AWKWARD ZOMBIE

usually not funny
It is currently Sat Sep 27, 2025 1:53 am

View unanswered posts | View active topics


Board index » Tomfoolery » General Shenanigans

All times are UTC - 5 hours




Post new topic Reply to topic  Page 14 of 59
  [ 876 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1 ... 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17 ... 59  Next
  Print view Previous topic | Next topic 
Author Message
Plasma
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Aug 11, 2009 8:55 am 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Sat Jun 21, 2008 5:06 pm
Posts: 4207
Location: Galway, Ireland
Fooflyer wrote:
What's the difference between a baby and a sandwich?
[spoiler]I don't fuck my sandwich before I eat it[/spoiler]

What? That's awful! Why does your sandwich never get any love too? What, is it too ugly for you, PIG!




Well, what do you think guys mean by "do you want mayo on your sandwich"?
Top
 Profile  
 
Acapulco
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Aug 11, 2009 8:59 am 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Mon Mar 23, 2009 8:52 pm
Posts: 21
Location: Nicerogua
Fooflyer wrote:
What's the difference between a baby and a sandwich?
[spoiler]I don't fuck my sandwich before I eat it[/spoiler]


Are you insinuating cannibalism in the second part of that sentence? ...Or something else?

Here, have a bad joke:
How did the hermit pay for his home?
[spoiler]Alone.[/spoiler]

_________________
Nique ta mère.

Top
 Profile  
 
Avion
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Aug 11, 2009 10:52 am 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Fri Aug 15, 2008 10:32 pm
Posts: 940
(some names were no doubt messed up)

Ok, This guy, named Jon had a friend who was a cripple named Steve, recently the two did some traveling together, afterword, Jon talked to another one of his friends, Jack, about what happened.

Jon started, "First we went to Japan, it was amazing! I got to dance with the geishas and everything!" Jack then asked, "What did Steve do?" Jon replied, "He sat and watched, hes a cripple you know."

Jon continued, "Then we went to the Bahamas, I got to go scuba diving and everything!" Jack once again asked, "What did Steve do?" Jon replied, "He sat on the beach, hes a cripple you know."

Jon then said, "Lastly we went to Rome, Steve really wanted to go to Rome, and we went to the Vatican and met the pope! And the Pope walked up to Steve, whispered a prayer, and then said to Steve, 'stand up'" Jack asked, "What happened then?"

[spoiler]Jon replied, "Steve fell on his booty, hes a cripple you know."[/spoiler]
Top
 Profile  
 
Fooflyer
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Aug 12, 2009 4:14 am 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Sat Sep 20, 2008 6:53 am
Posts: 13334
Location: australia
Acapulco wrote:
Fooflyer wrote:
What's the difference between a baby and a sandwich?
[spoiler]I don't fuck my sandwich before I eat it[/spoiler]


Are you insinuating cannibalism in the second part of that sentence? ...Or something else?

Here, have a bad joke:
How did the hermit pay for his home?
[spoiler]Alone.[/spoiler]


Cannibalism
Top
 Profile  
 
Superior Bacon
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Aug 12, 2009 5:24 am 
Offline
Most Important Member
User avatar

Joined: Tue Mar 24, 2009 1:57 am
Posts: 16573
Location: alcoholism, oregon
What do you call a woman with one black eye?
[spoiler]A quick learner[/spoiler]



:awesome:

_________________
Quote:
[5:06:23 PM] Yeili: this is kind of cool, i've beaten a murderer in mario party.

Image

Top
 Profile  
 
Crushter
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Aug 12, 2009 6:09 am 
Offline
patrolling the mojave almost makes you wish for a nuclear winter
User avatar

Joined: Fri Jul 31, 2009 12:34 am
Posts: 3694
Location: Sheol
Bacon wrote:
What do you call a woman with one black eye?
[spoiler]A quick learner[/spoiler]



:awesome:



:awesome:
Top
 Profile  
 
Mycroft
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Aug 12, 2009 6:20 am 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Sun Jan 11, 2009 7:27 am
Posts: 48
Location: Cornwall, England
How do you stop a baby walking round in circles?

