AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Because he doesn't want to talk to you. Not in emails, not in chats, and he definitely doesn't want you to call him. He doesn't want contact with you anymore at all. And honestly? You ARE stalking him, and that IS illegal - and if someone would do that to me, I wouldn't only not want them back as my partner, but I don't want them in my life anymore at all. You are only pestering and bothering him, that doesn't make him want to take you back.

He won't do it Nachal. It's over. Even when you see it in movies and shows and media all the time - you know why it happens there? Because it's FICTION. They do it because directors know that this is what people WANT to see, because LIFE DOESN'T ALWAYS END GOOD.

If you wanted to stay friends with him, then pestering him with emails and fucking stalking him with his phone number or whatever you make up isn't helping this in the least bit - you're driving him away from you instead of getting him back.

For heavens sake woman, you dont even post in any other thread than this one because all you can talk about anymore is how miserable you are about this guy. This is not healthy, NOTHING ABOUT WHAT YOU HAVE BEEN DOING WITH THIS GUY IS HEALTHY. Its over, he's not interested any more, MOVE THE FUCK ON.

Nachal, when you build your life around one specific thing, and then that thing is not a part of your life anymore, it can absolutely feel like you've lost everything. It can be a thing, a place, or in this case a person. If everything in your life was your boyfriend, and then you break up, you've lost your anchor in life. It feels like you have to get him back because he's been so central in your life that it's hard to be without him.

When people on the forums here have been suggesting to find a hobby, or interest group, or new friends to talk to, it wasn't just so you could forget the guy or help you move on (though it would help those things). It's so that you have something else in your life to anchor you. Something you can have when other things come and go in your life.

The idea is to have several anchors, be they hobbies, friends, or anything else that can keep you anchored in life, so that if you lose any one thing important, you aren't sent adrift.

You shouldn't focus on getting this guy back, or latching onto the next guy you find. You should focus on building yourself so that "the next guy" isn't the only thing in your life.

Yes. That. All of that.

i got like 20 friends now though on my steam

i do hobby things every day

Things will get better, one day at a time.

"Oh hey, time to go to work. I like how I'm finally feeling confident and not unredeemably inadequate since I haven't fucked up in a while"

WELL WHAT DO YOU KNOW

Oh my god are you me

Are we the same person

Oh my god

Feeling like shit as of late. Like, really awful. Good thing I work 3rd shift in a practically abandoned part of town, nobody saw me sitting in Subway crying last night.

Maybe I have some sort of imbalance or something. One day I'm pop flyin' and smiling, the next week I just want to die in bed. I """slept""" for almost 13 hours today, got up at the insistence of family (at like 9 PM). Tried to watch my daily Youtube videos, that helped for like an hour, then I couldn't finish and felt crushed again.

Decided to make a midnight Walmart run because why the fuck not. There's nothing else to do in this shitty down, even when the sun is up.

Made a mental list on my drive over (like 2 minutes) of what I needed to get. New insoles, and then maybe some sweet things and comfort foods.

Got the insoles, so my shoes are comfy again. Went to the snacks aisle, heart set on those muddy buddies Chex Mix things. Cookies and cream are the best food I can think of.

They were sold out. I started crying.



So this is my life. Put on a smile and light up a room with jokes and good humor when with friends and family.
Sun sets, there I am crying in a Walmart at 1 AM. i hate myself

Could be manic depression

You should seek out a good psychologist, they can help you

Have you just been feeling this way just recently? If so, then it could be seasonal depression, which can actually be helped by getting vitamin D and doing some light exercise for a while.

Webmd (yea, I know, not the best source, but whatever) has a small list of foods that can help with seasonal depression and more info about it in general.

I hear that working night shifts can mess with mental health as well. Definitely check with a doctor or counselor, even if it's just a recent development. You deserve to feel better.

This is what it sounds like to me, definitely go to a psychologist. Manic depression can mess you up pretty bad. Even if it's something else, a diagnosis is still good.

Quit your shitty job and get a (even slightly) less shitty job. I cannot put into words how miserable a job like that can make a person if they're already struggling with psychological or emotional issues. The cheddar and "security" are not worth it in the long run, and you can always find another job.

i'm really depressed and i still love Tuxedo Mask a lot

i keep thinking of all the times where i took him for granted because i thought he'd never leave me and feeling bad and wishing i could do it over again

he's still ignoring my emails no matter what i say

i'm getting worried he's actually blocked me