AWKWARD ZOMBIE

Lays always make me nauseous if I eat them alone, but the BBQ ones are delicious.

Making a bunch of different-flavored chicken wings tomorrow. I don't give two shits about football but the food on Super Bowl is fantastic.

tostitios were my default chip till i got a tiny wedge stuck in my lung

it hurt so bad and wouldnt come out, almost went to the ER cause i was freaking out so much

So Rubio's has this new teriyaki fish taco

Dear god it is beautiful.

Eating cakepie and it is delicious.

Today we're making some really good scrambled eggs! It's simple but very satisfying (especially when you had something to drink the day before).

And to make it all extra special, this jet here volunteered to help us out:


Now isn't that just the b-


What the h-


IT'S STARSCREAM! DUCK FOR COVER!

Yeeeeeees, puny humans. Today I, STARSCREAM shall show you the proper way of preparing scrambled Earth eggs. Every powerful warrior should eat well before overthrowing their commander, like that fool Megatron.

The first thing you should do is inspect all the recources you have.



We are using your puny chicken eggs, half a paprika, half an onion, diced cheese, a bit of salt. Your valiant mentor has found that baking in olive oil is especially suited for this.


Also, we shall serve it all on a piece of baguette. The only type of bread worthy of being brought before the future ruler of all Decepticons!


First we shall start by dicing all the onion and paprika, like so:


Haha! I can only imagine how they would scream as I use this primitive tool to cut them to pieces. Truly, if I could have one wish it would be for everything to have mouths so I can bask in their terror.

Now we shall burn their corpses on a medium high fire:


Yeeeeeeees, this pleases me greatly. We shall do this for no more than a minute though, for now comes the greatest part in this task.



The breaking of the shells.



Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!



Now don't forget to add a bit of salt. No suffering is complete without the burning salty sensation.

And now, you stir the burning innards up really good.

Desecrate these corpses like you mean it!

Also add a bit of this now, when you're almost done.

I like to think the milk used to make this cheese was stolen from the mouths of baby cows.

Almost done. All what's left is to take a piece of the baguette and cut it through lengthwise.



And now, you may peruse the battlefield at your leisure.



Bask in the destruction you have wrought! One day, perhaps you too shall be in a position to overthrow your own Megatron! And eat some lovely scrambled eggs while you do it.

I love how I read that entire post in his voice.

Salmon Roe

I see your Salmon Roe and raise you...



A SPICY TUNA HAND ROLL

saba sushi master race

Well, sure, now I'm starving.

Ebi nigiri all day, erry day.

Terraem, that omelet post was brilliant.

So... honey mustard.

Nearly every restaurant where I get honey mustard has good honey mustard. But up until recently, I have tried and failed repeatedly to find good honey mustard in a store. It's always too sour, with too much horse radish or something, where honey mustard in restaurants is sweeter.

But finally, we bought some Sweet Baby Rays brand honey mustard, because I love their barbecue sauce. And it was, surprisingly, good. Before now, I refused to eat honey mustard that wasn't made in a restaurant.

I still want to buy a gallon of honey mustard from certain restaurants, though. (Essix. Best seafood ever, and best honey mustard ever. Don't think it's a chain though, so it's all mine.)

Made delicious pork chops.