: Fri Jan 24, 2014 5:05 pm 
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Okay, my delightful tater tots, Auntie Riku is dishing out Advice Casserole for dinner.

People make questionable choices (we're mainly concerned about your emotional and physical safety, Terra). But everyone is entitled to their choices all the same. Sometimes those choices have more positive effects than negative, and sometimes the opposite is true.

Judgement (from all parties here, even the ones who I like and the ones who I agree with) is also a choice that can have both positive and negative effects, rarely, if ever really being the "right" or "wrong" choice. Voicing judgement against someone's actions or words, even when meant to guide them on the right path, can cause the judged person to decide to further block out your advice and become more firmly set and argumentative about their own opinion/choice.
It should also be known that while it isn't practical to expect everyone to make their decisions (and personal judgement) as unaffected by exceptional stress (both positive and negative) as possible, you should still attempt to avoid casting permanent judgement boxes over people when you're in a state of emotional distress. You can think someone is an asshole all you want, and you're entitled to like/dislike whomever you please, but be aware that YOU are making a decision about what category YOU are placing them in based on YOUR current emotional state. Which means that as a choice, your judgement could potentially have both positive and negative outcomes for everyone involved.
Be aware that everyone is always making choices that you don't necessarily see the causes or effects of, and avoid agitating the emotional distress of others and yourself. Definitively deciding "oh, that guy is an asshole" is just going to agitate you every time his presence is brought up. Once you decide that you don't like someone/something, you will either actively or subconsciously LOOK for reasons to get upset with them. It's not worth the energy output.


Furthermore, I think everyone currently involved in the thread should take a step out. Terra's already gotten his obligatory "uh, make sure you don't dive face-first into a pit of death" warning, maili has already been told that his line of thinking about people is possibly inadvisable, and each one has had a chance to offer up a rebuttal.

Now rinse off your plates and put them in the dishwasher.


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 Post subject: Re: The Dating Stories/Progress thread
PostPosted: Fri Jan 24, 2014 5:33 pm 
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I am not saying I just wanted to get my dick wet Loli, don't be mean.The 2 times we had sex she advanced towards me, and I mistook feelings of lust for that of love. I am not implying she owes me anything. I would be more than pop flyin' if she started dating a nice guy who treated her like a lady. She even almost dated one and I tried to help her out. Her happiness was my number one goal. But I will definitely state the guy shes with is not a nice guy, at least from what I've seen. Maybe behind closed doors he's a sweetheart who just puts on a bravado. But honestly, that really doesn't excuse being a dick 80% of the time. I am absolving our relationship not because she wouldn't date me. But because our relationship was toxic and was doing me more harm than good. Her choosing this jerk, over me or the other nice guy that she couldve been with was just the straw that broke the camels back.

Plate, rinsed.

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 Post subject: Re: The Dating Stories/Progress thread
PostPosted: Fri Jan 24, 2014 5:43 pm 
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((Before I step out, I will clarify that my words of caution were for Terra, not for you, maili.))

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 Post subject: Just friends for now, and that's just fine
PostPosted: Sat Apr 05, 2014 1:06 pm 
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I'm trying to determine whether or not one of my friends likes me. It's hard to explain why I think she might, I just kinda get that vibe. She's pretty introverted and quiet, but often times she'll walk up and initiate conversations with me, and just seems generally friendly towards me. Wow, I'm not explaining this well. I know I'm making it sound like she's just being a good friend, but like I said, it's hard to explain exactly what I mean. You'd kind of have to know her to understand. And while I'm not sure if I like her back, if she does end up liking me, then it's not like I think she's got no chance, uh-uh, never gonna happen, girl. It's just that I haven't really gotten to hang out with her and get to know her that much, since we've both been busy and kind of stressed with school. Also, I'm in between majors and have no job, so I'm not exactly in prime dating position.

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 Post subject: Re: The Dating Stories/Progress thread
PostPosted: Sat Apr 05, 2014 3:27 pm 
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Wellllll sounds like you should hang out with her some more, then. Regardless of whether or not she has feelings for you, she definitely feels comfortable around you, and as an introverted female myself, I think that means that she will be a great friend to you. She might also like you, but who knows, that might come out when the time is right. Sometimes intuition has the right idea and she is trying to subtly hint that she likes you. Of course when its THAT subtle you gotta be careful not to jump to conclusions, but I think you know that already.

For now yeah there's not much chance to hang out with folks (thanks college) but maybe once things die down a bit you guys will get more chances to hang out? Or maybe see if you cna study together or something. Definitely keep in touch since she does seem to care about you, one way or another.

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 Post subject: Re: The Dating Stories/Progress thread
PostPosted: Sat Apr 05, 2014 3:32 pm 
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lord shitpost
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touch her butt

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 Post subject: Maybe smaller than that
PostPosted: Sat Apr 05, 2014 4:16 pm 
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SaintCrazy wrote:
Wellllll sounds like you should hang out with her some more, then. Regardless of whether or not she has feelings for you, she definitely feels comfortable around you, and as an introverted female myself, I think that means that she will be a great friend to you. She might also like you, but who knows, that might come out when the time is right. Sometimes intuition has the right idea and she is trying to subtly hint that she likes you. Of course when its THAT subtle you gotta be careful not to jump to conclusions, but I think you know that already.

For now yeah there's not much chance to hang out with folks (thanks college) but maybe once things die down a bit you guys will get more chances to hang out? Or maybe see if you can study together or something. Definitely keep in touch since she does seem to care about you, one way or another.


Yeah, I definitely will hang out with her more when I can. She seems like a pretty swell lady from the conversations we've had so far.

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Baby steps.

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 Post subject: Re: The Dating Stories/Progress thread
PostPosted: Sat Apr 05, 2014 4:28 pm 
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lord shitpost
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baby steps are called baby steps for a reason

(they're for babies)

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 Post subject: Re: The Dating Stories/Progress thread
PostPosted: Sun Apr 06, 2014 10:29 am 
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The problem is flirting is too subtle, and too many people use it synonymous with "being polite" (which probably helps explain why there's all of this stink about "the friendzone". Crossed wires and mistranslated signals.) We need to go to the system they have in Skyrim, some misc trinket that says we're single/desperate.

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 Post subject: Re: The Dating Stories/Progress thread
PostPosted: Sun Apr 06, 2014 3:00 pm 
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^ that's exactly why i love the idea of claddagh rings - depending on what orientation or hand its on it can tell you the person's relationship status. way better than an engagement ring which only lets someone know that they're about to get married.

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 Post subject: Re: The Dating Stories/Progress thread
PostPosted: Mon Apr 07, 2014 3:21 pm 
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In my opinion the best way to see if a girl likes you is to see how she acts around you in comparison to other guys. From what you're saying it would imply that she does indeed like you, but seeing as how she is introverted that method doesn't work because you don't have anyone to compare yourself to. I would play it safe for now because if you make an advancement and she doesn't feel the same way it'll make the relationship awkward. Stay friends for a little while and if you feel like there's more ask her out to a movie or something.

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 Post subject: Re: The Dating Stories/Progress thread
PostPosted: Mon Apr 07, 2014 8:50 pm 
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Let's talk about sex.
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Boyfriend coming in November.

Far away, but solid.

Time for the gon' get laid dance.

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 Post subject: Re: The Dating Stories/Progress thread
PostPosted: Mon Apr 07, 2014 9:19 pm 
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Wait, I thought you moved to Centralia because your boyfriend lived there.


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 Post subject: Re: The Dating Stories/Progress thread
PostPosted: Mon Apr 07, 2014 9:53 pm 
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I thought it was Australia. They sound similar.

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