AWKWARD ZOMBIE

There's this fireman who orders from us a lot, doesn't live but a couple blocks away but always orders two pizzas and occasionally orders 5.
Never leaves a single penny when he signs the card receipt.
I wouldn't be so mad about it but he never so much as turns his head to look at me when his son brings in his food.
I haven't built up the courage to ask him for a tip. Ive thought if he would say no I would say this.

6 out of eleven customers in drive thru don't know anything else but the way of the asshat.

I've hardly ever had asshole customers on counter. (A couple tweakers came in today, but that was two out of like a kajillion I've served in the last three months)

AUGUST 13

Whoever Said There Are No Stupid Questions Needs To Be Shot:
Do you speak and read the same language as the majority of the local population, and the entirety of the service staff? Good news! You are officially capable of reading the signs in the store! And if not reading, then asking for help! This means that you just have to match up the item with the sign that is attached to it, and you'll know the appropriate price.
However, keep in mind, this only works if the tag or sign is actually on the same shelf space as the aforementioned item. A common mistake for "beginners" is (apparently) to assume that just because a more favorable price is somewhere in that aisle, that it applies to the item of their choosing.

I fucking hate you.

I figured that one went without saying.

Free sample, eh? If I take off my glasses they surely won't recognize me and I can go back multiple times!

always be courteous even while having a bad day

because the people in retail stores probably have it worse than you

it hurts how relevant it is to me

This almost applies to me.
I work at a visitor information center/museum and we get some assholes who think that their directions are better, even if they are from fucking Germany.
NO. NO YOU CAN'T GO THAT WAY. I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU THINK I HAVE DRIVEN THIS ROAD 1000 TIMES.

LET ME TELL YOU

ABOUT GROCERY STORES


One tip for not making people hate you: at the grocery I work at, sometimes products will be marked down (mainly because they're about to spoil), and stickers will be put on them to mark how much is taken off. You have to peel this stickers off, see?

there's a bakery, it happens a lot with stuff there.

So, you decide you're gonna save some cheddar and get the ones with all the stickers, yea? Bargain hunting, thing of the future.

The worst time to do this is in the middle of a rush. About 4pm, Sunday, everyone and their inbred nephew is there. And you have a million stickers man. Ya coulda, ya know, kinda peeled em halfway off so it wouldn't take eons to do. But nah, guess you were too busy deciding on your candybar selection.

that's not so bad though I guess, until you tell me that THOSE WERE SUPPOSED TO BE 99 CENTS OFF, WHY AINT IT TAKIN OFF???

okay sure, so I get customer service to do a pricecheck and we have to sit here awkwardly for the next two minutes, watching people pile up in the line.

Finally get everything checked out, looks like your credit card was rejected. So the logical thing to do is pull out a wad of cards and search to see which one is supposed to work

three cards later, you decide to just use debit instead, but you can't remember your pin so you go ahead and call your uncle and see if he can find where you wrote it down.

That is my line
Every goddamned day.

For a second, I thought you were going to have a story of how people rip off the stickers and put them on fresh products and then either get caught in the check out line or pull some stupid booty stunt about how they should get coupons on top of the discount because "THESE ARE FRESH PRODUCTS".

One of my friends works retail at HEB. We weep for him everyday because HEB is notorious for being cunts to work for and the people are bitches to deal with there because of their "brand loyalty".

Can't scan the item? Guess it's free

God I hate when people do that.

And those fucking discount stickers. It was bad enough when bakery was the only thing that got discounted, but now it's grocery and general merchandise and you are a cheap fucker why are you shopping at a Safeway?

Also, pro-tip for those discount stickers, the ones that you're just supposed to peel off. Take one (or two if you have another discounted amount) and just use it continuously, don't worry about always peeling off the sticker. At least they haven't got mad at me yet.

Somehow I have a feeling the US has it the worst with terrible customers. I haven't worked retail but people here seem pretty patient and understanding when shopping.

I mean, People of Walmart is something so bizarre to read, we have nothing like that.

The problem is that people are so used to fast/friendly service that when they don't get it, they feel cheated and get upset at the person for "not doing their job properly" which after a day of dealing with assholes (or more), may be a bit hard to do. The big problems, though, come from the people who prey on the service and do what they can to fuck up everyone's day because that's how they get their kicks. These are the people who report their cashier as having told them to "fuck off" or propositioned sex from them and "now require compensation or else they'll never shop here again". Unfortunately the store doesn't do anything about these people because cheddar is cheddar, and giving them a $10-25 giftcard every week or so is "better for business" than telling them to shove it and never come back.