[spoiler]Nail its other foot to the floor[/spoiler]

_________________
Brawl Code: 3437 4547 6101

Top
 Profile  
 
scebboaliwiw
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Aug 12, 2009 6:25 am 
Offline

Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2008 2:33 pm
Posts: 5647
Location: Califormania
Crush Bandicoot wrote:
Bacon wrote:
What do you call a woman with one black eye?
[spoiler]A quick learner[/spoiler]



:awesome:



:awesome:

I thought that they were called women with heterochromia.
Top
 Profile  
 
Miranda
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Aug 12, 2009 8:37 am 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Mon Jul 13, 2009 11:00 am
Posts: 1057
Location: England
scebboaliwiw wrote:
Crush Bandicoot wrote:
Bacon wrote:
What do you call a woman with one black eye?
[spoiler]A quick learner[/spoiler]



:awesome:



:awesome:

I thought that they were called women with heterochromia.


I thought they were called pirates.

_________________
Image

Top
 Profile  
 
Bill Nye the Science Guy
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Aug 12, 2009 3:38 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Sun Oct 26, 2008 6:50 am
Posts: 4990
Location: Touching your inner child
A part of a road walks into a pub, the bartender says "oh, your mate was in here earlier"
and the Road says:

[spoiler]"That ain't no friend of mine, thats a cyclepath[/spoiler]

_________________
Quote:
[11:16:47 PM] George: that girl deserved what she got and you know it

Image

Top
 Profile  
 
Badfish
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Aug 12, 2009 6:58 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Sun Jun 14, 2009 3:52 pm
Posts: 3480
What do you call a black man with Diarrhea?


Nigeria!!

Hahahoho.
Top
 Profile  
 
epona4
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Aug 12, 2009 8:31 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Mon Nov 10, 2008 6:22 pm
Posts: 2507
Fooflyer wrote:
What's the difference between a baby and a sandwich?
[spoiler]I don't fuck my sandwich before I eat it[/spoiler]


I saw this at a high school bathroom when I took my SAT.
Top
 Profile  
 
vannielou
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Aug 12, 2009 8:35 pm 
Offline

Joined: Thu Jul 23, 2009 12:27 pm
Posts: 195
epona4 wrote:
Fooflyer wrote:
What's the difference between a baby and a sandwich?
[spoiler]I don't fuck my sandwich before I eat it[/spoiler]


I saw this at a high school bathroom when I took my SAT.

epic.
Top
 Profile  
 
Avion
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Aug 13, 2009 5:13 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Fri Aug 15, 2008 10:32 pm
Posts: 940
Why do minorities hate the square root of b squared minus 4 times a and c?

[spoiler]its descrimanant![/spoiler]

ok that was bad :(
Top
 Profile  
 
Harby
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Aug 13, 2009 7:51 pm 
Offline

Joined: Thu Jun 11, 2009 10:09 pm
Posts: 194
Location: New Orleans
Ryushusupercat wrote:

A group of kindergartners were trying very hard to become accustomed to the first grade. The biggest hurdle they faced was that the teacher insisted on NO baby talk!
"You need to use 'Big People' words," she was always reminding them.
She asked Chris what he had done over the weekend. "I went to visit my Nana." "No, you went to visit your GRANDMOTHER. Use 'Big People' words!"
She then asked Mitchell whet he had done. "I took a ride on a choo choo." She said "No, you took a ride on a TRAIN. You must remember to use 'Big People' words!"
She then asked little Zach what he had done. "I read a book," he replied. "That's wonderful!" the teacher said. "What book did you read? Zach thought real hard about it, then puffed out his chest with great pride and said...

[spoiler]"Winnie the SHIT!"[/spoiler]


This belongs in a GOOD JOKE thread.

_________________
I'm just going to keep posting untill everyone likes me.

Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  Page 14 of 59
  [ 876 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1 ... 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17 ... 59  Next

Board index » Tomfoolery » General Shenanigans

All times are UTC - 5 hours


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: Bing [Bot] and 1 guest

You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
Powered by phpBB © 2000, 2002, 2005, 2007 phpBB Group